


A Collection of Random

by Firestar12



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Errortale, Alternate Universe - Inktale, Alternate Universe - Swapfell, Alternate Universe - Underfell, Alternate Universe - Underswap, Because I want to write, Because I'm always thinking of other ideas, But I can't keep one story going for too long, Darker themes later on, Gen, I don't know if I'll tag them or not, I'm so sorry, No set course, Other AUs do show up, Randomness, Swearing, This is more of a writing dump, i honestly don't know what i'm doing, more or less, one shots, undertale - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2018-12-05 04:21:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 71,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11570214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Firestar12/pseuds/Firestar12
Summary: Randomness involving an OC (or you, the reader, if you prefer) who is living with the Swapfell skelebros. I made this series of sort of one-shots because I tend to think of 'what could happen differently' as I'm reading other works and just because I wanted a way to insert a character into random situations I thought of.Not a great summary, but how do you summarize a bunch of one-shots anyways? So, hopefully you'll give this random little series a try and maybe even enjoy it!





	1. Faces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skeletons are weird, okay?

“Hey Razz, can I touch your face?” I asked, looking towards the edgy skeleton curiously. We had become a bit closer recently (strictly platonic of course) and ever since I had first met the two brothers, their being skeletons yet being so emotive had been bothering me. If they’re made of bone, why can their faces move so much?  


My point was proven when Razz looked at me disgustedly. “Why the hell would I let you touch my face?”  


“Because it’s interesting” I answered. He looked at me like I had grown a second head.  


“Please, Razz?” I pleaded, falling down from my sitting position onto the rest of the couch dramatically.  


“Go ask my stupid brother” He told me, looking away from me and back towards the TV, pushing my hands away from him.  


“But I don’t know him as well and he’s scary” I complained, looking at the skeleton sadly.  


“You hardly know me either”  


“But I know you better and friends should always be open to letting other friends touch their face.” I said with a definitive nod.  


“Fine, but under one condition” Razz said, smirking down at me.  


“What?”  


“I can touch your face too”  


“... Alright!” I agreed, jumping up and sitting on the couch facing Razz. He rolled his eye lights and turned to face me, removing his gloves before his hands came up and squished my cheeks in. I grinned and brought my hands up to his face, curiously manipulating his own cheeks. They were actually quite malleable, as I figured out, despite them retaining a form of hardness since they were still made of bone.  


“What is that?” Razz asked, tapping my mouth with his eye sockets narrowed in concentration.  


“What?” I asked, confused as I brushed over the crack below his socket. It seemed to actually be a crack through his skull, nothing but emptiness behind it.  


“That, in your mouth” He said, prying my jaw open. “This. This thing” He said, prodding my tongue.  


“Za’s ma tongue” I told him.  


“No, this is a tongue” He said, removing his hand from my mouth and opening his own mouth, a glowing purple tongue like manifestation behind his sharp teeth.  


“No, that’s magic. This is a real tongue, trust me, I have experience in this kind of thing” I said, sticking mine out and comparing it.  


“I don’t believe you” Razz said, closing his mouth and glaring at me. “That’s just some weird human thing”  


“Okay, okay. What do you use your tongue for?” I asked, retracting my own tongue and looking curiously at the skeleton in front of me.  


“What the hell do you think I use it for?” He asked, glaring at me like I was an idiot for even thinking the question. “Talking and eating”  


“Just like a human” I said, point proven.  


Razz rolled his eye lights and crossed his arms. That brought up another question for me. “So with your eye lights, I’ve seen them change before, like, into diamonds, your regular circles, and then nothing at all. Does that affect your vision?” I asked, Razz’s eye lights looking back towards me.  


“No”  


“So do you even need them to see? Couldn’t you technically walk around without them and be fine? What purpose do they serve?”  


“They’re easier to keep on then not, at least for my specific type of magic. Papyrus doesn’t need them because he’s an asshole”  


“That doesn’t really make sense, but okay” I said, nodding. “So if you’re made of bone, being a skeleton and all” Again with the ‘you’re and idiot look’ “why is your face so malleable and expressive? How do you move without muscles? When you get minor scrapes or bruises, how do those heal?”  


“Why are you asking so many questions?” Razz shot back, not sating my curiosity.  


“Because you’re interesting” I told him. “How many times has another human gotten to meet a living, moving, skeleton? All the ones I’ve ever seen are either dead or in movies.”  


“Why the hell do you see dead skeletons?!”  


“Well, because skeletons come from humans and animals, and the only way to see one is if the person or animal is dead and decomposes or their body is donated to science and they do whatever voodoo magic it is they do to send it to a classroom.” I explained.  


“Since when have humans had skeletons?” Razz asked, looking at me in half confusion and half disgust.  


“Since forever?” I questioned back, unsure. “So you know how I have teeth, right?” I asked, showing him them and preparing to go into mini lecture mode. He nodded. “Well, they’re the only part of the human skeleton that’s visible, the rest is protected by muscle and flesh. Our skeletons are like the foundation of our body, they give something for everything else to build off of. Like here” I said, holding my hand towards him. “feel my hand, it’s got bones pretty similar to yours but just protected by muscle and flesh.” I explained, Razz taking it hesitantly and prodding it. “Humans need muscles to move and our flesh is a thin layer that protects everything while simultaneously keeping all of our vital organs inside our bodies. That’s another thing our skeletons are good for, they protect our most important organs.”  


“Flesh is like stupid, soft squishy armor. What good is that in battle?” Razz asked, obviously frustrated as he threw my hand down and glared at me, expecting an answer.  


I shrugged. “It’s better than nothing and it does heal rather quickly even without the use of magic.” Razz grumbled something and turned away from me, glaring at the wall. Poor wall.  


“You never answered my questions” I complained after a moment, realizing I shared more information than Razz had. Razz refused to speak. I huffed. “Fine, but if you’re not answering any more questions then I’m taxing you” I warned him.  


“What’s the tax?”  


“I want to play with your hand”  


“Absolutely not”  


“Then let me squish your face more” Razz glared at me, remaining silent before he thrust his ungloved hand at me. “Thanks Razz!” I said, grinning and taking his hand, studying it curiously. I saw a hint of a violet appear across his cheekbones. Yet another mystery that would have to be solved some other day.  


“Why are your fingers clawed?” I asked, running my own fingers over the sharply pointed tips of his bones.  


“You said I didn’t have to answer any more questions if I payed the tax and this is the tax” Razz said, grinning smugly at me. I rolled my eyes and continued to mess with his hand, prodding at it and investigating small chips in the bone that only became noticeable when I ran a finger over it. There weren’t many chips, just a few here and there that broke the monotony of the bone and weren’t even noticeable unless you were looking for them.  


I bent Razz’s index finger inwards and saw that it moved normally, not that I was expecting much less. I also realized as I continued to scan his hand and wrist that there weren’t nearly as many bones making them up as a human’s. His bones were also much sturdier, thicker as well, which was probably why him and Papyrus could get away without muscles and stuff. I turned his hand over. There was much more of a palm to it than a human skeleton’s (which, strangely, is mainly phalanges) but, again, had a fewer number of bones.  


I heard the floorboards creak and looked up, Razz’s hand still held in mine. Syrup was standing there, looking at us awkwardly, a slight orange flush on his cheekbones. How does that work? I really wanted to know. Granted, I probably wouldn’t get much more of an answer than ‘magic’. Then I remembered something as Syrup started to edge his way back towards the stairs, Razz glaring dangerously at him. “Wait! Syrup come here, I need to see something!” I called him back, studying him excitedly. I probably wouldn’t get the opportunity to mess with him as much as I was with Razz, but I wanted to compare something.  


Syrup made his way over slowly, seeming a little apprehensive. “Can I see your hand?” I asked, looking towards his pockets where he had them buried. His expression morphed into one of confusion while Razz groaned, taking his own back. “Hey wait, no, I need to compare!” I complained.  


“compare what, exactly?” Syrup asked, his hands still not removed from his pockets as Razz put his gloves back on. I shot a dirty glare at the shorter skeleton before turning back to address Syrup’s question.  


“Well, while I was taxing Razz, I noticed that his fingers were very claw like and I wanted to know if that was a common theme or if it was just him”  


Syrup seemed mildly amused at my answer and Razz didn’t meet his gaze, his arms crossed once again. “it’s a bit of a common theme” Syrup answered, removing a hand from his pocket and showing it to me. While his phalanges weren’t as pointed or sharp as Razz’s were, they were still claw like in appearance and could probably do some damage if someone got on his bad side. Other than that, his hand, from what I saw before he returned it to the abyss of his pocket, was pretty similar to Razz’s with all the same bones just in slightly different proportions. “what’s got ya so interested anyway?” Syrup asked, sitting down on the couch as well and grinning at me.  


I shrugged. “Just curious”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's my first random scenario done! Don't worry, I've got plenty left. And I'm open to constructive criticism so please let me know if you find anything that might need fixing or could be improved upon.
> 
> Thanks for reading =)


	2. It's LEARNIN TIME, BOYS!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just more random, I believe the first sentence of this chapter will give you plenty of insight into what this will be about.

I kicked a rolling model of a human skeleton into the house, slamming the door closed behind me. “We’re learning today, boys!”  


“Why are you always so loud?!” Razz yelled back at me, coming from the kitchen and glaring at me. Then he noticed the skeleton in the living room. “What the fuck?!” His voice pitched up an octave as he looked horrified by it. Syrup, who I hadn’t noticed teleported downstairs, wasn’t looking much better.  


“Welcome to biology!” I said, gesturing towards the skeleton and grinning widely. “You two have been annoying me with how little you know about humans so I’m here to teach you some stuff and get you guys over your weird aversion to the knowledge that humans have skeletons inside them.”  


“I will not attend any learning session from the likes of you. Remove that from my house immediately.” Razz said, looking away from the skeleton and glaring at me.  


“Nope!” I denied. “I’m not removing it until you two agree to let me teach you some things. The longer you deny it, the longer it’s staying around”  


“where did you even get that?” Syrup asked, looking a little sick as he stared at the skeleton, horrified.  


“A friend let me borrow it” I told them, nodding. “And would you two stop looking at it like it’s going to come alive?! Honestly, it’s made of plastic” I said, exasperated as both skeleton brothers watched the thing like it was going to attack them.  


“Well sorry” Razz bit back sarcastically. “How about I shove a dead human into your house and see how you react?”  


“Alright, alright, maybe I was a little rude in just bringing it here without warning, but come on, it’s plastic! And it doesn’t even look like you guys! It’s a human skeleton, not a monster”  


“It doesn’t matter, it’s close enough”  


“Okay, okay, but I’m still teaching you guys. So, what I kinda discovered was that human skeletons are a lot weaker than you guys.” I said, jumping into lecture mode before Razz could argue against it. They will sit through it and suffer to become more knowledgeable, I will not have it any other way.  


“And, as you can see, there are a lot more bones, approximately 206 in the adult body, that make up our skeletons. This is mainly due to ease of movement. However, children and babies actually have more bones, but they fuse together as they grow older. These are mainly in their skulls”  


“What’s the point of young humans having more if they fuse together?” Razz asked, interrupting me as he watched.  


“Well it’s mainly because of how humans are born. More bones are needed so the skull can be more flexible, so to speak, but it doesn’t require that same flexibility as we reach adulthood.”  


“How are humans born?” Razz asked, eyeing the skeleton suspiciously. I noticed Syrup looked curious as well.  


“Well, I’m not sure how monsters are born, but I take it it’s probably got to do with magic”  


“SOULs, mainly” Syrup informed me. I nodded.  


“Well, humans don’t mate with their SOULs. We’re much more physical in nature and rely on intercourse to reproduce” Razz’s face morphed to one of disgust. “This requires a male and female, both carrying different genes that, when fertilized, becomes a baby. When you see women with large stomachs” I gestured outwards with my hands, miming a swollen tummy. “It’s usually because they’re pregnant and another life is growing inside of them.”  


“Like a parasite”  


“Well, I mean, you might get your ass kicked if you say that to anyone else, but yeah, kinda like a parasite. Anyways, when nine or so months-”  


“Nine months?!” Razz looked at me incredulously.  


I nodded. “-when nine months is up, the baby is formed and ready to leave the mother’s womb. This is when the woman goes into labor and the baby is birthed. However, the birthing process is incredibly long and painful and since the area where the baby is supposed to come out of is smaller than the baby, the baby’s skull has to have more flexibility so it can fit through”  


“You humans are disgusting”  


I shrugged. “But back to the skeleton, as you can see here,” I pointed towards the ribs in the general area of the heart and lungs. “this is where our hearts and lungs are housed, behind the ribs where they are protected. Below them are the stomach and intestines, parts of the digestive tract that process the food we eat and give us energy from them. In the skull is where the brain is housed, arguably the most important vital organ.”  


“what do you use them for?” Syrup asked, studying the top half of the skull I had removed from the skeleton. He turned it around in his hands and looked back up at me.  


“Use what for?”  


“your ‘vital organs’”  


“Oh, well we use them to live. The brain is used for thinking and controls the processes of the body. Our heart, our second most important organ, is used to circulate blood through our bodies in order to keep us alive. Our lungs are what we use to breathe and our stomach and intestines are used for digestive purposes.”  


“Why are you so needlessly complicated?!” Razz was getting frustrated with everything. He hadn’t even wanted this lesson in the first place and here I was forcing it on them.  


…  


Oh well.


	3. Magic and SOULs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes it's nice not to be ignorant to things

“Razz, teach me your ways” I said, bored out of my mind as I stretched on the couch towards him.  


“No, you will suffer in your ignorance”  


“You’re so mean” I whined, turning over onto my back and looking up at him backwards. He didn’t seem to care as he flipped a page of whatever book he was reading and didn’t respond. “Syrup, teach me things” I gave up on the edgy monster and turned towards his brother instead who was sitting on the other end of the couch.  


“like what, sweetness?” He asked, grinning down at me.  


“Teach me about monsters and magic and stuff”  


“little broad there, hun”  


“Ugh, okay, tell me about your SOULs. Why are they upside down hearts without a specific trait? And, if monsters are made of magic and stuff, why are they weaker than like, a person?”  


“well, monsters are weaker because our SOULs are attuned to our physical forms and are made of sugar and spice and everything nice, unlike a human’s SOUL” I put a hand over my heart and sniffled, Syrup only grinning in response. “we don’t have SOUL colors because of our whole sugar and spice thing but humans do because you guys can’t seem to live without some sort of label and need to be reminded how special you are compared to everyone else around you. which makes sense i guess, you guys do all look the same” He said, shrugging.  


“Wow, and here I thought I was unique.” I quipped.  


“you all do” Syrup replied, shrugging and grinning.  


“Okay, okay, so we’ll pretend for a moment that monsters are the purest pureness in the world, and all humans are evil scumbags that want to watch the world burn” I said, gesturing lazily with my hands. “Now, what would happen if a monster absorbed a human’s SOUL? Would they become corrupted and start being an op evil-doer, or would they stay pure and still be op, or would they be somewhere in the middle?” I asked, intermeshing my fingers to give a visual before looking back up at Syrup who actually seemed thoughtful.  


“dunno” He answered, shrugging. “only time a monster absorbed a human SOUL was when the first human died and the prince absorbed their SOUL before he died too, so, dunno” He said, shrugging uselessly.  


“Why don’t we test that theory?” Razz asked, grinning wickedly at me.  


“Yeah right, nerd, you couldn’t even beat me when I first met you and was practically frozen in fear. I’d like to see you try and kill me now and then stay in control when you absorbed my SOUL.” I told him, narrowing my eyes at him. I felt his magic spike and saw a bone form in his hand. I kicked it out before he could wind up to throw it at me. “No attacks in the house” I scolded him, glaring as he seethed.  


“I will end you” Razz threatened, teeth grinding together.  


“Go ahead and try” I challenged back.  


“children, please” Syrup said, grinning and trying to hold back his laughter. Razz’s glare immediately shot up to him and Syrup smiled innocently back. You go Syrup, stick it to the man!  


Razz stormed out of the room not too soon after and Syrup and I broke down, almost getting impaled by a few bones because of it. I guess that was the end of my question session. Oh well, I’d have to ask more some other time.


	4. Shopping Antics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Checkout lines are boring...

Razz and I had gone shopping and were both at the checkout line, him just ahead of me with groceries and me behind with my own preferred junk food and necessities that he refused to buy. I nudged him with my carriage boredly. “Do you have a problem?” He asked, turning around and folding his arms.  


“Yeah, I do. You skeletons always take forever at checkouts.” I said, narrowing my eyes at him. “In fact, I think I've gotten stuck behind one of you before, just as slow.” The checkout lady looked uncomfortable as she finished helping the previous customer.  


“If you think I'm going to be so slow, go to a different line.”  


“Psh, why should I? You monsters come up from that mountain and immediately think you can boss us around just because you have magic and are oppressed.” I said, rolling my eyes.  


“Of course we can. And if you have a problem with it I can show you exactly why I think that.” He said, grinning smugly as he unloaded his carriage painfully slowly.  


“You think you can threaten a human? Don't think I haven't heard you monsters are scared shitless of us. You couldn't even beat that kid that fell into your mountain and you aren't even allowed to use magic up here. So I'd love to see you try and harm me.” I said snarkily.  


Razz glared back at me, the checkout lady looking like she wanted to be anywhere than here. “I'll have you know I am a former captain of the Royal Guard.”  


“Yeah, whatever stupid organization that is. It still doesn't change the fact that you couldn't beat a toddler in a fight.”  


“Excuse me” Someone in line behind us interrupted Razz’s and my conversation. “Please don't fight, we need to learn to accept each other and get along.” They said, looking between us passionately.  


Razz and I looked back at them for a moment before I started cracking up, Razz rolling his eye lights with a grin and turning back to finish checking out. The person looked confused and worried as Razz moved out of the way and I started to unload my things onto the checkout. The poor cashier seemed very uncomfortable as she slid my things across the scanner. “We know each other” I explained between chuckles, getting my breath back and looking back at the person.  


“Mm” Razz hummed, looking thoughtful. “I've been trying to get rid of her ever since I tried to kill her” The person seemed dumbfounded, having no idea how to react.  


“Ah, good times.” I reminisced. “But now you're stuck with me~” I called, smiling widely at Razz as I swiped my credit card and started putting my things back into my carriage.  


“I'm leaving you here~” He called back, smiling as he pushed his carriage away.  


“No! Razz! Love me!” I yelled after him, throwing the rest of my things into my carriage and taking off after him, leaving two very dumbfounded people behind me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Funny story, I didn't actually come up with this story idea myself. An aunt of mine actually did this with a friend of hers one time (I wasn't there, I just heard the story about it) and I thought it was too funny to pass up writing about it. Hope you enjoyed!


	5. Shorts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shorts (too short to constitute posting on their own even though they have nothing to do with each other).

“What the fuck was that?!” Razz yelled from the kitchen as thunder boomed overhead and rain pounded on the outside of the house. Syrup, who was sitting next to me on the couch, seemed tense.  


“What are you talking about?” I called back, glancing out the window in time to see a flash of lightning. God, thunderstorms are so cool.  


The thunder boomed again, louder and closer this time, and I saw Syrup flinch and Razz jump as he entered the living room. “Fucking that!” Razz yelled at me, gesturing wildly outside.  


“It’s just thunder, dude, calm down” I said, actually a little worried about the two.  


“it’s not a cave in?” Syrup asked, voice quieter than normal as he hesitantly peeked outside, flinching back when another bolt of lightning flashed overhead.  


Oh, so that’s why the noise is freaking them out. “No, it’s not a cave in, just thunder.” I said, both seeming to calm a little at the reassurance. The thunder clapped overhead again, nearly immediately over us. Both flinched.  


“where... where does it come from?” Syrup asked, turning away from the window towards me questioningly.  


I thought for a moment, a little confused at the question. “Well, thunder itself comes from the lightning we see during a storm but it’s not synced up because light travels faster than sound." I furrowed my brows, trying to recall my middle school days. "And the reason we have storms is because of how weather works. I don’t know for sure since I’m not an expert, but I think thunderstorms form in a pretty similar way to rain with the water cycle and all that.” I explained, looking outside as another flash of lightning illuminated the street.

\------------------------------  


“Oh look dear, our baby brought home a boy. Oh I knew you had it in you, honey” My mom said, greeting me and looking Razz over. She turned back to me after a moment and smiled widely. “I didn't know you were dating a monster, honey. Of course anyone you date is okay with us so long as they’re good to you.”  


“We’re not dating, mom” I told her, rolling my eyes and ignoring Razz’s angry blush. “I wouldn't date this loser anyways. This is one of the skeletons I live with. His name is Razz.” I explained to her, Razz nodding to affirm the point before realizing I called him a loser and hitting me upside the head.  


“He's not nice to me either” I said, frowning and rubbing the spot. My dad came into the room and looked Razz over.  


“So you're finally dating, huh?” He asked, smiling at me and watching Razz carefully, that defensive dad trope coming out to play.  


“No dad, I'm not dating. I don't even like Razz like that, hardly at all even” I felt the short skeleton’s glare on the back of my head. “He's just one of the skeletons I live with for some reason who insisted on coming over with me for another unknown reason.”  


“Well, honey, if you don’t....” My mom looked at Razz nervously for a moment before speaking a little quieter. “If you don’t enjoy living with them then why do you? They don't... force you to stay with them, do they?" She asked, watching Razz cautiously.  


“I never said I didn’t enjoy living with them. Razz is just a pain sometimes” I explained. “But he buys most of the food so it makes up for it” I said, smiling at the grumpy skeleton. “Plus he’s fun to annoy”  


“Okay, honey, if you say so.” The rest of my visit home went normally, mom and dad interrogating Razz in their own way and eventually sending us home with good will and lots of cookies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry these were so short and random, I just decided I wanted to write about these scenarios and I didn't really think it was necessary to expand on them.


	6. [Insert Song Title Here]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know when you just _have_ to sing along to your favorite songs?

Back in Black came on on the radio, much to Razz’s misfortune. I started air guitaring along to it and moving around with the beat, head bobbing along with it. “Back in black! I hit the sack! I’ve been too long and I’m glad to be back” I sung, moving around the kitchen as I made up my own dance moves and tortured Razz. “Yes I’m let loose, from the noose that’s kept me hanging about.”  


“Shut up!”  


“Nine lives~ Cat’s eyes” I kept singing, ignoring the grumpy skeleton. “Cause I’m back. Yes, I’m back. Well, I’m back.”  


“Say something, I’m giving up on you” I sang to Razz, one hand over my chest and another reaching towards him. “I’ll be the one, if you want me to”  


“I don’t” He grumbled, smacking my hand away.  


“I learned to live, half alive. And now you want me one more time.” I sang, both hands over my chest as I looked sadly at Razz.  


“I never wanted you”  


“And who do you think you are? Running ‘round, leaving scars. Collecting your jar of hearts.”  


“I would not collect your disgusting vital organs” Razz said, nose ridge crinkling in disgust.  


“And tearing love apart.” I sang on, unperturbed by Razz’s running commentary. “You’re gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your SOUL. So don’t come back for me. Who do you think you are?”  


“You’re always the one who ends up finding me, trash mammal. And damn straight my SOUL is ice cold. Don’t forget it, either.”  


“Oh won’t you, stay with me? Cause you’re all I need”  


“No”  


“This ain’t love, it’s clear to see. But darlin’, stay with me”  


“Die alone”  


“Tonight, I’m gonna have myself a real good time. I feel ali-i-i-ivee~” I sang.  


“If only you weren’t”  


“And floating around in ecstasy. So, don’t stop me nooooow” I sang, drawing out the ‘now’ longer than it needed to be. “Cause I’m havin a good time, havin a good time!” I sang loudly, Razz groaning as I grinned and moved around. “I’m gonna go, go, go, gooo, there’s no stopping meee!!” Razz attempted to trip me. “Don’t stop me noooow. I’m havin such a good time, I’m havin a ball” I sang at him, grinning widely as he rolled his eye lights. “If you wanna have a good time, just give me a call” I mimed a phone with my fingers and winked at Razz. Razz mimed a gun with his own fingers and pointed it at himself. I winked and finger gunned at him.  


“Oh-ho-ho, it’s magic! Ya knooow. Never believe it’s not so. It’s magic!”  


“We know”  


“Never believe it’s not so.”  


“I got the magic in me”  


“You are a human, you clearly do not unless you managed to keep your magic a secret from us for this long.”  


“Everybody knows I got the magic in me”  


“Everybody knows you’re a pathological liar”  


“Magic, magic, magic” I sang, grinning as Razz rolled his eyes.  


“Once upon a time, yes a very long time ago, lived a family noble and old whose children were very close. And on and on it goes” I sang.  


“Hey do it right!” Razz cut in, stealing the beginning of the song. “‘Now to your throne’ the butler starts the show”  


“Ready, go!”  


“A knife and a fork to point in your face, I’ll take you any day” Razz sang, grinning at me.  


“After all we’re noble, the middle class, grandest and richest of families so don’t ever look down on us. So bow down to us, you peasants. Standing here’s your prince and princess. We’re here to call to attention all of your mistakes.”  


“Hey hold up, hold up, aren’t you lying again? Whataya bet you can’t see through anything I throw at you?” Razz sang, hands on his hips as he narrowed his sockets at me.  


“Right, right, right, right, I’ll leave them under you since you want it so bad” I sang back condescendingly, grinning smugly at him.  


“You’re just so annoying! God, just so annoying! Acting high and mighty around me like you’re the queen.” He scoffed, glaring at me. “Ready, aim, and fire! Gong that never tires. Rioting tonight, it’s a war but not a fist fight.”  


“Causing so much trouble, see my mischief double. Come on boy, you gotta admit that I do it in style. And for buying at this ‘special bargain sale’ I thank you for your precious service beat you fair and square!” I sang, letting out a triumphant 'ha!'.  


“Back, backing away, retreat, but have an idea to beat. Giving into her puerile goals, we’re head to head and toe to toe” We were in fact toe to toe, Razz standing on his to meet my eyes with a defiant glare. “Who the hell do you think I am? Yeah I know who, but that’s a slam." Razz moved away again, crossing his arms. "Calling me so dumb, thinking that I’ll run, maybe humilty’s not so bad.”  


“Now, now, everyone come and take a hand please. It’s only natural that I’m tranquil. If you really didn’t know a cheat by nature, you’re always looking for that one thing greater. It’s in my blood you know we’re famous for our war strength. This one there, that one there, everywhere. Yes, I won the fight!” I sang back, winking as I held my hand in a peace sign.  


“Right, right, right, right, guess you earned a gold star for very good job” Razz sang back, smirking at me now.  


“You’re just so annoying! God, just so annoying! Acting high and mighty around me like you are the king. I’ll strike even harder, shoot you till you topple. Retribution, punishment, I’ll make you feel all of it” I sang back, my turn to be annoyed.  


“Looking down upon you, seeing through all your moves. Chance is for the taking, you’re dancing to my own beat. Got a little messy, missed you by a hair. Oh well, it looks like I’m the winner beat you fair and square” Razz sang, shrugging while he grinned.  


“But it’s you and nobody can compare” We sang at each other. 

“You’re the only rival that I can bare” 

“Falling to my knees, losing like I’m weak” 

“Would drive me insane, so for tonight it’s you and me but I’ll win, hey, hey, hey, hey” We sang, beginning to argue.  


“Listen up here, buddy, you should really thank me more for what I’ve done. You’re always so weak and I’ve always had to stand up for you. What kind of person lets their friend do that?! I swear, even though you’re older you don’t act like it! That’s why from today I’ve decided that I’ll be the older one, okay? Okay?” We argued over each other, Razz making his part as well.  


“Oh, you wanna do this now? Cause we can do this now. For one thing, you’re always running off on your own and I end up having to clean up after you. I’m not an idiot I’m just careful unlike you. Everyone agrees, so why don’t just chill out for once in your life, okay? Oh my God, shut up!” Razz yelled at me, both of us increasingly frustrated. He was ready to leave, but there was no stopping now.  


"Hey, come back here!"  


“You’re just so annoying! God, just so annoying!” Razz sang at me, a finger poised dangerously under my chin as we glared at each other. “Yelling at me like I’m a dog, but you’re just all bark. Ready, aim, and fire! Gong that never tires. Generation rising the one to rule-”  


“Will be me!” I interrupted. “Causing so much trouble, see my mischief double. C’mon boy, you gotta admit that I do it in style. From one to a hundred, I’ll take whatever’s there! I thank you for your precious service, beat you fair and-”  


“Wait a second, woah, was this a draw??”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs, in order:  
> \- Back in Black by AC/DC  
> \- Say Something (I'm Giving up on You) by A Great Big World  
> \- Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri  
> \- Stay with Me by Sam Smith  
> \- Don't Stop me Now by Queen  
> \- Magic by Pilot  
> \- Magic by B.o.B  
> \- Childish War (English Cover) by Judie Phonic and rachie
> 
> Welp, that's that. I know it may seem a little odd with Razz singing at the end but when I listened to Childish War I thought it summed up our protagonist's relationship with Razz pretty well.


	7. Drugs are bad, kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I honestly don't know what I was thinking when I made this chapter, but, eh. Hope you don't mind, but I just had to add the three other universes (UT, US, UF) and Ink, Error, and Fresh. Just for clarification, everyone does know each other and is already familiar with each other and occasionally get together to hang out or do crap like this...

We were visiting the Undertale house along with some of the other AUs and all of us were feeling a bit too happy go lucky thanks to Swap Papyrus’s pot brownies. No one knew he had snuck the drug in until it was too late. “RAZZ!! WHY DON’T YOU LOVE ME??!!” I yelled in distress to the purple skeleton, tears building in my eyes.  


“DON’T YELL AT ME!” He yelled back at me.  


“RAZZ” I cried, laying across Red in desolation. He patted my back comfortingly.  


I hummed the Mission Impossible theme song as I snuck up on Ink and tackled him to the ground. “One down” I counted off, narrowing my eyes as I looked around for my next victim. I spotted Error and snuck towards him, tackling him to the ground next.  


“I DON’T WANT TO BE TOUCHED THIS WAY!!” Error screamed, flailing underneath me. I pet his head and calmed him down.  


“Mission almost complete. The last to destroy is the parasitic entity known as the Fresh!Sans.” I said, looking around the room again and locating the only monster not drugged up to the roof. I crawled off Error and started moving towards him on my hands and knees, Error following behind me. A double take down. I motioned dramatically with my hand that Error should go around the other way to more effectively ensnare our prey.  


Error looked at me for a full minute, his signs flickering thoughtfully. I stared back at him before he moved off towards Fresh again. I followed behind him. “Uh, broskis, what are you doin’?” Fresh asked as we closed in on him.  


“Attac!” I screamed, jumping from the ground and lunging at the skelebone. Error and I successfully knocked Fresh to the ground and laid on top of him.  


“Bros, I love you guys and all, but could we have a radical pile some other time?” Fresh asked, trying to ESCAPE. No escape allowed. Trapped.  


Eventually Fresh escaped without Error’s or my notice. “Noo, comfy skelebone, come back!” I cried out, reaching helplessly towards the radical skel.  


“I’m not comfy?” Error asked me emotionally, signs flickering more quickly.  


“Yes, but Fresh is more comfy” I told him. I didn’t want to have this talk with him, but skelebones need to know when they’re comfy and when they’re not. “You’re just not comfy right now, but you were earlier” I said, breaking it to him. “I’m sorry” I said, patting his shoulder as we sat up, Error’s sockets brimming.  


“Don’t touch me, I’m not comfy” He sulked, crossing his arms and looking away sadly.  


“Just not right now” I corrected him, pulling myself up onto my feet.  


“I want to paint my nails!” Ink exclaimed, taking a paint thing off his sash and holding it in the air proudly.  


“Ooh, paint mine too!” I shouted, waving my hand wildly in the air.  


“Okay!” Ink agreed, moving over to me and pulling me onto the couch with him and the other skelebones on it. “I need to test this color first!” He said, grabbing Sans’s hand and unscrewing the top of the canister with a concentrated look. It popped off and Ink looked into it in confusion. “What am I supposed to paint with?” He asked, looking over at me.  


“A brush” I answered wisely, Ink’s face lighting up in understanding as he grabbed a brush from his sash and splopped it into the container.  


“no need to paint my colors” Sans said, chuckling at his sentence as we watched Ink paint his fingers.  


“Done!” Ink cried out, holding Sans’s hand up that was covered in bright pink and blue paint.  


“It’s cotton candy!” I shouted, looking at the masterpiece in wonder.  


“i want cotton candy!” Syrup said from somewhere.  


“it’s my cotton candy” Sans defended, pulling his hand back down and pouting towards wherever Syrup was.  


I squished Error’s cheeks in, mesmerized by them. He was looking in fascination at my own, pulling them apart and squishing them back together. “How do cheeks even work?” I asked quietly, squishing his backwards.  


“Where’s the rock? Where’s the rock?!” I screamed, looking frantically for the potentially lost pet.  


“OUR ROCK IS MISSING?!” Papyrus yelled back, standing quickly from the floor with wide sockets.  


“It’s not here!” I cried back at him, gesturing to the table where the rock wasn’t, tears brimming in my eyes.  


“SANS! WHERE IS THE ROCK?! IT WOULDN’T RUN AWAY!!!” Papyrus shouted to his brother in distress.  


“the rock?” Sans asked.  


“OUR PET!” Papyrus shouted.  


“Oh wait it’s right here” I said, sighing loudly in relief as I found the rock on the other table.  


“OH THANK GOD” Papyrus said, wiping perspiration from his skull and moving over to the rock, petting it. “I WILL TAKE BETTER CARE OF YOU, ROCK. I WILL NO LONGER LET SANS NEGLECT YOU” He cried dramatically, taking sprinkles out of nowhere and dumping the entire container on his pet.  


“Look at this, do you see this line. I think it means I’m going to live a long life” I said, leaning over the back of the couch as I showed Red my hand, pointing to the lines on it. “And this one is for how many memes I get each day. It’s a lot” I confided, pointing to a different one. Red studied my hand before looking to his own.  


“what’s this one mean?” He asked me, holding his hand up to me and pointing to his palm.  


“Hmm” I hummed, studying it intently. “It says you’re probably gay” I told him, nodding sagely.  


Red gasped, looking at his hand in fascination. “how did it know?” He asked me with large eye lights.  


“The palm knows all” I answered mysteriously, waving my hands in front of me.  


“The entire world is going to become Sanses” I said, horrified as I looked at Red with wide eyes.  


He looked back at me, shocked. “no, hell no, i can’t deal with more of me. there’s too many already”  


“I THINK WE’RE GREAT” Blueberry interrupted, posing with a grin.  


“We have to stop the plague. It’s going to spread. I’m in danger! Don’t let me become one of you!” I cried out, holding onto Red’s shoulders and looking into his eyes.  


“we have to save you! oh god, but you’re already infected!” Red shouted back, eyes wide as he looked at me fearfully. “sans, what do we do?!” He yelled at Sans, looking between him and me frantically.  


“WOULD YOU TWO SHUT UP?! YOU ARE ALREADY A SANS, RED” Razz yelled at us, pointing an accusing finger at the skele I was clinging onto for dear life.  


“What?!” Red screamed, looking down at himself in horror. “No! No! I’m too young!” He cried out, shaking his hands in distress.  


“It’s going to turn us all!!!” I screeched, jumping off the couch and watching the Sanses warily.  


“Don’t leave me like this!” Red cried, reaching towards me helplessly.  


“I have to find an antidote! It’s the only way!” I shouted in realization.  


“I THINK THERE’S ONE IN THE FRIDGE” Blueberry said helpfully.  


“Of course! I’ll be right back!” I told Red, bolting towards the kitchen. Red cried behind me.  


“Fresh, I’m sorry to break this to you” I said, patting his shoulder sympathetically as he looked at me. “but you’re a skeleton”  


“Bro, you sure you’re feelin’ alright?” He asked, in denial of the news.  


I shook my head sadly. This always happened. “I’m sorry I had to be the one to break this news to you, but someone had to do it.” I consoled him. “It’ll be okay though, there are plenty of other skeletons out there. I’m sure you’ll find your place” I reassured him. His glasses changed from YOLO to WHAT. It was very difficult news to hear indeed. I gave his shoulder one last sympathetic squeeze and left him to figure everything out for himself.  


“Food!!” I said, dumping all my junk food on the couch. I snatched up my potato chips and ate them defensively, glaring at Honey who had tried to steal them. He tried to steal one and I batted his hand away, turning my back on him and protecting my food. Honey offered me a handful of m and ms in exchange. I looked at them skeptically before deciding it was a reasonable trade and exchanged snacks with him.  


“Look, look, listen” I told Red, hitting my chest while I sat next to him.  


“to what?” He asked, looking with narrowed eyes at my chest.  


“Just listen, just listen” I urged him. He moved his skull closer and pressed his ear canal against my chest, face concentrated as he listened.  


“there’s a drum in your body” He said, moving his head away and looking at me in confusion.  


“No, no, it’s a heartbeat. It’s not a drum. Probably. I don’t think there’s a littler person inside me pounding on a drum. Would they have a drummer inside them too then?” I asked, thinking this issue through.  


“but then the little person in them would need a drummer too and it would go too far into infinity” Red explained, waving a bony hand through the air.  


“Why don’t you have a little person inside you?” I asked, turning to him. Red looked thoughtful for a moment as he put his hand to his own chest and waited.  


“i have a bunch of little people inside me” He said, looking at me in surprise.  


“Nuh-uh. Why would you have more little people than me?”  


“i don’t know. listen. there’s like, an entire band in there.” He said, seeming startled. I frowned and put my ear to his chest, listening intently. There were a lot of little people, playing heavy drums and electric guitar in a melody.  


“You have, like, a concert or something going on” I told him, sitting back up and looking at him.  


“does everyone else have little people inside them?” Red asked, a hand still over his chest as he looked at me.  


“Mm” I hummed, looking over at Sans next to us skeptically. “Sans, do you have a concert in you?” I asked him.  


“yep” He answered, nodding and grinning.  


“Well, I guess that answers it, everyone has little people inside them” I said, shrugging at Red.  


“Wait, wait. Don’t you have a skeleton inside of you?” Razz asked, looking at me with wide sockets.  


My eyes widened. “Do I?” I asked, studying my hand. “Where is it? Where is it?!” I cried out. “There’s only this. It’s gone. Where’s the skeleton?!”  


“It’s in you! Under your weird stuff!” Razz told me, pointing at the skin covering me.  


“Get it off! Get it off!” I shouted, pulling on my hand. Razz started pulling on my arm.  


“It’s not coming off!” He cried out. We both cried for the loss of the skeleton.  


“What is this?” I asked, poking Ink’s cheek where a black splop was.  


“What?” He asked back, papping his own cheek.  


“This. This thing. Why is it here?” I said, tapping it again between his fingers.  


“I don’t know” Ink told me wonderingly. “Has it always been there?”  


“Mmaaybe. I don’t know.” I answered, squinting at the splorp suspiciously. Why is it here? What does it want from us?  


“Do you see this, Error?” I asked, pointing in the mirror at his face. He was leaning on me, looking at our reflections with a weird face. “This” I said, tapping the mirror seriously. “This is the face of a skeleton” I said.  


Error blinked at it for a minute. “This one?” He asked, pointing at my face.  


“No, no, no, this one. Yours” I clarified, pointing to his.  


“What is it?” He asked, looking at me in confusion.  


“It’s a skeleton” I answered.  


“It is?” He asked, looking back at the mirror. “I’m a skeleton?”  


“Razz, you’re like a brother to me” I said, having an emotional conversation with my skeleton brother. “A really annoying brother”  


“That’s all I’ve ever wanted to be” He said, sniffling. “And you’re like the sister I never wanted”  


I put a hand over my heart, tears building in my own eyes now. I sniffed and we hugged it out, kicking Syrup away when he tried to join.  


“PILE!” Blueberry shouted happily.  


“No! Am doin a protec!” I yelled back, hugging Red closer and glaring protectively at the blueberry.  


“BUT I WANT TO BE PROTECTED!” Blue cried, looking at us sadly.  


I shook my head. “I can only do one protec at a time.” I explained to him, tightening my grip on Red when he fidgeted.  


“OKAY” Blueberry said, pouting sadly.  


“PILLOW FIGHT!” Papyrus announced, standing up from the couch all tall like.  


“Where?” I asked, looking curiously around. If there was a pillow fight I wanted to watch.  


“NYEH!” Papyrus chucked a pillow at me, it falling to the ground in front of my face. I blinked and looked at it. Where’s its competitor?  


“Who’s it fighting?” I asked, confused when Papyrus didn’t do anything else.  


“OH, IS THAT HOW IT’S SUPPOSED TO WORK?” Papyrus asked, picking up the pillow’s competitor and bringing it over to me.  


“Well you knocked out the first one, we need another fighter” I told him, looking at the pillow on the ground. Such a short life.  


“ERM” Papyrus looked around and located a different pillow fighter. “HERE, THESE TWO SHALL BATTLE” He said, placing both on the ground. The first flopped over onto the second. “NYEH HEH, MINE WON!”  


“that was dumb. we didn’t even get a chance to bet on who would win.” Syrup said, showing up like magic. _Magic._  


“WELL I GUESS WE CAN BET” Papyrus agreed, looking at the pillows with concentration. “I BET ON THE RED ONE!” He said, pointing to one.  


“okay. i bet on the other one” Syrup agreed, all of us focusing on the two pillows. They did nothing.  


“Error, I’m comfy now!” I yelled at the skeleton, Sans and Red both trying to steal my coziness levels.  


“I want to be comfy!” Error yelled back, upset.  


“Come be comfy with me!” I called. The skel looked at me for a minute before coming over and joining in the pile.  


“They’re not comfy” Error complained.  


“Cause I stole all their comfy levels. I am the max coze.” I explained, shifting Sans so Error could get some of my comfiness.  


“Give them some comfy back, I don’t want to be uncomfy” Error told me, moving Red over.  


“No, I am max comf” I denied, stretching out on the couch. Error found a comfy spot and napped on me. The others not in the comfy pile noticed my max levels of coze and joined in. I am a benevolent comfy overlord. I am the sole holder of the coze. I fell asleep too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk if this is how drugs work, but I needed an excuse for these shenanigans. 
> 
> Everyone belongs to their respective owners!


	8. Shorts 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More random shorts because I don't write anything long enough to warrant a chapter of its own.

“Hup”  


I flopped over onto Razz as we all chilled on the couch. He wasn’t immediately uncomfortable like I thought something made of bone might be. That is until I felt him put his book down, brace his hands against my side, and shove me right off his lap and onto the floor. He picked up his book again like nothing had happened. “Mean” I huffed, pushing myself off the floor and sitting back up on the couch.  


I fell over against Razz and leaned against his arm. He shoved me off with his other hand towards the rest of the couch and Syrup. I wouldn’t go down without a fight and swung my legs up onto his lap. He shoved them off. I spun and wrapped my arms around him, feeling him stiffen under my grip. I grinned and pulled him back with me, keeping his arms trapped with mine as he began to try and fight against it. “GET OFF ME, FILTHY PEASANT!” He screeched at me, struggling in vain to escape. I heard Syrup chuckle behind us and my grin widened.  


“pet him” Syrup whispered to me, right in my ear. I glanced back at him as I held the angry skeleton captive. He was grinning and tapped his skull before pointing to the monster in my hands. _Oh, okay._ I understood, deftly wrapping my legs around Razz, ignoring his furiously purple face, and freed up one of my hands. I papped his skull, feeling him freeze up, before I began running my hand down. _Oh, that actually feels kind of nice._ I realized, Razz’s skull pleasantly smooth (albeit a bit hot because of how terribly he was blushing), with only a few nicks and cracks here and there.  


I hummed happily as Razz stopped fighting and just kind of sat there, not seeming to enjoy or deny my pets. 

Until he started purring. 

_Weird._

Razz's purring started off incredibly quiet, like he was trying to fight showing his contentment before it steadily got louder until it reached a soft sound. Even his eye sockets had drifted closed. I mused about what this scenario and new information (cause I had had no idea Razz could purr) might mean. _I might be able to blackmail him._ I shook my head slightly at the idea. _Nah, if I do that he probably won’t trust me enough to purr ever again._ And as weird as it was to admit (though I’d never say it to his face), Razz purring contentedly in my arms just like a cat is oddly adorable.  


Maybe I could experiment with it more sometime.  


\--  


“I hate everything” Razz grumbled, flopping onto the couch and over me. Syrup wasn't home, so it gave Razz more time to vent than he usually got. 

“Why's that?” I asked, undoing the knot in the back of his bandanna. I let it fall and he threw it onto the floor. 

“Fucking Alphys again. She's such a bitch.” He told me, huffing and pushing himself up to sit next to me. 

“And?” I pressed, mildly interested. This had almost become a routine. Razz getting home and venting about something or another to me until it was off his chest or Syrup came home. 

“And she continues to spend less and less time actually training than she does mocking me or fucking her wife.” Razz said, glaring at nothing. 

He went on for quite some time. 

Razz didn’t even say anything as he entered the house, he just kicked off his shoes, closed the door and walked over to the couch. He sat on top of me and I saw his frown twitch upwards slightly as I huffed, putting my phone down and unknotting his bandanna for him. He leaned back into me as I tossed his bandanna on the couch near us, grin on his teeth as I grumbled, upset at having my internet browsing interrupted by an attention seeking skeleton. “Did you want to talk about it?” I asked. I usually wasn’t the one to initiate these conversations, but Razz seemed a bit quieter than usual. 

“No” He denied, shaking his head. After a moment of silence he shrugged his shoulders, indicating he wanted me to massage them for him. I narrowed my eyes at the back of his skull. This proved to be ineffective since he only dug his shoulder blade into my arm. 

I rolled my eyes and moved my hands up to Razz’s shoulders, wondering why he seemed to like massages so much if he had no muscles to massage. He started purring as I did what I could with what little I was given. I was kind of glad I hadn’t made fun of him for it the first time he purred. There was something calming about it, even if I had to work for it. 

I hummed as Razz purred, his sockets closed and body relaxed forwards in my lap. “Thank you” Razz said quietly, his purrs almost drowning it out and his relaxed body language making it seem like he hadn’t said anything at all. 

I hummed in acknowledgement of his gratitude. “No problem” 

\-- 

I groaned, not moving from the floor as the heat attempted to kill me. All the windows were open, letting in hot breezes that the fans blew around and out again. There existed no form of relief. I seriously considered locking myself in the refrigerator for the rest of the summer.  


“Get off the floor, trash mammal. You’re in the way.” Razz told me, prodding me with the toe of his boot. I groaned and slowly pushed myself up to my feet. I moved into the kitchen where the floor was tiled and much cooler than the living room carpet and laid down on that instead. “This isn’t what I meant and you know it” Razz said, having followed me into the kitchen apparently. “Why are you so useless today anyways? Not like it’s uncommon, but you act as if you’re dying from a little heat.” Razz asked, moving away from me and towards the fridge. I relished the cool breeze that swept over me from it.  


“A little heat?” I asked back, hoping to delay Razz from closing the fridge for as long as possible. It really was the only thing to cool me off since we didn’t have a/c. Then again I could go outside and hose myself down. _Wait, mom and dad have a pool._ I realized, pushing myself up quickly. Razz closed the fridge and looked back at me, watching as I ran out of the room and up to my own room. I rummaged in my closet, hoping to spend as little time in my room as possible since it was even hotter than downstairs, and took out my bathing suit.  


“where ya goin, sweetness?” Syrup asked as I ran back down the stairs, bathing suit in hand. Even though it seemed like he and Razz weren’t too affected by the heat, they weren’t wearing their normal clothing either. Instead Syrup was dressed in a white t-shirt and black cargo shorts with untied converse on his feet and Razz was dressed in a black and red t-shirt (that he had tied up to expose his lower spine) with a red bandanna and his usual black shorts and purple boots.  


“My parents have a pool and I think it’s perfect for this kind of weather.” I told him, stopping at my bag and searching for my phone.  


“A pool?” Razz asked, coming out of the kitchen with a cold drink in his hands. I think it was just water, but it was hard to tell with all the condensation on the outside of the opaque cup.  


“Yeah, a thing filled with a bunch of water.” I explained distractedly, dialing my mom’s number and holding my phone up to my ear.  


I talked with my mom and learned she and dad had gone out for the day. She told me I could use the pool as long as I locked the house back up after I left. I promised I would and hung up with her. “Alright, I’m going to spend the day at my parent’s house! See you guys!” I said, grabbing my bag, shoving my sneakers on my feet, and ready to run out the door.  


“Trying to leave us to suffer, human?” Razz asked, studying me.  


“I thought you said it was only a ‘little bit of heat’, Razz” I retorted, throwing open the door and letting in more hot air.  


He narrowed his sockets at me. “Lead the way”  


I rolled my eyes as I left the house, two skeletons following after me once we had locked up. It wasn’t a terribly long walk to my parent’s house, but the sun beating down on me sure didn’t help. I was sweating by the time we got there and I noticed Syrup wasn’t in a much better boat than I was. For some reason, Razz seemed virtually unaffected in this, though I did catch the occasional bead of sweat that was quickly swiped away.  


I found the spare key and unlocked the door to my parent’s house, it just as sweltering inside as it was outside. I went around and started opening windows and turning on fans while Razz wandered into the kitchen and Syrup looked around, closing the door behind us. I had forgotten Syrup had never actually been inside my parent’s house before. 

“Yeah, this is my old house. I used to live here with my parents pretty much until I fell Underground and started living with you two.” I told him, pushing another window open and pulling the blinds down halfway to block out some sun.  


“it’s nice” Syrup said, sockets taking everything in. I noticed he hadn’t moved from the doorway.  


“Take a look around if you want. There’s only bedrooms and a bathroom upstairs, so you won’t see much if you go up there, but pretty much everything else is down here. Living room, kitchen, etc.” I said, gesturing around. “I’m going to go change so I’ll be back down in a minute” I said. Syrup nodded and moved further into the house, looking around as I grabbed my bathing suit and went upstairs.  


I bounded back down the stairs when I had changed, having left my clothes in the bathroom since no one else would be using it. I grabbed a towel from a closet, making a mental note to leave it here later, and ran to the back door. I threw the door open, heard a commotion from the kitchen, and threw my towel onto the railing of the deck, seeing the pool glistening within sight. I jumped in and was immediately pleased with my decision to come and swim. _My one and only savior._  


I popped back up and smiled widely at the two skeletons watching me in confusion. “What are you doing?” Razz asked, moving cautiously towards the pool and me.  


“Swimming, nerd, what does it look like?” I retorted sarcastically, deciding to float on my back. Razz glowered at me. “It feels awesome. I know you’re both overheating too, don’t even try and lie to me. So, even though I don’t know how you don’t know what a pool or swimming is, you should at least put your feet in.” I told the two, waving to Syrup for him to come closer as well. He shrugged and kicked off his shoes, bony feet clicking against the plastic boards that made up the small deck.  


Syrup sat on the edge of the pool and swung his legs over into the pool, a content expression crossing his face as he lay back with his arms under his skull against the deck. I chuckled at Syrup’s immediate laziness, his sockets already closed and his grin stretching upwards. I then noticed a distinct lack of another skeleton and looked around curiously, spotting the short skeleton at the far end of the deck near the back door, lacking his bandanna and boots. I saw the determined look on his face just as he pushed off into a sprint towards the pool. I only had time enough time to backpedal a few strokes before Razz jumped into the pool, drenching Syrup and me with a large splash.  


Syrup sat up, dripping and just as curious as I was when Razz didn’t come up after a moment. As the bubbles cleared, we saw him sitting at the bottom of the pool with his arms crossed and a sour look on his face. “Can-” I started, looking to Syrup and then back down to Razz. I looked at Syrup again. “Can you guys not float?” I asked, struggling to hold back my laughter.  


Syrup shrugged. “we are made of bone”  


I snorted, Syrup grinning and not seeming to be too worried about his brother who was stuck at the bottom of the pool. _I mean, it’s not like skeletons need to breathe. We could just leave him there and he’d be fine._ I thought, laughing harder at the image I was creating. My parents would probably kill me if they came home and had to fish a waterlogged skeleton out of their pool.  


I felt something grab my leg and I inhaled sharply before I was tugged underwater. I squinted my eyes open and glared at the smirking skeleton who still had a bony hand clasped around my ankle. I tugged on my ankle and Razz shook his head, nodding upwards. So he wanted a rescue. _Of course._ I pried myself from his grip and shot above water, breathing in deeply and diving back under. I swam down and wrapped an arm around his midsection, pushing upwards and surfacing again. “No more deep water for you” I said, earning a shrug from the smirking skeleton as I swam him to land.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to get these out of the way, honestly (not best quality, but eh). I have a few longer things that I'll post later on, but for now, here ya go!


	9. The Fallen Human

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter gets a little dark. If you are uncomfortable with mentions of suicide, etc, please don't read.
> 
> This chapter takes place while journeying back to the Underground to re-explore it. This chapter takes place in 3rd person.

There was a scream from the very beginning of the Ruins. “What is it?!!” Razz yelled out, bursting into the cave like area first, Syrup right on his heels and looking worried. There was something curled up in a corner of the cave, cast in shadows, that was unmoving and giving off an awful stench. Razz’s and Syrup’s human was whimpering in the opposite corner, tears streaming down her face and body shaking violently as she tried to collapse into herself. This was so very unlike her that both monsters were immediately on high alert.  


“sweetness, what is it?” Syrup asked, moving over to the girl and crouching beside her. Razz stayed at the doorway, watching the thing in the corner warily. The girl flinched away from his touch, her shaking getting more violent as she shook her head, muttering something incomprehensible.  


“What is she saying?” Razz demanded to know. He spared a quick glance at the two before his eye lights shot back to the thing in the corner.  


“i don’t know” Syrup said, rubbing the girl’s back in slow circles. “sweetness, please, what’s wrong?” He asked her gently, not getting a response. She seemed numb to what was around her, eyes staring into the distance as tears streamed down her face and dampened her jeans.  


Razz growled, frustrated with the lack of response his human was providing. “Snap out of it! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” He shouted at her, glaring. She seemed to snap out of her daze, eyes moving slowly towards Razz. Both monsters noticed how she avoided looking at the corner. She shuddered violently.  


“They were only a kid” She whispered, so quietly even Syrup, who was right next to her, had trouble hearing it.  


Syrup snapped his gaze back to the corner, a terrible feeling creeping down his spine. “What?” Razz hadn’t heard and was angry he wasn’t a part of this revelation.  


“it’s a human” Syrup told him, voice lowered and almost terrified.  


“Why is a human down here?” Razz asked, sockets narrowed towards the corner. “And why isn’t it moving?”  


“They jumped” The girl spoke up, loudly enough that both could hear her. Her shaking had slowed but she would not look at the figure cast in shadow. “Ebott was always known as a place where people would commit suicide. No one comes up here who hasn’t at least considered it.”  


“What?!” Both monsters stared at her, aghast.  


She began shaking again. “It was one of my lowest moments, things weren’t going well and I decided to come up here. I wasn’t actually going to do it, I’ve always been too much of a coward, but I fell anyways, it was more of an accident than purposefully.” She told the two, hugging her knees and avoiding looking at them. “But, not everyone is as lucky as I was. Or maybe to them, I was the unlucky one.” She whispered, resting her head against her knees. “But they were too young. They-” She choked up, gripping her legs tightly as fresh tears fell down her face. “They were only a kid. Nothing should have been that bad for them yet.”  


“sweetness, why didn’t you tell us?” Syrup asked her quietly, pulling her into a warm hug and wrapping his jacket around her.  


“Because…” The girl took a shuddering breath. “When I fell I realized that there was a lot more that I wanted to do with my life. Those bad things I was facing were just points in time, they would pass eventually, and they have, and if I hadn’t made it, or chosen to jump on my own, I might not have met all of you guys.” She said, tearing up and gripping Syrup’s arm like it was a lifeline. Razz was silent throughout the explanation, seeming to be in a daze until his human looked over to him, startling him as she smiled weakly at him and his brother. “Thank you guys.”  


“for what, sweetness?” Syrup and Razz were confused as she wiped at her eyes and smiled.  


“For everything. For greeting me in the woods when I first came out of the Ruins. For fighting me and trying to bring my SOUL to Toriel. For taking me on an awkward first date. For making me stay with you when we got to the Surface. For caring about me. Just, thank you”  


There was silence for a moment. “You’re such a weird creature” Razz said, cheek bones sporting a light purple as he huffed and looked away from the girl. Syrup only hugged her tighter, nuzzling her hair affectionately.  


“I know” She chuckled, eyes still watery as she smiled at nothing.  


“Now, as much as I don’t want to, we need to bring them somewhere proper.” She broke the silence, avoiding looking at the crumpled figure in the corner. “We can’t just leave them here.” She said quietly, shaking against Syrup who hugged her closer and shushed her.  


“it’s okay, sweetness, i’ll handle it.” Syrup told her, resting his chin on her head comfortingly. He looked over to his brother. “sans, can you go with her back to the house? i’ll be back later” Syrup asked, arms loosening from around their human as he stood, leaving his coat with her. Razz nodded and stuck a hand out for the girl, her taking it and pulling herself up from the ground before letting go and wrapping the large coat closer to herself. She swiped at her eyes, nodded to Syrup, and left with Razz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, uh, yeah, this kinda happened. I wrote this a while ago when I was still deciding on the backstory of OC/Reader and was trying to decide why Chara/Frisk was never in the universe.
> 
> Please remember that there are always people who care about you!


	10. Paintball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The universes get together for some paintball fun. Who will win?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, okay, I suck at names so whenever you see -- then that's like, OC/Reader's name (you can insert your own or whatever you want to). 
> 
> If you think I should change the -- to something like [Y/N] then let me know!

“LET’S GO PLAY PAINTBALL!” It was an innocent suggestion from Papyrus that the others all agreed to. I had been dragged into it by Razz and my own curiosity. Now we were in teams, running around the forest and trying to steal one another’s flags. Ink, of course, had been more than happy to provide the paint for the guns and paintbrushes after some brief discussion on if they should be allowed as knives or not. Now everyone not only had their gun of choice but a paintbrush for closer attacks as well. Because of this, a revival system had been implemented as well. Everyone was given a small water bottle and, if they could wash the paint off a fallen friend, they could get back in the game. Of course, this didn’t make the reviver or revivee safe, and the paint wasn’t guaranteed to come off either, so it was risky business.  


We were put on teams, deciding to play a game of capture the flag first, and both teams went in opposite directions. I was on the blue team with Blue, Syrup, Papyrus, Sans, and Fell. The red team consisted of Red, Ink, Error, Razz, and Honey. Since I had basically been the extra person, they let me choose which team I wanted to play for. The red team had been pretty confident they’d win with or without the extra person anyways.  


“We should go put it up in that tree” I suggested, having gotten far enough away from the other group now.  


“I THINK WE SHOULD PUT IT IN THAT TREE” Fell said, pointing to a different tree right next to the one I suggested. I rolled my eyes and agreed just so the other team wouldn’t find us all standing around arguing where to put the stupid flag. We had only been given ten minutes to prepare before we could go hunting for the other team.  


Fell scaled the tree and tied our blue flag up as high as possible before dropping back down with a satisfied smirk. We didn’t have to wait too much longer before the ten minutes was up and we all scattered.  


I spotted Ink from a distance. He seemed to be scheming. I aimed and shot at him, my paintballs exploding against a nearby tree. Ink jumped and looked at me with wide eyes. He ducked under a few more of my shots and ran into the trees, disappearing from my view. I ran after him, but couldn’t find him again. I cursed and ended up meeting with Syrup who had also been on the artist’s trail. We traveled together for a little while.  


Syrup made a choked sound as a paintball exploded on his throat. He fell to the ground, paint gun clattering next to him. “No, Syrup!” I cried out, dodging more paintballs and ducking behind a tree. “We need backup! We need backup!” I shouted, readying my own gun and peaking out from behind the tree. There was no one there.  


“sorry, kid” Honey said from right behind me. I ducked just as a paintball exploded on Honey’s skull. We both looked to see Blue grinning widely. Honey fell dramatically to the ground at my feet, blue paint dripping down his skull.  


“Thanks, Blue” I sighed in relief, stepping over Honey’s corpse and leaving the tree behind.  


“No problem, human!” He replied, voice lowered as he grinned. “Do you know how many they have left?” He asked, his eyes wandering over to Syrup, whose collar had been stained. There was no way he’d be able to be revived. “And how many we have left?”  


I shook my head. “I don’t know. I came across Ink earlier, but he got away. Honey was the only other one I’ve seen killed. As for our team I only know that we lost Syrup.” I said, following after the skeleton as we walked further into the woods. We killed two more of the enemy team, Error who hadn’t seemed to want anything to do with the game anyways, and Red who we snuck up on. We had yet to find their flag anywhere.  


“Go on without me!” I cried, falling to my knees. I had been sneak attacked, my throat getting slit with a paintbrush.  


“Mwah hah hah” Razz laughed evilly as he pushed me over. He dodged a paintball sent whizzing towards him and sent a few back. “Come out, Blue. You know you do not stand a chance against the maleficent Sans.” Razz taunted, a boot placed firmly on my back between my shoulder blades. Luckily Blue had managed to find decent cover to avoid getting killed like I had.  


“I think you do not stand a chance against the magnificent Sans!” Blue called back, hidden somewhere about twenty feet away.  


“We’ll see about that” Razz replied, his boot lifting from my back as he stalked away to go find Blue. When he was just rounding a corner, I heard rustling in the brush to my side. I saw blue boots enter my vision as Blue crouched down in front of me, placing his gun on the ground.  


“Do not worry, human, I have come to rescue you” He whispered to me, looking around before gently turning me over and popping the cap off his water bottle.  


I pushed myself off the ground when Blue had rubbed the paint away and I grabbed my gun. Blue stood as well, picking up his own gun and pulling me along in the opposite direction Razz had gone off in. I followed, listening intently for Razz or anyone else, as we searched for their flag. 

“There it is!” Blue pointed out. I followed his finger to the red flag tied to a low hanging tree limb in a slight clearing. He ran off towards it.  


“Blue, wait! What if it’s a trap?” I yelled out, running after him. He tripped over a thin, almost invisible wire and I heard a creak. We both looked up to see a large balloon come loose from the tree branch right above us.  


“Oh no”  


Blue and I tramped back through the woods, dripping in red paint and leaving a bright trail of where we had been. I would have to throw these clothes out later and I had a feeling Blue would be in a similar boat. We went back to our own ‘base’ where we had hidden our flag and where everyone else was already waiting, many already covered in splotches of either blue or red paint. They cracked up at our drenched, defeated forms. Blue and I shared a glance and we both grinned, trapping and smearing as many of the skeletons as we could with messy hugs.  


By the end of it all, everyone was a colorful mess.

\--

We all got cleaned up to the best of our ability. Like I had thought, much of the paint stained our clothing, turning Blue’s and my outfits to a dull red and leaving everyone with random splotches on their articles of clothing. Thankfully we had thought ahead and everyone wore things they didn’t mind getting rid of. “Free for all time?” Ink asked, his eye lights yellow stars in his sockets as he looked over everyone. As far as I knew, he hadn’t been hit at all in our actual battle phase, but had gotten double teamed by me and Blue and was almost as red as we were.  


“Sure, I’m up for that” I agreed, nodding.  


“YES!” Blue agreed as well, excited.  


“sure” Sans consented.  


“MY CLOTHES ARE ALREADY RUINED” Fell agreed.  


“Whatever” Razz said.  


Error grumbled and everyone else agreed to the free for all.  


“Alright, we’ll have different colors this time. What colors does everyone want?” Ink said, looking at us as we handed him our paintball guns. He had emptied them all out and was looking at us expectantly.  


“BLUE PLEASE” Blue said.  


“Purple I guess” Razz said.  


“ORANGE IS FINE WITH ME” Papyrus said.  


“I’LL GO WITH RED” Fell said.  


“aw, boss”  


“SHUT UP, SANS”  


When everyone had their colors picked, Honey with indigo, Syrup with green, Sans with yellow, Red with black, Error with white, me with pink, and Ink with the ‘multi-ball’ which was all the colors in one paintball, we loaded our guns and set out the rules. They were similar to the capture the flag rules, anything goes, team up at your own will, you can go anywhere within the forest (it wasn’t overly large) so long as you didn’t leave it, and revivals had been canceled since no one would need to be reviving anyone else. You could win either by racking up points by killing the most people, or by being the last man standing. We were given ten minutes to run and hide.  


After a few minutes of walking into the forest, I found myself alone. _Good._ I thought, listening just in case. I knew that Papyrus had run this way, but I had deviated myself enough from his and everyone else’s paths that I thought I’d be on my own for a while. I saw a bolt of red whiz by a few feet away and realized I wasn’t as alone as I had hoped. Oh well. It was probably Blue who had run by and there was still two minutes left to get somewhere. I walked further along and spotted a decently large tree that looked easy enough to climb. There was enough foliage on it that it wasn’t too easy to see into.  


I climbed up the tree, settling into a crook maybe eight feet up. I looked down upon the forest floor, in search of others who might have been near. Time ran out, as was told to me by the alarm on my phone, and I waited.  


After a while I spied movement. It was relatively nearby and the contrasting whites, blacks, and reds of the skeletons battling were hard to miss. Not to mention the shouting going on between who I deemed was Fell and Papyrus. “YOU WILL NOT TAKE ME ALIVE” Fell shouted, sending a volley of paintballs towards Papyrus who dodged behind a tree.  


“YOU’RE RIGHT BECAUSE THAT IS A PART OF THE GAME!” Papyrus called back, peeking out and almost getting shot in the face. As much as I wanted to see how it would play out, I also wanted to win and lined Fell up in my sights first. I held my breath, steadying my aim as he continued to shoot at his counterpart, remaining relatively still since he wasn’t receiving return fire as of yet.  


I pulled the trigger and sent a volley of projectiles his way, half of them nailing him. As he stopped firing, stunned, I lined Papyrus up before either could realize what was happening and had him covered in pink in no time. Both looked towards where I was hidden, Fell in a bit of rage and Papyrus just stunned before they both left towards base, out of the game. “Not bad” I started, looking up quickly and seeing Error hanging in an almost hammock above me that he had made from his strings and attached to a higher branch. His gun was resting next to him as he grinned down at me with his arms behind his head. He didn’t seem like a threat, but I kept my eye on him, not looking away even when I heard a slight commotion a few yards away.  


“How long have you been there?” I asked the glitchy skeleton suspiciously, my gun resting in my arms and providing a comforting weight.  


He shrugged, looking over to where the commotion was. I didn’t move my eyes from him. “Was here since the match started. ‘M surprised you didn’t notice” He said, crossing a leg over his other and letting his slipper hang precariously over the edge of the hammock. He reminded me oddly of the Cheshire cat. His mismatched eye lights looked back down at me. “I’m not gonna do anything ya know. Just thought I’d warn ya about Ink. Bastard’s been plantin traps everywhere. I know you and Blue got caught by his last one, so you might want to watch where you’re going this time if you don’t want to get covered again.” He told me, eye lights studying me as I finally let my gaze slip to the commotion a little ways away. It seemed Razz had found Red and both were giving it their all. Red seemed to have a slight advantage with his ability to teleport, but Razz was no idiot by any means.  


I studied the surrounding forest before looking back to Error who met my gaze with his own. “There’s no way Ink got around the entire forest to trap it so quickly. I haven’t even seen him” I said, not quite believing Ink would have time to rig up multiple traps in such a short amount of time without getting caught.  


“You’d be surprised how quickly he can move around when he wants to” Error said, shrugging and not seeming to care whether I believed him or not. I heard a curse from Red before something snapped. I looked back over to where Razz and Red were now covered in a multitude of different paints, dripping with the stuff. The two begrudgingly trekked back to base. Error shrugged when I looked back to him.  


I stayed in the tree a little while longer, looking out for any more skeletons who might decide to adventure towards my area. None came by and I wondered what I should do about Error. He hadn’t put up a fight at all, hadn’t even touched his gun or made to paint me, but I also didn’t want anyone else to get points by hitting him. I narrowed my eyes at him, contemplating. “Here” I said, taking a paintball from my gun and handing it to him. He raised a brow at me, rolling the little pink ball in his palm. “If you see Ink or anyone else and don’t want them getting you, you might as well give the points to me” I said, grinning. “Think of it as one of those cyanide pills” I winked, capping off my gun again and jumping down from the tree.  


I traversed the forest floor, ears open for the slightest noise that might hint at someone hiding or coming my way and eyes peeled for any traps Ink may have set. I had no idea who was left in the game. I heard a stick snap and whipped to face it, gun drawn and aimed. I took my paintbrush into my other hand and held it facing backwards. “we’re just destined to meet up like this, huh, kid?” Honey’s voice, as predicted, came from right behind me. I swung my brush in an upwards arc before turning to face him.  


“And I guess you’re destined to fail each time” I replied, grinning at the stunned look on his face. Since I wasn’t as tall as him, his face had gotten spared, but there was a long line of pink right up the middle of his sweatshirt.  


“So, do you have any details on who’s left in the game?” I asked him, putting the paintbrush away and lowering my gun. I kept my ears open.  


Honey blinked away his shock. “heh, not sure, kid. i got sans out a little while ago, took me forever. i saw razz and red drenched in ink’s colors too, but other than that, i’m not sure. best of luck” He said, winking at me and leaving back for base. I heard a paintball whiz by my ear and whipped around to face it. Honey chuckled. “i mighta teamed up with someone, too” He said before promptly vanishing. _Bastard._ I thought, ducking behind some trees as paintballs continued to whiz through the air around me.  


A paintball splashed on the tree next to me, marking it a bright green. _Oh shit, Syrup had green, didn’t he?_ I realized, cursing quietly and firing off a few shots of my own. I wondered when he’d teleport. The branches above me creaked and I rolled to the side as paintballs exploded on the ground where I had been standing. _I guess that answers that._ I fired up into the trees and ducked behind a rock. A few paintballs splattered on the rock and I fired back. Both Syrup’s and my guns clicked, empty. “shit” I heard him curse. I pulled my paintbrush out as Syrup jumped down from the trees, his own brush in his hand and his sockets narrowed towards me. I narrowed my eyes back and dropped my gun, waiting.  


Syrup lunged for me. I ducked and stuck a foot out, tripping him up. He landed on the ground with a thud and I didn’t give him time to get back up as I slashed the back of his neck, painting it a bright pink. “nyeh heh, good job, sweetness. i’ll be on my way to the afterlife now. i think i saw ink planting a trap near base. be careful.” Syrup told me, pushing himself up and ruffling my hair. He grabbed his gun from the ground, winked at me, and disappeared.  


I took my own gun up, digging in my pockets and finding a case of extra paintballs Ink had given us all. There weren’t many, maybe twenty of them, but I was hoping they’d get me to victory. I counted my victims in my head and decided that I needed at least one more, two to ensure victory if Error didn’t take my offer. _Wait, how many people are even left? Honey said he got Sans, and Ink got Razz and Red, then I got Honey, Syrup, Fell, and Papyrus and possibly Error, depending, so that only leaves Blue and Ink left. If Ink got Error and Blue then we’d be at a tie and he’d only have to kill me to win and be the last standing._  


I heard a trap go off near me and an ‘uh-oh’ from Blue. Well, I guess he was out of the game then. If I could just find Ink… “Heya, --” _Speak of the devil._ I turned my attention upwards where Ink was hanging from a tree branch, smiling down at me. He didn’t have his gun, but I saw a few balloons on his sash and realized what he was using to set his traps with. He dropped from the tree and landed on his feet, standing up straight and cracking his knuckles in front of him almost boredly. “Since you’re the last one left, I think it’s time I won” He said, grinning as he unhooked a balloon from his sash.  


I ducked under the projectile and fired a few rounds towards him, ducking behind some trees. Ink chuckled, too close, and a balloon whizzed by me, splattering on the ground a few feet away. I ran.  


I didn’t realize I was close to base as Ink chased after me, his balloons seemingly endless as they painted the forest in a menagerie of colors around me. I spotted everyone else in the clearing, milling around and chatting with each other, some dripping more paint than others. I bolted around the area, getting a few people’s attention as Ink started cackling. “look out!” Syrup gave the warning too late as I triggered a wire. Ink was right behind me as a paletteful of colors came crashing down on us.  


I spluttered, wiping the multi-colored paint off of my face and away from my eyes, nose, and mouth. Ink shook himself off, splattering me with more paint before he spat out a large glob of the stuff. He looked at me with starred eye lights. “Good game” He said, smiling genuinely and holding a paint covered hand out to me.  


I smiled back and shook it. “You too”  


“So who won?” Razz asked as we all attempted to clean ourselves off. He, Red, and Blue, as well as Ink and myself were all covered in multi-colored paint. My own victims had pink streaks or splatters on them and Sans had quite a few green and indigo splatters staining his t-shirt and arms.  


“Obviously I did. I was the last standing and I got the most kills” Ink boasted.  


“No way, I got four, maybe five people. At the very least we tied for kills” I said, looking around for Error who had disappeared from the group. “Where is Error?”  


“Oh, I already got him” Ink said, grinning as I continued searching for the glitchy skeleton.  


“That’s a lie and you know it” Error said, returning from the woods. He had multi-colored paint splattered over his right shoulder and down his shirt.  


“Nuh-uh, look, that’s mine right there” Ink said, pointing to Error’s shoulder with a pout.  


“And pink was the human’s color, was it not?” Error asked, a sly grin on his face as he opened his left palm to reveal it had been completely covered in pink paint. “She got to me before you did, _Inky._ ” Ink huffed and crossed his arms, turning away from Error who shot me a wink behind his back. I grinned and winked back, wiping away some paint from my arms.  


“Well, I guess we both won then.” Ink said, demeanor changing to bubbly once again as he smiled. “We should all play again sometime!”  


Everyone agreed that we would have to play again. We all had a lot of fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh, eleven people for a paintball game just doesn't seem like enough. I wish I could've added more in but I'm too lazy to write more characters. Hope you enjoyed my randomness anyways and sorry if Error seemed OOC, I just felt like making him like that. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	11. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We all have nightmares. Some are worse than others.

_“so, human” The word was said with disdain. He wasn’t looking at me. He was turned away. The room was brimming with powerful magic. Possibly some of the most powerful I had felt so far. I was scared. “you’ve almost made it. to the end. what are you going to do after this? if you survive, that is. and i fully intend for you not to” He said, turning to face me, absolute hatred visible on his face. He despised me. I didn’t know if I blamed him.  
_

_“I don’t know” I answered truthfully.  
_

_“then what did you make this journey for?” He spat at me.  
_

_“To befriend everyone” I answered. I thought ‘befriend’ might be a bit much, but it seemed to be working so far. I left out that the reason behind my journey was because I was spurred by the need to prove his brother wrong.  
_

_“you’re an idiot then” He scoffed, crossing his arms and looking down on me.  
_

_“It’s worked so far” I pointed out. He said nothing. The battle began.  
_

I woke slowly from my dream ( _memory_ ), unsure what had brought me back to the waking world in the middle of it. I didn’t know why I had that dream, I had long since disregarded what had happened in the Underground, as almost every other monster had done too. When we reached the Surface, we had all agreed not to speak of what had happened under that mountain and, despite nearly every news reporter and government official trying to get information from us, there was nothing about what had happened that we had shared with them. They were left to explore the Underground and try to guess what went on, but they would never know.  


I heard whimpering from Syrup’s room, low and fearful. I realized what had woken me up. I got out of my bed, blinking tiredly and dragging my blanket and pillow out of my room with me. I walked to Syrup’s door and twisted the knob, pushing it quietly open. My eyes adjusted easily to his slightly darker room and I looked over to where Syrup was on his bed, his blankets wrapped around him as he fought against them, only tightening their hold. I blinked again and went over to him, putting my pillow and blanket on the bed next to him and putting a comforting hand on his shoulder. I felt the sweat on him.  


Syrup calmed, slowing in his thrashing and reaching blindly for me. I removed my hand and his face became distraught as he desperately tried to seek me out. I gently unraveled him from his covers and fixed them over him. I put my own blanket over the top and moved my pillow up next to Syrup’s head and needy hands. He felt it and pulled it into him, expression relaxing and a slight smile over his teeth. I sighed and gently pried it from him, his smile turning to a frown and his hands searching for it again. I gently pushed his hands away and put my pillow back down next to him.  


I crawled under the covers and yawned as Syrup’s hands found me and wrapped around my midsection. He buried his face in my neck, his SOUL thrumming softly to its own song. I smiled, already drifting off again with the warm, familiar feeling of Syrup’s magic and presence against me.

\--

I woke groggily, blinking the bleariness out of my eyes as my sleep was interrupted in the middle of the night again. I listened for a moment and didn’t hear anything, wondering why my body did this to me. I turned over and was about to fall back asleep when I heard fast, hyperventilated breaths. _From Razz’s room._ Usually Razz wasn’t the one to get nightmares, and if he did he never talked about them or they were never bad enough to wake me up from sleep. I climbed out of bed, dragging my blanket and pillow with me as I walked to Razz’s door. I was glad we had all agreed to leave our doors unlocked. Razz had said it was so if we ever had intruders I could wake either one of them up since I seemed to be the lightest sleeper.  


I pushed Razz’s door open and wandered over to his bed tiredly. He had kicked all of his blankets off and was clutching onto his pillow so tightly I was worried it would tear. He was curled in on himself almost as far as he could be and his sockets were screwed closed with the same amount of force as his grip on his pillow. Razz’s breathing was quick and shallow. “Razz” I spoke quietly, keeping far enough away in case he snapped. It was never a very safe ordeal trying to calm him down from a nightmare. I had almost gotten impaled the last time.  


“Hey, shh, you’re alright. I’m here. Papyrus is in his room. Everything is fine. There’s nothing to be afraid of.” I shushed him. He was still clutching the pillow tightly and his features didn’t soften. I sighed. Despite all common sense, I inched closer to Razz and reached out towards him. As soon as my hand came in contact with his shoulder his eyes snapped open, left one burning with magic. “Shh, you’re fine. I’m here. It’s okay” I spoke quietly, feeling his magic manifesting itself around me. His eye light slid towards me, wide and fearful. Small translucent tears formed in the corners of his sockets. He spun and grabbed onto me, magic dissipating as his body shook.  


“It’s alright. Everything is okay. You’re fine. I’m here. I won’t leave.” I hushed, rubbing Razz’s skull as he cried into my shoulder, claws digging into my sides as he held onto me. “It’s only a bad dream. It’s not real.” I continued my hushed nothings, holding onto Razz lightly and calming him with my perpetual motions. Pretty soon he had stopped crying and I felt his breathing grow more steady. He was still holding onto me, but not with the same force. I looked down at him. His sockets were closed. He had fallen asleep.  


I gently pried myself from Razz’s grasp and fixed the covers around him. I sighed, exhaustion hitting me full force, and sat down on the ground against Razz’s bed. I arranged my pillow and blanket on the floor next to it and was about to lay down when a bony hand stopped me. I looked up at Razz, who was awake again and looking at me worriedly as he held my arm. He pulled lightly on my arm when he saw he had my attention and shifted away from the edge a little, still keeping his grip on me.  


I sighed and grabbed my pillow and blanket with my free hand, placing both on the bed when Razz moved over. I crawled under my blanket and pushed my pillow upwards before flopping tiredly onto it. Razz smiled lightly and laid back down next to me. I fell asleep to the soft glow of Razz’s eye lights and the quiet thrumming of his SOUL.


	12. Roadtrip! Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Am I going to write an arc that actually has a consecutive story? The answer to that is no. Will we get to see where this road trip goes? The answer to that is also no (It's the journey that matters! Not the destination!). This is just an excuse to make more shorts that seem to make sense in the context of a road trip. Sorry not sorry.

“Roadtrip!” I shouted, cramming my things into the back of my van along with everyone else’s.  


“We know, you’ve shouted that about a million times already” Razz grumbled as Papyrus and Blue cheered happily.  


“ARE WE ALMOST READY TO GO, HUMAN?” Papyrus asked me, hands clapping together as he smiled widely.  


“Pretty sure!” I told him, smiling widely back, the excitement infecting. “Everyone’s got their stuff, right?” I asked, doing a quick once over of my own items, seeing that I did have everything.  


“I BELIEVE SO!” Papyrus said, nodding as he performed his own inspection of the bags. “SANS! IS EVERYONE READY TO GO OVER THERE?” Papyrus asked his brother. Since four universes and nine people were going on this road trip, instead of cramming everyone into my van it had been decided we would split up. So five, including myself, were going in my car, and four were going in the other.  


“think so bro” Sans replied, yawning and giving the things in the trunk of the other car a cursory glance.  


“WELL HURRY UP THEN” Fell called from the back seat of the smaller car grumpily. Yeah, I was glad I hadn’t gotten stuck with him or Red. Instead I had my own co-pilot, Razz, and the four others, Syrup, Papyrus, Blue, and Ink.  


“Wait, Ink when did you get here?” I asked, doing a double take on the colorful skeleton who had just shown up out of nowhere.  


The artist shrugged, a grin on his teeth. “Thought I’d tag along” Was the only explanation he offered.  


I rolled my eyes. At least I have room in my van. Razz scoffed. “You can’t just show up out of nowhere and expect to tag along. If you wanted to come you should have told us in advance like everyone else.”  


“RAZZ, THERE’S ROOM IN THE VAN. CAN’T INK COME WITH US?” Blueberry asked his grumpy alternate, turning on that signature charm of his. _This boy, I swear._ I thought, shaking my head with a smile. I moved over to the other car to make sure they were all okay and ready to go.  


“So, Honey, you’re good to drive long distances, right?” I asked, standing far enough away to avoid his smoke. It would probably be the last one he got in a while, since I was pretty sure Fell forbade any such activity in the car while he was there.  


“yep, just gotta follow the leader. not too hard” Honey said, nodding. “we’re still plannin on stopping to switch out at some point?” He asked, exhaling his smoke away from me.  


“Yeah at some point. We’ll probably have to stop every once in a while since, ya know, human needs and garbage, not to mention food at some point, so you can switch out whenever you feel like it. I know I’m planning on driving until maybe dinner time so Syrup can drive until midnight or so.”  


“huh, okay, sounds good to me, kid. try not to lose me” He said, winking and ruffling my hair. I rolled my eyes with a smile and went back to my own car.  


“Alright! Everyone in! We’re hitting the road!” I shouted, clapping my hands loudly and getting everyone’s attention.  


“WHY WOULD YOU HIT THE ROAD?” Blue asked, looking down at the pavement in confusion.  


“It’s just an expression, Blue” I told him, opening my door and sliding into my seat.  


“OH” Blue got in as well, taking one of the middle seats. Ink and Syrup climbed into the far back and Papyrus took the other middle seat, closing the sliding door behind him. Razz took the passenger seat and closed his door. Buckles clicked as I started the car.  


I waited until I got the thumbs up from Honey to pull out of the driveway and get on our way. Honey followed behind and we were on the road.  


“HUMAN, I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WORE GLASSES” Blue observed, breaking the slightly awkward silence that had settled over the car.  


“WHAT DO YOU WEAR THEM FOR?” Papyrus asked, also seeming interested in the subject.  


“They’re mainly for distance. My right eye isn’t too great but my left is fine so I don’t wear them too often.” I explained, tapping the frame on my right side for emphasis. “I probably should wear them more, but it’s easy to forget them since I don’t have to wear them all the time”  


“Doesn’t Red wear reading glasses?” Ink spoke up, thoughtful as he remembered this tidbit I had never been privy to before.  


“Oohhhh? Do tell us more, Inky.” I said, happily getting information for blackmail as Ink just as happily spilled it to us.  


\--  


I threw my flippers and goggles down near the edge of the hotel pool. It was decently late out, maybe 11:00 o’clock or so, and after a long day of driving everyone was happy to relax. And, luckily, we had the entire outdoor pool to ourselves.  


Honey was relaxing on one of the long beach chairs left out by the hotel, his legs hanging off the end and feet touching the concrete anyways. Syrup had also taken to relaxing on the ground, a towel keeping him just off the concrete and giving him more room to stretch out than Honey had, not that Honey was complaining. Fell, too, was sitting on one of the beach chairs, though he didn’t seem nearly as relaxed as his counterparts as he watched everything with that half-glare that always seemed to be on his face. Meanwhile, Red had found the hot tub and continued to try and wave me over to it, only to have a rather mischievous Ink join him instead, much to Red’s chagrin and my amusement.  


Meanwhile, Sans was actually in the pool on a tube he got from somewhere (I’m pretty sure he stole it from a convenience store) with his trunks on and sunglasses taped to his skull despite it being nighttime. Did I mention half of these nerds didn’t even bring bathing suits? Ink was very nearly fully clothed (only lacking his scarf, shoes, and sweatshirt) as he bothered Red in the hot tub. Red did have his own swimming trunks on, thank god, because I didn't doubt for a second that he’d probably go without anything otherwise and I didn’t want to deal with that.  


Honey and Syrup, while not swimming, were in t-shirts and shorts. Fell was a different case, as he was fully outfitted still in his battle body (I don’t know if it’s possible, but I think he’s even more uptight than Razz who has a stick shoved so far up his ass you’d mistake him for a lightning rod). Papyrus and Blue, who were wearing floaties once they had been told skeletons sink in water, also remembered their swimwear and were currently racing each other across the pool. I wasn’t even sure Razz owned swimwear since he had discarded his black and red t-shirt as well as his bandanna and boots by Syrup and had just jumped into the pool with his shorts on. Now he was just kind of patrolling the bottom of the pool for some reason, occasionally freaking Blue or Papyrus out by grabbing onto their legs.  


I grinned, waiting until Razz got to the other side of the pool and Blue and Papyrus were far enough away that I wouldn’t land on either of them before I jumped in. The water was heated just enough not to be too cold, but refreshing. The chlorine was strong in the air as I resurfaced and quickly grabbed my fins and goggles, slipping both on.  


I pushed off the wall, narrowly avoiding getting my leg caught by Razz, and swam quickly away, my flippers easily giving me the advantage. “HUMAN! WELCOME TO THE POOL!” Papyrus greeted me as I neared him and Blue.  


“Hey thanks Papyrus. It’s nice, huh?” I greeted back, smiling lightly and treading water.  


“INDEED! BLUE AND I WERE JUST ABOUT TO RACE AGAIN! WOULD YOU LIKE TO JOIN?” He asked, sockets sparkling excitedly. Blue lit up at the idea, his eye lights turning to stars as he nodded, encouraging me to join in the idea.  


“Sure, why not? Are flippers okay, or no?” I asked, swimming closer to them and gripping onto the edge of the pool.  


“FLIPPERS ARE PERFECTLY FINE, HUMAN!” Blue said, smiling. “YOU WILL STILL HAVE TO WORK HARD TO BEAT US THOUGH!” _Ooh, is that a challenge?_ I grinned at the idea and nodded.  


“I’ll do my best” I said. Both were happy to hear it.  


“SANS! WILL YOU COUNT US DOWN?” Papyrus yelled across the pool to his brother who was floating near the edge of the other side. Sans’s head tilted towards us and his permanent grin stretched wider.  


“sure, bro. ready?” Sans said, loud enough for us to hear him. We all braced ourselves against the wall, getting into preferred starting positions. “on your mark. set. go”  


And we were off. Both Papyrus and Blue took off immediately, hardly using the wall to their advantage and relying more on hard paddling to get to their destination. They certainly were a force to be reckoned with and if they knew how to use everything to their advantage I certainly wouldn’t have a chance. I ducked under the water and shoved off. I used my legs the most, my arms only to help balance me at first before I began kicking swiftly, my flippered feet providing quite the graceful quickness. I loved the feeling of gliding through the water.  


I saw Razz standing right in my path, a grin on his sharp teeth as he let Blue and Papyrus pass and waited for me. I grinned back and swam straight into him, grabbing onto him and pulling him along with me. It set me back so I wouldn’t win the race, sure, but the look on Razz’s face was priceless as he had realized his imminent doom to the death glare he was now fixing me with. I resurfaced with Razz in tow and took a few good deep breaths. I had been underwater for a while and after racing two of the most energetic skeletons here, my lungs were burning.  


“WOWIE! YOU DID WELL, HUMAN!” Papyrus congratulated me, even though I didn’t technically finish the race.  


“Let me go, trash mammal. I am perfectly capable of handling myself” Razz told me before I got a chance to reply. I rolled my eyes and let him go, watching amusedly as he sunk slowly back down to the bottom of the pool before he walked away.  


“THAT WAS FUN! WE SHOULD RACE AGAIN!” Blue said, his eyes shining as he looked excitedly between Papyrus and me.  


“NYEH! I WOULD LOVE TO! HUMAN, HOW ABOUT YOU?” Papyrus agreed before both turned to me expectantly.  


“No thanks, you guys have fun” I denied, a little tired out from just the one race. “Maybe I’ll join you guys again later if you race again” I said, both agreeing happily to the idea.  


I watched as the two counted themselves down and took off again before I went off on my own. I spotted Sans still on his tube, body relaxed almost into the water as soft snores emanated from him. I also spotted Razz looking up at the tube with a contemplative expression. I chuckled evilly and dove under the water, swimming stealthily towards the tube and the short skeleton plotting under it. I swam by Razz and he looked at me, head tilted slightly. I nodded up towards the tube and he grinned, nodding. I kicked up to the surface, breaking the water quietly and taking a few breaths before going back under, swimming to the bottom of the pool and planting my flippered feet on it. Razz backed away slightly as I looked up, releasing a few bubbles before I pushed upwards.  


I broke the surface and pushed the tube until it capsized, a startled shriek escaping Sans as he went under. He was back up on the edge of the pool in a second, dripping wet and sunglasses askew as he sneezed water out of his nasal cavity. “jeez, kid. that wasn’t very pool of you” He punned, tilting his head and letting water drain from his ear hole as he looked at me with a grin.  


I chuckled, shrugging. “It had to be done.”  


“There is no mercy in the pool!” Razz screeched from right behind me, making my eyes widen as he locked onto my shoulders and dragged me under.  


In the end, I ended up sitting outside of the pool with Sans and the others, especially after having nearly been drowned by Razz. But, overall, it was a good night.  


\--  


“All right! Get up! We’ve got to get on our way if we want to be to the next hotel before midnight!!” I shouted, clapping my hands together loudly. I had already showered and gotten all my own things packed, leaving both Razz and Syrup to sleep a little longer so they wouldn’t complain about me taking forever. We were planning on getting breakfast wherever we could find it, but we would need to leave soon if we wanted to eat and reach the hotel before it got too late.  


“Fuck you” Razz grumbled, chucking one of his pillows at me and covering his skull with the other. It amazed me that he could yell at Syrup and me for being lazy and hard to wake up when he was just as much of a pain in the ass.  


I wordlessly placed the pillow on the bed I had slept on and ripped the covers from the two skeletons. Syrup groaned and attempted to get them back, hands groping blindly for the missing warmth while Razz shot me the deadliest glare I have ever seen. “Get up. You two can sleep in the car because we need to leave soon. I’m going to wake the others and if you’re both not up by the time I get back I’m chucking you out the window.” I warned, very much meaning my threat. I made sure Syrup had heard the threat and, when he blinked groggily at me with a pout, I nodded and left, ignoring Razz’s glare.  


I decided to wake the Fells up first, since they’d be the most annoying other than my own two pains in the ass. I knocked loudly on their room door. “WE’RE AWAKE, WENCH.” Fell yelled through the door, making no move to open it or anything. _That was easier than expected._  


“Alright” I said, rolling my eyes and moving on to the Underswap’s room. I knocked on their door. “It’s time to get up! We need to leave soon!” I called through it.  


“Okay” Blue’s tired voice came through after a few moments more of my pounding. Apparently everyone is getting worn out. “We’ll be ready soon”  


I left their room’s door and moved to the Undertale door. Ink was sharing a room with them since we all deemed it a waste to get another room and it didn’t seem like Papyrus and Sans minded sharing the room. Syrup and Razz had been a bit harder to convince on the idea when they realized I’d be sharing a room with them, but they had also refused to let me bunk with the Underswap brothers when they offered, so I ended up with my own bed. I thought it was a pretty sweet deal.  


“We’re leaving soon! Get your things together!” I called through the door, knocking loudly.  


“CAN DO!” Papyrus responded chipperly.  


“Alright” I said, wondering if it was a Papyrus thing to be awake so early when no one else was. It was funny to think that even Blue and Razz might have retained some of Sans’s laziness. I chuckled at the idea as I made my way back to my own room.  


“Okay! Everyone ready?” I asked, clapping again as our door closed behind us. I had already double checked for anything we might have forgotten and once the room got it’s clean bill of health, we joined the hallway crew. So far in the hallway it was us, Underfell, and Underswap. We were just waiting on Undertale and Ink.  


“if ya mean ready for more sleep, then ya, i’m always ready” Red replied, yawning as he leaned against the wall and fought to keep his sockets open.  


“i second that” Syrup said, stretching his arms above his head and yawning as well. Razz grumbled something and both Underswap brothers seemed to be fighting to keep themselves awake, Blueberry even more so as he tried to act as chipper and excitable as he normally did.  


“what’re ya grumblin fer, razz? thought you liked annoying everyone this early in the morning” Red said, apparently noticing Razz’s grumpy tiredness like I had.  


“Shut up” Razz snapped at him, looking about ready to kill whoever spoke to him next.  


“Ya know, I actually thought of this this morning, but I have a theory about you Sanses.” I said, gaining the attention of the hallway. I smiled. “You know how Sans is lazy and sleeps a lot? And Red isn’t too far off either?” I didn’t need to pause for long to get multiple confused nods and a rolling of red eye lights. “Well, I think that even though Razz and Blue are more or less opposites of the original, they still retained his need for sleep, unlike Papyrus and Fell.” I explained, grinning as an understanding look crossed over Red’s and Syrup’s faces.  


“AW, DARN. I WAS HOPING NO ONE WOULD NOTICE” Blue sighed, grinning nonetheless. “I STILL DON’T THINK I SLEEP AS MUCH AS MY BROTHER, THOUGH!” He said, throwing Honey under the bus just like that. Razz only grumbled further as Syrup chuckled at the realization.  


“nah, i am just a lazybones, after all” Honey agreed, chuckling when Blue glared at him half-heartedly.  


“WELL, I KNEW I WAS SUPERIOR TO THOSE TWO” Fell said, a smug grin on his teeth as he looked specifically at Razz. Razz ignored Fell, grinning when Fell clucked annoyedly. _I’ve taught him so well._  


“SANS! YOU MAY NOT SLEEP IN MY BAG! YOU NEED TO GET UP!” Papyrus yelled as the Undertale’s door flew open, the tall skeleton struggling to drag his bag while Sans lied on top of it, his sockets closed and a shit eating grin on his face.  


“not like i’m that hard to be luggaging around.” Sans said, his grin only widening at Papyrus’s frustrated groan.  


“SANS, I SWEAR!” Papyrus warned, narrowing his sockets towards the unmoving skeleton.  


“what’re ya swearin for, bro?” Sans asked.  


“NYEH!” Papyrus chucked his bag, along with Sans, into the hallway, both just about reaching the other side.  


“I’d give that a seven out of ten. Good form, nice control, but could have put more power into it.” Ink assessed as he sauntered out of the room with nothing but his paintbrush with him. Because he claimed he didn’t need anything else. Everyone had just let it go.  


“eh, i definitely coulda gotten closer to the wall. i think six outta ten” Sans said, not having moved from Papyrus’s bag at all.  


“NYEH” Then another bag, probably Sans’s, flew from the room and onto Sans, spilling clothes and condiment bottles everywhere. Red scored a mustard bottle.  


“aw, i was gonna have that” Sans said, shaking clothing from himself and sitting up.  


“you don’t even like mustard” Red said, pointing a finger towards Sans as he popped the cap off the bottle.  


“i enjoy all condiments. i just never mustard up the courage to tell you” Sans punned, grinning as he began putting his things back in his bag haphazardly.  


“heh, well i’m still gonna relish this one” Red said back, chugging the condiment as Fell and Blue groaned.  


When Papyrus had double checked his room and Sans had repacked all of his things, we all went downstairs. I returned the key cards and checked us all out of the hotel while everyone else went out to the cars. The clerk seemed a little relieved that our group was leaving. I tried not to think about it and left for my car.  


I greeted the others in the parking lot, the four in the other car already stuffing their things in the trunk of the sedan while my own group was waiting on me. I unlocked the car and Razz threw open the trunk, taking it upon himself to put everyone’s bags in the back while claiming he couldn’t trust any of us to do it correctly. No one complained and we all piled into the car, getting the a-okay from the others and heading off again.


	13. Roadtrip! Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The other half of my road trip shenanigans. Enjoy!

I heard Don’t Stop Believing by Journey start on the radio. I turned the volume up, the conversations in the back quieting slightly as I tapped along on the steering wheel. “Just a small town girl. Livin’ in a lonely world. She took the midnight train goin’ anywheeere.”  


“Just a city boy.” Ink started singing, harmonizing along with me. “Born and raised in South Detroit. He took the midnight train goin’ anywheree.” I grinned and Razz groaned. I saw the grins on everyone else’s faces in the rearview mirror.  


“A singer in a smokey room. The smell of wine and cheap perfume. For a smile they can share the night. It goes on, and on, and on, and ooon.” We all sang rather terribly. It was more to piss Razz off than anything. His face was a priceless mixture of fury and a need to die when we all held out the ‘night’ as long as possible in all different pitches.

\--

We stopped at a restaurant to eat dinner, still about an hour away from our hotel. I thought we were making great time though, since it was only seven o’clock. It would be great if we got to our hotel by nine or so, depending on how long we take eating. I parked the van, the other car pulling in next to us as we piled out and I locked the doors. We all took the time to stretch out as the others got out of the other car. Fell complained about how lazy his three travel partners were as we walked inside, Honey staying behind to smoke and telling us he’d meet us in there. Red was confused as he told his brother there wasn’t much else to do on a long car ride other than sleep. Fell continued to complain anyways.  


“Oh, I’m sorry, but we don’t serve monsters here” The hostess apologized, not seeming very apologetic as she regarded the group of skeleton monsters waiting a little further away skeptically. She returned her gaze to me.  


“...Okay” I stared at her for a moment before I turned away and went back to my group. It was funny, she had been perfectly willing to serve me, even boasting about the restaurant’s surplus of magical dishes to try, but as soon as she realized I was with actual monsters, she immediately shut me down. _How peculiar._ I rolled my eyes. “C’mon, we’ve got to find somewhere else. This place doesn’t serve monsters” I told the group as I passed them, waving for them to follow along.  


“Of course” Razz grumbled, one of the first to follow. The others soon followed as well, more than one seeming a little indignant at being turned down because of their race. _Not that I blame them._  


“you guys decide to leave edge lord behind?” Honey asked, leaning against his car as he regarded us curiously. He hadn’t been in the restaurant, but an understanding look crossed his face when he noticed the disappointed or angry expressions of some of those present.  


“what’ya mean?” Red asked, confused as he looked around. We all did. There was no Fell to be found. “fuck” Red cursed under his breath.  


I followed Red back into the restaurant, telling the others to stay behind so as hopefully to cause less of a scene than Fell was probably already making. Red flung the doors open and we saw Fell speaking rather loudly and angrily with the hostess. “Listen, _sir_ , we don’t serve monsters here. It isn’t _my_ decision to make whether or not you can be here, it’s the manager’s.” The hostess was just as angry as Fell as she glared at him, not backing down an inch from the intimidating skeleton.  


“THEN LET ME SPEAK TO THIS SO CALLED MANAGER OF YOURS.” Fell demanded, glaring just as harshly back.  


Red made no move to stop his brother so I didn’t either, both of us watching to see how this encounter would play out. Red was, no doubt, just as angry as his brother was, but held himself back. I was waiting for the time when the argument got taken too far. The hostess’s eye twitched, but she called in the manager nonetheless, slamming the phone down rather violently when she had finished. We waited in tense silence, Fell and the hostess staring each other down with Red backing his brother up. The hostess glanced over at the shorter skeleton before her eyes landed on me, narrowing immediately. I raised my brows and she huffed, turning her glare to a wall as we waited for the manager.  


“What is taking so long, trash mammal? I expected you, at the very least, not to get caught up in whatever ridiculous scheme Fell had planned out. But I see I was wrong and now we are waiting on all three of you.” Razz said, entering the restaurant. He narrowed his eyes at me when I shrugged before noticing the glare the hostess was giving him. “Oh, so the other worthless human thought it a wise idea to continue their racist ideals. Of course, like I expect much more out of your race.” Razz said, rolling his eye lights. The woman scoffed and Razz glared back at her. “Oh, please, don’t even pretend to be offended. You couldn’t care less about what monsters think of you.”  


The woman didn’t say anything as a man in the restaurant’s uniform came around the corner, a determined stride in his walk. “The manager, _sir_.” The hostess spat venomously, glaring at all of us before returning it to Fell.  


“THANK YOU.” Fell replied, his voice icy as he turned his attention to the man. “I WAS TALKING WITH YOUR… _STAFF_ ” The woman glowered but said nothing. “AND WAS INFORMED YOU DID NOT SERVE MONSTERS. WHY IS THAT?” Fell’s voice was dangerous as he addressed the stoic looking manager who hadn’t even flinched at the tall skeleton’s demeanor.  


“Because, sir, we don’t specialize in monster food and therefor have nothing to serve our monster patrons. I apologize for the inconvenience and for any unpleasant experiences you may have had here, but I would politely ask you leave before you stir up more of a…” The manager trailed off, glancing around at the other human customers. Many of their eyes were on us and the noise level in the restaurant had significantly decreased. “...scene.” The manager finished, looking back to us.  


_Oh no, I am not letting this bullshit slide._ Fell huffed and seemed to be ready to accept the man’s word, even Red and Razz looking just a bit less irritated. But, oh boy, I was on an entirely different level of furious. “Yeah, excuse me” I spoke up, fuming as I pushed my way towards the man, surprising all three skeletons.  


The man tilted his head towards me with a disinterested look. “May I help you?”  


“I think you could. I was told that this restaurant served and boasted it’s multiple magical dishes." I didn’t need to turn to see the re-ignited rage of the skeletons present. “So what I would like to know is why you still insist on not serving monsters.”  


The manager blinked at me, seeming mildly taken aback by my knowledge before he looked over to the guilty looking hostess. “We will have a talk later” He said. He turned back to me, a slight, cruel smile on his face. “Now, you asked why we do not serve monsters here, despite our magical dishes. That is quite simple. We can’t have our other patrons scared off by their kind. You see, most of our well paying regulars strongly oppose the integration of the monsters, so we do as well. That is not to mention monsters’ terrible habits of always being so kind, it becomes increasingly difficult to tell them to get lost.” He told me, smile twitching upwards before I punched him square in the jaw.  


The hostess gasped in surprise as the manager stumbled back, a hand going to his injured face in shock before fury clouded his expression. “You’re lucky you were born into our race, girl, otherwise I may have to teach you a lesson about respecting those superior to you. Now, leave my restaurant and never show your faces here again.” He hissed at me.  


“You really think so, huh?” I asked, cracking my knuckles and glaring at the man. “I think you’re the one who needs a lesson. And what better time to learn it than now?”  


A sharp grip yanked me away from the man just as I was about to end him. I hissed as Razz’s claws dug into my arm and he pulled me out of the restaurant, Red and Fell following just behind us. They were silent as we went back to the cars, Razz still not releasing me and his grip bruising. The others all had questioning looks on their faces but didn’t dare voice them as Razz shoved me into the back seat of the car and held his hand out for my keys. I dug them out of my pocket and slapped them into his palm, neither of us speaking as he left the car again and tossed them to Syrup. No one needed to be told and everyone piled into their respective cars. Everyone was eerily silent on the ride to the hotel. I don’t think anyone thought about food for the rest of the night.

\--

I woke with a start, heart racing and my mind muddled. I was cold and clammy. Whatever nightmare had just awoken me already escaped me, but it was a bad one. I sighed, a shudder racing through my body as I laid back down. I felt something cold on my cheeks and raised a hand to feel what it was. It came away wet. Apparently it had been pretty bad.  


I knew I wouldn’t be able to fall asleep again, but, looking around the still nearly pitch black room, it was far too early for me not to. I’d be dead tired tomorrow if I didn’t get at least a few more hours of sleep. I sighed and looked at the ceiling anyways, knowing I’d hate myself tomorrow. Hopefully Syrup would be okay with driving.  


I felt a light tap on my arm and started, turning quickly to see Syrup turned towards me, looking at me in concern. I sighed and shook my head, trying to tell him not to worry about it. He tapped me again when I had turned my gaze back upwards and I looked back at him. He waved his hand at me to join him and Razz on their bed. I looked over him at Razz, knowing it was kind of crowded already. I also knew company would be nice, even if Razz killed me in the morning.  


I sighed lightly and dragged myself from bed, tossing the covers down and taking my pillow. Syrup smiled softly at me in the dark and moved closer to the edge of the bed while I traveled to the foot of it. I crawled up the center and put my pillow between his and Razz’s, Syrup pulling the covers down slightly so I could get under before pulling them back up closely beneath our chins. He turned to face me again and smiled goofily. I rolled my eyes and smiled back.  


I woke up again to a dull light streaming in through the not fully drawn blinds and the feeling of two bodies against mine. I was facing towards Syrup who had me drawn into a big hug almost, his long arms wrapping around my upper body and his chin nestled against the top of my head. I also felt Razz on my other side, his own rib cage digging into my back and his arms wrapped tightly around my waist, the only spot where Syrup wasn’t. I felt the magic thrumming through them both, leaving me drowsy and drifting off almost as soon as I had woken up.  


Unfortunately I didn't get to sleep much longer, sandwiched between the two brothers, as a loud knocking on our door startled us all awake. Syrup’s sockets snapped open in surprise and he lost his hold on me, falling off the edge of the bed and landing on the ground with a painful thud. Razz’s own grip tightened on me, his magic picking up as he tensed before realizing what he was doing. “What the hell are you doing in our bed?!!” And with that I was ever so gracefully kicked out of the bed and onto Syrup. Poor guy had just been getting up too.  


“HUMAN! I AM SURPRISED I GOT UP BEFORE YOU! BUT I THOUGHT I SHOULD LET YOU KNOW THAT IT IS GETTING RATHER LATE AND WE SHOULD PROBABLY GO SOON” Blueberry called through the door. I pushed myself off of Syrup and helped him up in the process. Razz grumbled from the bed and got up from the other side as I called to Blue that we'd be ready soon. 

\--

An exhausting day of _just_ driving. Nothing but the road going by, mainly highway, so there wasn’t even much change of scenery. The only thing that changed were billboards and highway signs. _How exciting._ I also hadn’t gotten a decent night’s sleep the previous night, so driving for twelve hours straight had me dragging my feet and fighting to keep my eyes open and my mind focused. I was really ready for a good night’s sleep and the rooms we had gotten were pretty nice, two beds, one for myself again, along with other hotel room things. Somehow, in my tired haze, I had forgotten any and all of my luggage, _I can’t believe everyone just let me walk up here without my shit._ And now I had to get it. I really didn’t want to.  


Razz was just finishing getting ready for bed, Syrup was already asleep, the lucky bastard, when I left with a keycard and my keys to get my crap. The door closed quietly behind me and I vaguely thought that maybe I should have let Razz know. _Eh, too late now._ I shrugged the thought away and rode the elevator down to the ground floor, eyes drooping. The lights on all the floors had been dimmed as soon as it hit midnight, _why is it so late_ , and most of the people staying in the hotel had already gone back to their rooms. The lobby was empty other than a person working behind the front desk when I passed through towards the parking lot.  


I unlocked my car and opened the back, blindly rummaging through for my bag. _Where is it?_ I groaned, too tired for this, and shut the back, turning around to go back into the building to my awaiting bed. I passed through the empty lobby again and rode back up the elevator. I got off on my floor and went to my room. I slid the keycard in and pulled it back out. Red. I frowned and did it again. Red. I tried a few more times and was denied access. I glared at the door barring me from my bed. My eyes were bleary and I stifled a yawn angrily. _How dare this door._ I knocked on it, still glaring at it in my tired haze.  


The door opened to a dark room, a light blue illuminating Razz’s sockets. “My keycard didn’t work.” I mumbled, shoving the thing away and stepping into the room. Razz didn’t say anything as I tiredly shuffled over to my bed and flopped over onto it. There was someone in my bed, _I can’t believe Syrup moved in on my bed so fast_ , that I chose to ignore. The door clicked closed and the soft blue light moved over to the other bed. My eyes drifted closed.  


I woke to a sudden tightening around my waist and something stiffening up next to me. I felt magic pick up and I opened my eyes, blinking tiredly. _Only eight in the morning? Who decided to wake up at this ungodly hour?_ “nyeh heh” _That didn’t sound like Syrup._ I followed the arm encircling my abdomen up to a bright orange skull. Honey looked back down at me, flush deepening. He pulled his arm away quickly and scooted away from me, leaving my back cold. “wh-what are you doin here, hun?” Honey asked me, looking anywhere but me.  


Before I could ask Honey what _he_ was doing here, Blue peeked into the room from the bathroom, a bright smile on his teeth. “THE HUMAN DECIDED TO JOIN US FOR A SLUMBER PARTY! YOU WERE ALREADY ASLEEP WHEN THEY KNOCKED ON OUR DOOR LAST NIGHT! IN FACT, I WAS ALMOST ASLEEP TOO. WHY WERE YOU UP SO LATE, HUMAN?” Blue said, turning to me in confusion.  


“I was trying to find my bag in my car. I think I tried getting into your guys’s room by mistake. I was exhausted.” I said, rubbing at my eyes as I sat up on the bed that wasn’t actually mine. “I meant to get back into my own room but thanks for letting me stay the night. I think I might’ve passed out in the hallway otherwise.”  


“OH, THAT’S QUITE ALRIGHT, HUMAN FRIEND! IF YOU EVER WANT TO HAVE ANOTHER SLEEPOVER, PAPY AND I WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO HAVE YOU!” Blue said in understanding, smiling.  


I nodded, ignoring the renewed heat on Honey’s face. “Alright, thanks Blue. And I guess I’ll extend the same invitation to you and Honey, if you ever wanted to sleep over.” I said, shrugging and leaning back against my hands. It was nice not having to wake up to Razz’s yelling, or to have to wake him up. Maybe I’d have to take Blue up on that offer.  


Blue beamed, his eye lights turning into bright stars. “I’D LOVE TO SLEEP OVER SOMETIME! WE’LL HAVE TO MAKE A DATE OF IT!”  


I laughed, nodding. “Sounds good”  


I chatted with Blue for a little while longer, Honey sitting on the other side of the bed and trying very hard to get his orange flush under control, when a loud pounding on the door startled all of us. “BLUE, HAVE YOU SEEN THE HUMAN?” Razz yelled, particularly loudly, through the door, not relenting in his pounding. I heard a loud commotion come from the room against the Underswap’s.  


“GET OUT YOU FILTHY MONGER! WE HAVE NOTHING OF YOURS!” Fell’s voice could be heard pretty loudly through the not so thick walls. Honey looked towards the wall, shocked, as something smashed against it and someone yelped. Blue opened the door as Syrup teleported into the room, looking worse for wear.  


Syrup’s eyes lit up and he scooped me into a hug as Razz rather rudely shouldered past Blue into the room. “i’m glad you’re okay” Syrup told me, nuzzling the top of my head. I got a rather painful smack to the back of the head from Razz.  


“Idiot! You can’t just leave the room without telling one of us! What if you had gotten killed?! Or kidnapped?! We wouldn’t have been any the wiser!” Razz berated me, an accusing finger pointed at me.  


“we were worried about you, sweetness. we thought something bad had happened to you when you weren’t in bed this morning.” Syrup told me, seeming more relieved that I was alive and well than angry.  


“And then we had to go and search the entire damn building for you! And you happen to just be in here?!” Razz said, incredulous as he gestured around at the room.  


“WELL, SHE DID SAY SHE WAS TIRED LAST NIGHT…” Blue spoke up, looking a little worried as he watched with wide eye lights.  


“You were over here for the entire night?!?!” Razz sounded even more incredulous.  


“I was tired.” I shrugged, though it was a little awkward since Syrup was still holding me. “And I realized I didn’t bring my bags up so I went to get them and when I came back I guess I went to the wrong door.” Razz looked at me, his expression hard to read, for almost a full minute.  


“You’re an idiot.” He sighed, pressing the heels of his hands against his sockets. “I can’t believe that, out of every human, I got stuck with an idiot.” He sighed again and walked back to the door. He looked back at me. “Your bags are right next to the door. How?” He sounded like he was seriously at a loss. “How can you just… miss them?”  


I thought for a moment, the entire room quiet. “I was tired.”  


“Oh my God” Razz groaned. “I live with an idiot. I can’t believe it.” He muttered more incomprehensible things as he left the room. I heard our own room’s door close. A minute later a soft, steady thudding came from the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And cue Razz banging his head against the wall for hours on end as he wonders just _how_ he got stuck with Reader.


	14. Mirror, Mirror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a shot based on the question of 'who is the most powerful?'. I did add my own headcanons in for fair warning and I suck at writing fight scenes. Enjoy!

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the most powerful of them all?”  


“It depends on if we’re talking about pure strength, or if we’re taking into account strategy as well.” Ink answered me, hand on his chin as he looked thoughtfully at the mirror. “Of course, you’re a human so you have the immediate advantage, but I take it we’re only talking about the monsters present.” I hummed my affirmative and studied the room of skeleton monsters with Ink.  


“What about Error?” I suggested, eyeing the glitchy skeleton who was sitting in a corner and looking rather pissed as Fresh continued talking to him. “He destroys AUs, so that’s gotta be something, right?”  


“If you gave him time to get puppets together then yeah, he could potentially be unbeatable. He mainly focuses on mind games though and uses the family or friends of the monster he’s attacking to attack for him. Once he’s on his own he’s still a decent opponent but I’ve beaten him more than once.” Ink said, shrugging.  


“What about Fresh then?” I asked, looking to the radical skeleton. “He’s a parasite and can control his host, so he could potentially control someone much stronger, right? Kind of like what Error could do?”  


“Error’s and Fresh’s magic doesn’t exactly work like that. If the being they’re trying to control is too strong, they won’t be able to control them. And Fresh only fights when his survival is threatened. He couldn’t care less about fighting otherwise, so as long as he has a good host, he’s fine. And that’s another thing too, Fresh with a host is decently powerful and honestly freaky as fuck but when he doesn’t have a host he’s nearly useless. He can’t use magic without a host and if you don’t have a SOUL like me or have one that’s too strong for him to control, he’s pretty easy to contain.”  


“Okay, okay, so what about you then? You’re the defender of the AUs and you’ve won fights against Error. How strong do you think you are?” I asked, looking at the skeleton beside me.  


He hummed, seeming thoughtful again. “I guess I’m pretty strong. I don’t actively look for fights but I can hold my own in one and I’ve faced off against some dangerous people.” He scratched the back of his head, chuckling embarrassedly at this. “Mainly because I’m always forgetting not to show myself in AUs that don’t like me. And, heh, if we’re being honest I’m not much for strategy, I just kinda go in and try to mess up my opponent by being as erratic and unpredictable as possible. But it works!” Ink said, brightening up again and grinning. “And then they don’t see it coming when I kick their ass into the ground.”  


I blew air out of my nose in amusement, Ink’s grin getting wider. “Okay, okay, so who wouldn’t you like to fight in this room?” I asked, changing the subject slightly.  


Ink hummed and looked around. “I think I wouldn’t like fighting anyone, they’re all powerful in their own rights-other than Error-so yeah!”  


“Okay, okay, are we taking Blue and Papyrus in a regular route scenario where you don’t want to fight them, or genocide route?” I asked, surveying the skeletons happily chatting away.  


“Either one. If we’re talking genocide then I’d definitely fight Papyrus before Blue.” Ink stopped short of his explanation and I prompted him as to why he would rather fight Papyrus. “Because in Underswap’s genocide route, if you try to kill Blue during your first battle, Honey takes over and battles you instead. If you get past him and kill everyone else, it’s Blue you meet at the Judgement Hall and, well, his battle become a bit harder then.” Ink said, smiling nervously as Blue noticed our stares and waved at us.  


“So it’s like the disbelief idea” I said, waving back to Blue and thinking.  


“Yeah, in a way. Disbelief is a lot more rare though. Almost every time there’s a genocide route in Underswap, Blue is the one you face at the Judgement Hall. There’s the rare occasion when you do get a disbelief route, actually killing Blue during his first battle, and then facing Honey who’s even worse in the Judgement Hall, but like I said, disbelief routes are rare.”  


“Okay, okay. So what about your classic variant then? Where is he placed on this scale?” I asked, looking over to see Sans snoozing on a chair.  


“Obviously in pacifist or neutral routes, he’s the lowest out of everyone because he doesn’t fight whatsoever, just like Honey during a pacifist or neutral. In genocide he’s strong but he always uses the same attack pattern so even if you die a lot at first, it won’t change for the next fight. Of course, there’s the problem with his dodging, which he does often and only at the very end of his battle can you actually get a hit on him, but it’s always a guaranteed one shot because he has such low health. I think I’d place him a little higher than Papyrus, Blue, and Honey, if we’re going for the genocide route idea.”  


I hummed, nodding. “Okay, what about the Fells then? Underfell and Swapfell? I know they all fight you no matter what route you’re on, so what are your ideas on that?” I asked, looking around at the edgier skeletons.  


“The pacifist route is basically the same for both universes. Fell and Razz are both really strong opponents and so are Red and Syrup. Pacifist wise, I’d fight Fell first, Razz next, then Syrup, then Red mainly because of the mentalities of each and how much effort they put into the fight. Genocide routes coincide with their counterparts, Undertale and Underswap. I know you didn’t do a genocide route with Swapfell, but if you had a thing similar to Underswap’s genocide ending would have happened and Syrup probably would have jumped into your’s and Razz’s fight to save his brother. He’s weaker during that fight than when you face him in the Judgement Hall because he’s a lot more panicked rather than just having a cold resolve, so he’s the easiest out of the four during genocide. However, you would have faced Razz in the Judgement Hall and, well, heh, I don’t think you’d want to do that. He and Blue are a lot stronger than they give on.” We both eyed the two skeletons. Razz had his arms crossed and was rolling his eyes at something while Blue bounced happily at his brother’s side, chattering away.  


“I think I have an idea on Razz’s strength.” I commented. “He can be a scary bitch when someone pisses him off.” I muttered.  


“Heh heh, yeah…” Ink looked away as he rubbed the back of his neck. “For the Underfell genocide route, Fell is still just as hard to kill as he is during pacifist and, despite my saying he’s the easiest during pacifist, he is by no means weak. And, well, then there’s Red, who out of the four universes is, arguably, the most difficult to fight during the genocide route. He has a similar fight to Sans in that he uses the same attacks, but they’re a lot stronger. Not to mention he dodges as well and can take more than one hit to kill thanks to his LV.”  


I hummed, nodding and surveying the room. “Of course, the multiverse is infinite, there are literal Gods, and all powerful beings, and if we don’t just limit ourselves to the variants of Sans and Papyrus, then, well,” Ink shrugged, “there’s definitely more powerful monsters out there.”  


“So,” I smirked and Ink looked at me. “do you think you’d beat me in a fight?” Ink studied me for a moment.  


“Probably not!”  


I sighed. “Ink, you’re no fun. That was supposed to be a challenge.”  


“I know! And therefor I won because I didn’t accept!” Ink replied cheerily. I looked at him sideways and he smiled back.  


“Fine” I huffed. “Give me someone to fight. I want to do something” I said, boredom deciding to set in. I got the itch to move and do something.  


Ink hummed, looking around thoughtfully. “Go try and get Sans to fight” He said, smirking at me. I looked at the napping skeleton and knew he wouldn’t bother. At the most he’d throw a bone at me and consider that a confrontation.  


“Hey Razz, let’s fight!” I called over to the edgy skeleton. Ink seemed taken aback when Razz looked at me oddly. I grinned back at Ink. “You never said which Sans, Ink.” I pointed out. “Come on, Razz! Let’s go outside and fight! I want to do something!” I went back to yelling at Razz who seemed a little amused at my sudden urge to fight him.  


“i could go for watchin’ a fight” Red seemed up for the idea.  


“I HOPE YOU TWO WON’T HURT EACH OTHER” Papyrus said, looking between Razz and I worriedly.  


“been awhile since they’ve actually fought” Syrup hummed, looking between us as well.  


“I’M SURE NEITHER OF THEIR SKILL IS ANY MATCH FOR MINE” Aaaand that seemed to do it for Razz who glowered at Fell and waved me to follow him outside.  


I bounced out the door after him, adrenaline already flowing through my body as the rest of the skeletons followed us. “DON’T KILL EACH OTHER” Blue warned us. Everyone looked at him. “WHAT? I’D SAY THAT’S A REASONABLE WARNING” Blue pouted. I shrugged and stood across from Razz, the others all giving a wide amount of space for the upcoming battle.  


“I hope you’re ready to lose” Razz taunted me from across the field.  


“What? To you? No way” I taunted back. Razz grinned and the confrontation started.  


Razz sent a strong wave of bones my way, most of them sharpened into deadly points. I dodged around them and moved forwards during the attack so when my turn started I had that much less distance to cover. I ran at Razz, attempting to go for some sort of body slam only to continue going. I spun as a blaster charged behind me and rolled away from the beam. Six more were already summoned around me. I felt the sheer power of one of them when it got a little too close.  


This continued on for some time. Me dodging all of Razz’s attacks and him dodging mine. I was in the middle of weaving around a wave of bones when the blue attack came in. I got hit by the first two blue bones and felt my health drop. “Dirty trick! Boo!” I yelled at Razz, charging him again when his turn ended.  


“You need to be prepared” Razz said back, dodging my attempt and surrounding me with blasters again. I had no way out of this ring and they were all charging up at once. I knew they would each fire a second later than each other, but I took a different way than just running in a circle of death. I jumped up onto one of the blaster skulls and propelled myself forwards towards Razz. I tackled him to the ground and pinned him there.  


“Weren’t prepared for that one, huh?” I asked, grinning as the confrontation ended. We were both breathing heavily and worn out, but it was a good burn.  


“I guess not” Razz agreed, grinning as well. “But I will be for next time. I know your tricks now, human” I smiled and got off Razz, pulling him up in the process.  


“That was one of many, Razz. I can always think of new ones.” I said, brushing myself off and trying to get my breathing under control. “I liked your idea about sending the blue attack right in the middle of the regular. It definitely did catch me off guard even if it was a little dirty.”  


“You always need to be on the lookout for those kinds of things. Jumping off my blaster was an interesting idea, if a little reckless and last minute. If I had actually been trying to maim or kill you you certainly wouldn’t have had time for that.” Razz told me.  


I hummed. “Yeah, I guess you’re right, but the thing with the circle of blasters is that they start wearing you out. If they don’t get you the first time then constantly running around in them will exhaust you. Which is why I took the opportunity while I had it. If I hadn’t you easily could have exhausted me and won. I was doing a whole lot more dodging than you were and people as a whole can only handle so much physical and mental strain before they give out. It doesn’t matter how determined you are.”  


Razz hummed too. “Well, that is more or less the point. To kill you immediately or wear you out until you can’t dodge any longer and die anyways. Depending on the match up though, a human could just as easily out last a monster and exhaust them until they give up and are killed. Just because I don’t dodge as much as you doesn’t mean I don’t use up just as much energy. Magic takes a lot and using it constantly to attack like that drains us quickly, so if a monster gets faced with a human who can dodge all their attacks and then some, basically one who has a greater stamina, then the human wins. Of course, it works in the opposite as well, where a monster can wait out a human if their attacks don’t hit, so long as they dodge the human’s attacks, and win that way. It all depends.” Razz said, shrugging.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I'm not the first one to headcanon (at least for Underswap) that Blue faces you in the Judgement Hall in a Genocide, but I'm not sure where I got the idea from.
> 
> Anyways, to clear up any confusion, in my versions of these universes, it is almost always a Sans who faces you in the Judgement Hall in a Genocide run (other than disbelief runs). And, almost every Sans has low health (depending on LV and training it can be a little higher, like Blue isn't at 1 because he lives healthily but he's pretty low and Razz has the highest STATs out of the four universe's Sanses because he trains and has a higher LV, whereas UT! Sans is 1 because he doesn't train or have LV and Red's is somewhat higher because of his LV). 
> 
> Razz and Blue still fight the human early on (where UT! Papyrus's fight would take place) but because of their lower HP, their brothers watch out for them during the fight. If it's a pacifist run, the Papyruses don't step in, but as soon as they see their bro might be in danger because of a genocide run, they take over and through one circumstance or another, get their brother out of there while fighting until they die. Naturally, Razz and Blue fall into the role of Judge and, well, I hope you're happy with the route you chose.
> 
> Sidenote: Blue does still want to believe in the human, but he's a lot better at recognizing when someone's too far gone than UT! Paps.


	15. The Abandoned Mansion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The universes get together to go explore an abandoned mansion. What could go wrong?

“HUMAN! WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME TO AN ABANDONED HOUSE WITH US? IT WILL BE VERY FUN!” Blueberry asked me, jumping up and down excitedly.  


“Is it haunted?” I asked, wary of the sudden request. Now that I took the time to look up from my phone it did look like everyone was getting ready to go out. _But it’s already 9 o’clock._ I guess they want to be spooked.  


“THAT IS WHAT PAPY SAID TOO, BUT I’M NOT SURE IF IT REALLY IS OR NOT.” Blue said, seeming thoughtful.  


“hundred percent it’s haunted.” Honey guaranteed, winking at us as he packed a flashlight into a bag.  


"wanna put a bet on it?" Red asked, sharp teeth pulled into a grin as he watched Honey pack. 

Honey looked back at him and grinned. "sure, ten bucks says you aren't winning this one" 

"heh, we'll see" 

“Eh, I'm alright." I said, looking towards Blue and shrugging. "You guys can go have fun”  


“you scared?” Red taunted, grinning towards me. Razz seemed amused as well and I ignored the both of them.  


“I don’t mess with the supernatural.” I told them quite reasonably.  


“you live with reanimated corpses” Honey pointed out.  


“That’s entirely different. I don’t do that paranormal thing. I’ve seen enough to know not to mess with angry spirits and demons.” I said, Razz scoffing at being called a ‘reanimated corpse’.  


“i’ll be there ta protect ya, doll” Red cut in, grinning sharply at me.  


“Even more reason to stay home” I retorted. I didn’t miss the sad look on Blue’s face.  


“ARE YOU SURE YOU WON’T COME, HUMAN?” Papyrus asked, also looking downcast.  


“Sorry dude, but I’m all set without a demon cursing me, so, I don’t think I’ll be coming.” I denied.  


“Pansy” Razz called me out, wearing a smug ass grin as he waited for my reaction.  


I glanced at him and shrugged. “If you think I am cause I don’t want to go, so be it. Like I said, I don’t intend on messing with the supernatural.”  


“what’s got you so worried about it, sweetness?” Syrup asked me, looking curious.  


“Just superstition is all. Doesn’t mean you guys can’t enjoy yourselves. Just don’t bring any evil spirits home.” I answered, shrugging again.  


“DO YOU REALLY THINK THERE WILL BE EVIL SPIRITS?” Now Papyrus was starting to sound worried.  


“OF COURSE NOT. THE HUMAN IS JUST WEAK. WE DON’T NEED HER ON OUR HUNT. LET US LEAVE.” Fell said, pointing towards the door dramatically.  


“She’d just ruin it anyways” Razz grumbled in an attempt to get me to come. I ignored him, which seemed to tick him off further. “It’s not like we’re going to let you die, honestly!” He told me, exasperated.  


“yeah doll, i’ll protect ya” Red butted in again, grinning lewdly.  


“Shut up, pervert!” Razz yelled at him, shoving him away. _I taught him well. I’m so proud._ Red grumbled but didn’t bother to try and be a jerk again.  


“SO, HUMAN, WILL YOU JOIN US ON THIS SPOOKY OUTING?” Blue asked, a bit of hope flaring in his eye lights.  


“No thank you”  


“UGH, THIS IS RIDICULOUS. OBVIOUSLY THE HUMAN DOES NOT WANT TO COME WITH US FOR WHATEVER STUPID REASON THEY HAVE SO THERE IS NO POINT IN PUSHING THE MATTER. WE ARE WASTING TIME!” Fell, ever the voice of reason, yelled out.  


“BUT I THOUGHT -- WAS GOING TO BE THE ONE TO DRIVE US THERE?" Papyrus spoke up, seeming confused. "AFTER ALL, NONE OF US ARE ALLOWED TO DRIVE AFTER MIDNIGHT."  


“Just don’t go out for so long” I said, feeling everyone’s attention suddenly turned towards me. “Or drive illegally, half the monsters up here do anyways”  


“BUT THAT WOULD BE IMMORAL!” Blue cried out, looking nervous. “--, PLEASE COME WITH US! WE WON’T MAKE YOU LEAVE THE CAR IF YOU DON’T WANT, BUT A DRIVER WOULD BE MUCH APPRECIATED.”  


“Just teleport there” I said, realizing that half the skeletons here could definitely teleport all those willing to go to wherever they wanted to.  


“we can’t if we haven’t been there” Honey spoke up, rolling a lollipop he had gotten from somewhere between his teeth.  


“I guess you’re stuck driving illegally or within your time limit then. I’m not going” I said, ignoring the pleading looks of Papyrus and Blue and the exasperated sighs of Fell and Razz.  


“WELP! I GUESS WE HAD BETTER GET GOING IF WE WANT TIME TO EXPLORE THEN!” Papyrus shouted, leaving his sadness quickly and cheering on the group.  


“YES! IT’S ALREADY 9:30, WE DON’T WANT TO LET OUR TIME SLIP AWAY!” Blue said, quickly cheering up and gathering his things. This seemed to spur everyone else into movement, everyone gathering their bags and a few blankets. It almost looked like they planned on staying the night. _Why did they ask me to drive then?_  


“Where are you going anyways?” I asked Syrup who was near me.  


“i think blue called it daemon hall” He answered unsurely, shrugging. “i think it’s close to an hour away from here.”  


I did the math in my head. “That would only give you guys half an hour to explore if you wanted to be back by midnight” I said, confused. Half an hour was hardly anything when exploring something new. It would probably take them half an hour just to walk around the outside of it, much less get in and explore its nooks and crannies.  


Syrup grinned as he packed a sleeping roll away into his bag. “who said we wanted to be home by midnight?”  


“Hmm” I hummed, taking this information in. So they had been planning on staying the night. They had also, apparently, planned on dragging me into it. “Well, stay safe.” I finally said, nodding towards the tall skeleton as he stood and threw his bag over his shoulder. He grinned and leaned over to nuzzle my head.  


“we will be, sweetness. stay safe here too. call if something’s wrong.”  


“I’ll be alright, the head of the Royal Guard lives right next door.” I said, grinning when Razz scoffed. “And you can call me too, even though I don’t know if I’ll be able to do anything.”  


“OKAY, THAT’S GREAT AND ALL LOVEY DOVEY AND CRAP, BUT CAN WE GO??” Fell asked loudly, annoyed.  


“Yeah, see you guys” I said, waving towards the group as they gathered by the door. A chorus of byes and a few muttered annoyances came from the group as they left. I heard the engine of a car and a bit of yelling as everyone piled in, probably fighting for seats and space. The car pulled out of the driveway soon after and roared down the road, the silence of the night filling the air as it left.  


I got up a little while later and locked the doors and windows. I closed the blinds as well and got the remote from the TV stand. I plopped back down on the couch and turned on the TV.  


A few hours into binge watching anime, my phone pinged. I saw that it was from Syrup. ‘sweetness, where are you?’  


I looked at it, confused, before typing back a reply. ‘I’m at home?’  


It took a while to get a reply. ‘i thought i heard you here’  


‘It’s probably the ghosts or someone fucking around’ I sent back reassuringly. It worried me a little bit, but it was very possible one or multiple in the group had decided to freak everyone else out.  


‘everyone’s in the main hall with me. it sounded like it came from upstairs but it doesn’t sound like anyone’s up there’  


‘It’s props ghosts then’  


My phone rang, startling me. I realized it was Razz and answered it with a ‘hello’.  


“Trash mammal I demand you stop messing around immediately. I don’t know how you snuck into the car with us or got upstairs without our notice but I do not find it amusing.” Razz told me through the phone, sounding grumpy. I heard a bit of chatter in the background.  


“I’m at home, Razz. I didn’t get a ride there, I didn’t get upstairs in whatever haunted house you’re in, I didn’t even leave the couch.” I told him.  


“You’re lying” Razz accused.  


“Razz, I'm at home, sitting on the couch, and watching anime like a loser. You can literally hear it in the background.” I said, holding the phone towards the TV where the episode I was on was still playing. I put the phone back to my ear. “See?”  


“You could have it on your phone or something.” Razz was still in denial but sounded doubtful and, if I dared think it, nervous.  


“I don’t. I told you all this is why I didn’t want to go. If you feel that uncomfortable with it just leave. And I know you’re probably going to say you’re not or whatever, so in that case just don’t piss off whatever ghosts might be there.”  


There was silence for a moment. “And how do we do that?”  


“What? Not piss them off? I don’t know, probably leave the house or whatever. They could be like vengeful spirits or something that doesn't want you there, at least, that’s what a lot of paranormal horror movies go for.”  


“Tsk” Razz said disapprovingly.  


“If it gets too bad just get one of the teleporters to get everyone out. You all know where home is and, worst comes to worst, we go and pick up the car tomorrow.” I said reasonably, reclining against the couch. Razz grunted his acknowledgement and we hung up with each other. I saw that Syrup had messaged me again while I was talking with Razz. ‘do you really think there are ghosts’  


‘I don’t know. I was just talking with Razz about it. If worst comes to worst you and the others can just teleport home and we can get the car tomorrow’ I sent him.  


‘okay’ Syrup sent. I put my phone down and went back to my anime binge. _I hope they’re alright._  


My phone rang. Sans? was calling. _Why is he calling me?_ “Hello?”  


“heya” I was pretty sure something must have gone wrong. “so ya know how you told us paranormal stuff isn’t too great to be messing with? well, we might need you to pick us up at a mcdonald's near the manor”  


“Are you kidding me?”  


“something killed the car and no one’s magic is working right”  


“Ugh, fine. Give me your address and I’ll be there in, what, an hour was it?”  


“yeah, it took us about an hour. thanks, kiddo.” Sans hung up with me and my phone pinged a moment later, the address in a message from him. I groaned and got ready, not very happy that I had to leave the comfort of my couch and pajamas.  


...

 _Screw it, I’m going in this._ I thought to myself, deciding not to put on anything other than the pjs I was wearing. I slipped my feet into my shoes, sockless, and grabbed my keys. I grabbed my coat and left the house, locking the door behind me. I started my car and pulled out of the driveway, following my phone’s gps towards my destination. _Honestly, why do they get into crap like this? You’d figure they’d be smart enough not to mess with stuff they don’t know, but nope, they go and get themselves stuck at a haunted house. For fuck’s sake._  


I beeped when I got outside the fast food restaurant Sans told me they were at. There was movement inside and I saw from the large glass windows most of the way around the building that the skeletons inside were looking for the source. _Jesus Christ._ I honked again and Syrup spotted me. He must have pointed it out to everyone else as they all got up and moved towards the door. “You’re all a pain in my ass” I told them as they exited, my window rolled down. I unlocked the car as they reached it and let them pile in.  


“THANK YOU FOR PICKING US UP, HUMAN! WE DID NOT REALIZE THAT BUILDING WOULD BE SO SCARY!” Blue thanked me as he and Papyrus took the backmost seats. _Thank God I have a van._ I thought as Fell managed to squeeze in with them.  


“Yeah sure” I said, waving a hand. Sans got in the front seat while Red and Razz took the middle seats. Syrup was left to sit uncomfortably on the floor between them. “Did you guys want to try and get the other car in working order tonight? Cause I really don’t want to have to drive back out here tomorrow.” I asked, looking back at them all.  


“I WOULD PREFER NOT GOING BACK TO THE BUILDING TONIGHT IF THAT IS ALRIGHT” Papyrus put in, looking rather nervous.  


No one disagreed and I sighed. “Alright, fine. Syrup, try and be careful. I don’t want you flying forward if I hit the brakes too hard.” I warned him as I put the van into drive and left the parking lot. Syrup agreed that he’d be careful.  


On the drive back, I was filled in on what exactly happened at the manor. “it started off alright” Sans started. “red and i pullin stupid pranks to freak the others out, everyone explorin the place, ya know, normal stuff.”  


“AS WE WERE EXPLORING THOUGH… UNUSUAL THINGS BEGAN TO OCCUR.” Papyrus continued. “WE DIDN’T THINK TOO MUCH OF IT, BECAUSE STRANGE THINGS HAPPEN ALL THE TIME TO US!”  


“until the screamin started” Red said darkly.  


“IT WASN’T SCREAMING” Blue denied, looking sternly towards the other who only shrugged.  


“it was talking” Syrup said. “and it sounded like you, sweetness.”  


“exactly like you” Honey elaborated.  


“that was when i texted you to ask where you were. everyone was in the same room, so it couldn’t have been one of them, so we all thought you had managed to sneak in without us knowing. but when you said it wasn’t you…” Syrup trailed off.  


“we got spooked and left” Honey finished with a shrug. He grinned and looked at Red. "and now i've got ten more dollars to my name" Red grumbled and slapped a crumpled bill into his awaiting palm. He pocketed it happily.  


“Jesus, you guys made it sound like something awful happened. And the time between you texting me and calling me to pick you up was quite a while. What the hell happened between then?”  


“We had dinner” Razz said, shrugging.  


“And you didn’t even get me anything. Thanks a lot” I grumbled.  


“You didn’t come” Razz said, sounding ever so smug.  


“I came and picked your asses up when I very well could have left you to rot” I retorted, taking a left a bit sharper than intended. I heard Syrup grab onto the seats as he slid sideways. “Sorry”  


“IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER, HUMAN, I CAN MAKE YOU SOMETHING WHEN WE ARRIVE BACK AT YOUR HOUSE!" Blue said, eyes lighting up excitedly. 

"OH YEAH! I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THAT! WE DID TELL INK WE WOULD BE STAYING THE NIGHT IN YOUR UNIVERSE, SO IT GIVES US EVEN MORE TIME TO HAVE FUN AND COOK FANTASTIC FOOD!" Papyrus said, happily dropping the bomb on me. _Thanks for warning me beforehand. Now I have to deal with everyone in my house for an entire night. Ugh._  


“AND SINCE WE'RE NO LONGER STAYING AT THAT CREEPY MANSION, THAT MEANS WE’RE HAVING A SLEEPOVER AT YOUR HOUSE, RIGHT?” Blue asked excitedly, Papyrus perking up as well. I heard Fell grumble and Red nor Razz looking too happy about the idea.  


“I guess” I agreed hesitantly. _I’m tired, I hope they don’t stay up all night being loud._  


They ended up staying up the entire night, half of the skeletons congregating in my room as I tried to go to bed. “Why are you in here?” I asked grumpily, just wanting to sleep. The fact that I had three skeletons in my room and more downstairs very nearly yelling did not help.  


“cause you’re comfortable” Sans mumbled, his sockets closed contentedly as he used my side as a pillow.  


“Okay, but why are Blue and Papyrus in here?” I asked, the two other skeletons not having much of an excuse since they were lying on the floor in their bedrolls, talking loudly to each other and keeping me from sleep.  


“OH! BECAUSE WE WERE SCARED TO SLEEP ALONE!” Blue answered loudly. I groaned.  


“THANK YOU FOR LETTING US STAY WITH YOU!” Papyrus thanked me, just as loud. Blue voiced his own thanks and the skeleton lying on me mumbled his own, already half asleep. I wished I was as comfortable as he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact, my dad, brother and I will sometimes go out on days when we're home and have nothing better to do and find so called abandoned places to explore. So far we haven't found anything too spooky (we did find an abandoned building in a residential area that had long since been closed and boarded up, but one of the boards on the lower ground-level windows was missing. We're pretty sure squatters lived there so we didn't go in to explore).
> 
> Also inspired a little bit by a book I read called _Daemon Hall_.


	16. Kit Kats 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the skellies turn into kittens. And Reader has to deal with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [UltimateGamer](http://archiveofourown.org/users/UltimateGamer101/pseuds/UltimateGamer101)'s awesome fanfic [A CATastrophe Waiting to Happen](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10881633/chapters/24178986) which I highly suggest everyone go check out if you enjoy stuff like this!

“Waha, how do you all keep getting into these situations?” I wailed, collapsing on the carpeted floor of the living room. A kitten bopped my nose and another meowed worriedly at me. “And why do I always get dragged into taking care of you guys??” I cried, burying my face in the carpet. It almost seemed like one of the kittens tried answering me. Another growled unhappily. _I feel that on a spiritual level._  


I groaned and sat up earning a glare from the little kitten standing right in front of me. It meowed at me, a half growl in its throat as its tail flicked back and forth. “What are you yelling at me for? I didn't do anything, you all got yourselves into this mess." I grumbled, crossing my arms and narrowing my eyes back at the little primarily black with some white kitten.  


Instead of paying attention to the low growl emanating from Razz’s throat, I looked out at the other skeletons turned cats. And, rather than it just affecting one universe, it affected all of ours, not to mention Ink and Error, both of whom were currently off on their own adventure. I heard a crash from upstairs and pursed my lips. I guess I knew where they had gone off to. A meow from upstairs reached me, like it was apologizing. Razz growled in response to it.  


I absentmindedly scratched Syrup’s head, the skelekit having been bothering me nearly the entire time I had been awake. Yeah, that was another story. I woke up from an afternoon nap, work having exhausted me, to find a bunch of cats in my house. Based on their random appearance in the house and their... _unique_ personalities, not to mention lack of other skeletons, I figured out the situation relatively quickly. Though it had been a bit embarrassing when I realized that all these adorable little kittens were actually my friends. Yeah, I don’t want to talk about it.  


Syrup purred in my lap, kneading my thigh as he stretched and fully enjoyed every part of being a cat. _I guess he always has been rather cat like anyways, so it would only make sense he’s the most comfortable in his new body._ Not that I could exactly tell, since I couldn’t understand them anymore. A white and black kitten with a little red collar and name tag on butted my knee. Razz growled at Red who left with a haughty flick of his tail. I rolled my eyes and groaned, falling slowly back onto the ground in case there was a feline under me.  


Syrup got up and moved to my stomach, still purring as his eyes studied me. I rolled my eyes again and smiled slightly, seeming to appease him as he closed his eyes contentedly and purred louder. Gosh, he really could purr loudly.  


“Mrow?” A more white than black kitten asked, bumping into my hand to get my attention. He was wearing a little blue bandanna around his neck with a name tag attached to it, one of the other reasons I had been able to tell these weren't just normal cats.  


“Mm, yes, I agree.” I agreed, though to what I didn’t know.  


“Meow meow” Blue told me, seeming unamused as he put a paw on my hand.  


“It’s nice to meet you too” I said, curling my fingers around his paw and shaking it. He looked further unamused as I chuckled. “Hungry?” I asked. He shook his head. “Hmm” I contemplated. Blue meowed again and I hummed in question. He moved to my side and down to my hip, pawing and meowing at my pocket. “My phone?” I asked. He purred, nodding.  


I took my phone out, careful not to disturb the comfortable kit on my stomach, _now I’ll never be able to move_ , and turned it on. “Did you want me to call someone?” I asked, earning another nod and purr. “Well, if it’s another skeleton, I’m not sure how much use that’ll be, since two multiverse travelers got stuck in this situation too. Did you have any ideas?” I asked, bringing up my phone’s key pad and setting it on the ground. The other kits seemed interested and meowed curiously, Blue responding with a determined look as he tapped on my phone with a paw.  


Blue meowed at me, nudging my hand again and apparently done with my phone. I picked it up and looked at the number, not recognizing it. “Is this someone from your universe?” I asked, earning a nod. A look of realization crossed Honey’s face. “Your scientist?” I asked, earning another satisfied nod. I hummed and hit the call button.  


“H-H-Hello? Who is th-this?” Undyne’s voice came through the phone. The one from the Underswap universe sounded a lot more reserved than the Undyne I knew.  


“Hi, this is --, a friend of Blue’s.” I greeted. Blue nipped my hand and I furrowed my brows at him as he shook his head.  


“B-Blue?”  


“Er, Sans, sorry. We call him and Papyrus by nicknames in our friend group.” I corrected.  


“O-Oh, okay. Erm, and he asked you to call me?” Undyne asked.  


“Yeah, he, Papyrus, and the rest of our friends ran into a bit of a problem that we were hoping you might be able to help with.” I explained, the skelekits gathering around me to listen to the conversation. Even Syrup had stopped purring to listen.  


“What h-happened this time?” Undyne asked, sighing. It sounded like she had dealt with things like this before. I glanced over at Blue who looked a little guilty.  


“They got turned into cats” I stated bluntly, looking back up to the ceiling.  


“W-What?”  


“Sans, Papyrus, and eight of our friends all got turned into cats. I’m not sure how it happened, I woke up from an afternoon nap to them like this and I can’t understand them, so…” I trailed.  


“O-Oh. O-Okay. Would I-um-be able to look at them? I-I’m not sure if I c-can do anything without seeing them f-first...” Undyne said.  


“Yeah of course. Where should I meet you?”  


“Um, do you know wh-where the lab is in the Underground in H-Hotlands?” She asked. I voiced my affirmative. “O-Okay, well, I can, um, meet you there. Wh-What should I be looking for, other th-than cats, apparently?”  


“I’m a human, so I don’t think it’ll be too hard to spot us.” I said, earning a soft sound of understanding from the scientist. “Is it okay if I get there in twenty to thirty minutes? I’m not sure how long it’ll take for me to transport all of these cats.” I asked.  


“O-Oh, yeah, that’s p-perfect actually, it-it’ll give me time to get there and s-set up my equipment. I-I’ll see you.” Undyne agreed, hanging up with me.  


“So, now we have to wonder how we’re all going to get to Underswap. Think Dream’ll help us out?” I asked, glancing to my side for acknowledgement from anyone. Blue nodded happily, purring again. “Alright” I sighed, finding Dream’s number and calling.  


“Hello!” Dream greeted me from the other end cheerily.  


“Hey Dream, this is --. I was wondering if you could bring us all to Underswap? Everyone turned into cats suddenly and don’t seem to have their magic.” I asked, getting straight to the point.  


“Sure! You’re in Swapfell right now, right?” He agreed easily. _Huh._  


“Yeah” I confirmed.  


“Alright! I’ll be over in a few minutes!” He said, hanging up with me.  


“Well, that was easy.” I said, putting my phone back down. Blue meowed in agreement.  


“Hey, I’m going to get up, so, uh, Syrup, can you move?” I asked, craning my neck to look at the kitten on my stomach. He only purred loudly, his eyes closed as he ignored me. “I’m standing up whether you’re on me or not” I warned him, pushing myself up slowly in case he decided to cooperate and get off. He cracked an eye open and looked at me, an almost smile on his face as he got up slowly, taking his time in stretching before he hopped off me. I rolled my eyes and stood up, careful not to step on anyone.  


“Ink! Error! I’m too lazy to walk up stairs, can you two get down here with everyone else? We’re going to Blue’s place to fuck shit up!” I yelled up the stairs, frankly far too lazy to be walking up them. I heard displeased meows from Blue and Papyrus and got an odd look from Honey. A few of the others seemed to be snickering. Razz and Fell seemed highly unamused.  


“Meow meow!” One of them, probably Ink, Error didn’t really seem to be the type to respond happily to anything, called back to me. “Meow?” Ink, now a little white cat with a black splotch on his left cheek, peeked his head out between the poles of the railing upstairs and looked down at me curiously. I could just make out the darker form of Error near him.  


“Yeah, Dream’s coming to get us and I called Undyne from Underswap and asked her to help us out.” I explained to the two. “I really don’t know if I trust our own” I said, chuckling guiltily. Razz and Syrup seemed to agree with me on that.  


“Meow meow” Ink said, nodding. He was about to turn away when he got a mischievous look about him and turned back to face me, still about five feet above me. I heard Error growl in annoyance as he started walking away towards the stairs. Ink stood on his four paws, his front lowered and back raised and wiggling back and forth. He jumped from the banister before I could stop him.  


“Ink, what the heck?” I asked, unamused as I caught the skelekit and looked down at him.  


“Meow?” He asked innocently, looking back at me with a happy look on his furry face. I rolled my eyes and set him down on the ground. Error joined us from the stairs and sat outside the group, looking very done with all this. I happened to agree with his sentiment.  


I moved over to the couch, watching my feet the entire time in case someone ran in front of me, and plopped down onto it. Syrup jumped up almost immediately and situated himself on my lap. I rolled my eyes and scratched behind his ears, earning a satisfied purr. A meow came from the ground and I looked down to see Red glaring up at Syrup. Syrup only purred louder, his tail moving to curl around him and cover his nose as he closed his eyes. Red growled and jumped up on the couch. One of Syrup’s eyes cracked open, watching as Red grumpily laid down against my thigh with his paws tucked under him and his own tail flicking back and forth in annoyance. Syrup looked up to me and I shrugged.  


There seemed to be talking going on on the ground again, the kittens still on the floor forming a loose circle and meowing at each other. Fell growled at an idea that Razz had suggested and both began hissing at each other. _Oh boy._ Neither cat on the couch with me seemed too concerned, but that was probably because they were both dozing off. Papyrus jumped in before a fight could break out and Blue backed him up. _Power team._ Sans and Honey discussed something between themselves while the other four argued.  


Error was watching from afar with a bored expression that turned to annoyance when Ink came out of nowhere and attempted to jump on him. Error was quick to hiss at him, haunches raised as he glared the other down. Ink only seemed to be amused, lowering his body to the ground and waving his tail back and forth playfully. Error warned him with a growl, his guard not lowering whatsoever, and Ink responded by jumping at him again. Error hissed and batted him away, redirecting his course into the ground. The mainly white kitten tumbled as he crashed into the ground before he jumped up, looking excited as he shook his poor landing off. Error growled lowly when Ink turned to him again and slowly backed away from the other.  


The doorbell rang, startling most of the skelekits. I looked down at the feline on my lap, purring happily, and scooted my hands under him, picking him up with me as I stood. Red jumped off the couch and waited with the other kits as I moved towards the door, tucking Syrup under one arm. _Hah, the tables have turned, skeleton._ I thought, grinning triumphantly to myself as I now fully understood that the tall skeleton was now smaller than me. He didn’t really seem to care, only shifting slightly to get more comfortable as I opened the door.  


“Hey, Dream. Thanks for agreeing to help out.” I greeted the smiling skeleton, opening the door wider and letting him inside.  


“Of course! I’m always glad to help out!” Dream said, his eye lights turning to yellow stars in his sockets as he looked at the skelekits. “Wow, this definitely is something I haven’t seen before. Do you know what happened?” He asked, looking back to me curiously as Ink ran over and started batting at his shoelace. Dream laughed, crouching down and spying the tag on Ink’s color splotched collar. “I should’ve guessed, troublemaker.” Dream tutted good-naturedly as Ink all but ignored him and continued trying to maul Dream’s poor shoelace. Blue noticed Dream had arrived and bolted over, bumping into his hand in excitement. “Oh, hi Blue! How do you all manage to get yourselves into these situations?” Dream asked, looking back over at the other felines in wonder.  


“As for your original question, I don’t know what happened. I was taking a nap, a cat nap, I guess you could say-” I earned very many unamused looks and glares as well as a few amused looks. “-and then I wake up and everyone is cats, kittens, if I’m exact.” I said. “And we can’t exactly understand them either, they don’t seem to have their magic, but the one good thing is they do still have their consciousnesses, so we’re not just having to deal with some ill tempered felines” I said, shooting Razz a look. He glared back at me, tail flicking back and forth behind him.  


“Ah, well, that last part is good at least! So does that mean Syrup is just okay being held like that?” Dream asked, eyes falling to my arm where Syrup hadn’t moved since he got comfortable.  


“Oh, yeah, I think he prefers it, honestly.” I said, putting him down anyways. He looked back at me sadly, only proving my point.  


“Hmm” Dream hummed, a smile on his teeth as he watched Syrup wander back over to the group. “Well, that’s adorable.” Dream said, nodding to affirm his point as he grinned up at me. “But, would you like to go now? Do we have everyone?” Dream asked after a moment, looking back to the cats and doing inventory. I checked quickly as well, everyone around, Error hanging slightly to the side, and all looking ready to go. Except Ink who was still mauling Dream’s shoelace.  


“Yeah, everyone’s here. But how are we going to carry them all?” I voiced my concern aloud, just now realizing that there were far too many cats, even if they were little, to be carrying between the two of us. Dream’s expression turned thoughtful and he hummed before I remembered something. “Oh! That’s right, I still have stuff I never used for the cat I never got. I’ll be right back!” I said, stepping around the kits and running up the stairs.  


I came back down with a cat carrier and Dream’s face lit up. I still had it because, a while ago, I had planned on getting a cat of my own and had gotten stuff for it an everything but never actually went through with the plan. I thought maybe I would get one eventually, but who knows.

“Oh! That’s a great idea!” Dream said as I set the carrier down and opened it up. Dream made his way over and looked it over. “Do you have any blankets we can add? That way it might be a little more comfortable?” He suggested, glancing around. “Is that one okay to use?” He asked, pointing to one next to the couch. I gave my affirmative and Dream retrieved it, happily touching up the inside of the carrier to make it more livable.  


“Alright, get in” I told the kits, gesturing to the crate. They all looked at me like I was crazy. “Look, two of us aren’t going to be able to carry ten cats, so get in. It won’t be for long anyways.” I said, rolling my eyes. They were silent for a minute before Papyrus meowed encouragingly to the group, Blue joining in. Dream seemed to be slightly amazed as maybe half of the kittens reluctantly followed the two to the carrier. Papyrus and Blue walked in first, followed by Honey, Sans, and Ink. I raised my brows at those left. Syrup reluctantly followed. Razz, Fell, Red, and Error all denied going anywhere near it. The two former glaring challengingly at me.  


We were at a standoff for a few more moments before I shrugged. “Fine, you’re being carried then. Sorry, Error, if it makes you feel better I’ll make sure we don’t hold onto you for too long. There’s not much else I can do since we need contact to teleport.” I told the dark kitten apologetically. I knew he had a strong phobia of physical contact, but there wasn’t much else I could do. Error huffed and laid down on the floor, his legs tucked underneath him and his tail curling around him as he seemed to accept his fate. “Now, the rest of you can either get your furry asses in this carrier or you can be humiliatingly carried to Undyne’s lab.” I said, glaring at the other three. Fell gave in and walked into the character, his tail flicking sharply and a commanding meow getting Red to follow after him.  


“Razzabelle?” I gave the grouch one last chance. He growled at me, paws planted. I closed the carrier door. “Fine, get over here” I told him, narrowing my eyes as he complied, a smug look on his face and his tail waving in the air. Dream stifled a laugh as I attempted to pick Razz up only to have him dodge my attempts and jump on my head instead. “Pain in my ass” I cursed at him, only earning a self satisfied purr in response as he hung onto my head with his claws. I stood up slowly to avoid having Razz dig his claws deeper into my skull. He slid them out further just to spite me.  


“Ready?” Dream asked, amusement clear in his voice as he watched Razz hang onto my head.  


“Ready as ever. Error, should Dream pick you up or should I?” I asked the only other skelekit still out. He stood and moved over to me slowly, clearly not wanting to be carried whatsoever but being oddly compliant. “Alright” I said, not moving to pick him up yet. “Dream, can you take the carrier then?” I asked, glancing at the skeleton from the corner of my eye.  


“Of course!” He agreed, moving over to it and picking it up. He held his other hand out to me, eyes starred again as I grabbed onto his hand and picked Error up, feeling him tense. The world went black half a heartbeat after.  


As soon as I regained my bearings, blinking myself into reality in the other universe, I set Error down. I released Dream’s hand and noticed we were just outside Hotland’s lab. It was oddly silent in the Underground, my universe or not, with the barrier broken. I wondered for a moment why Undyne had wanted to meet here before deciding she was probably just being cautious. After all, she didn’t know me. That or there was better equipment here. Maybe it was a mixture of both? Well, no point dwelling.  


Excited meowing came from the carrier and Dream smiled widely. “Alright, well, thanks Dream. I can handle it from here and call if I need you again?” I said.  


“Oh, yeah, no problem. I probably should get going, don’t want to freak Undyne out.” He agreed, handing the carrier off to me. “And yeah, if you need me feel free to call and I’ll do my best to get back to you as soon as possible!” He said, waving and disappearing, leaving only a slight golden dust to sift to the ground.  


With that I turned back to the lab and knocked on the large steel doors. They were imposing, like they had once hidden awful secrets. I had a feeling I knew exactly what those secrets were. The doors opened with a metallic whish, squeaking a little from disuse. “Oh, h-h-hi. Are y-you --?” Undyne’s stuttering voice greeted me.  


“Yep, thanks for agreeing to try and help out. I appreciate it” I affirmed, the lights buzzing on overhead and illuminating the cold lab and the timid scientist standing a few feet inside the doors.  


“O-Okay.” Her eyes were on my head before they slid down to the carrier in my hands and dropped further to Error who had walked in. “S-So, these a-are th-them?” She asked, her hands wringing together nervously as more meowing echoed from the carrier. They had been silent up until this point, and now seemed itching to be out of the cramped cage.  


I set the carrier down on the floor as the doors closed behind me and opened it, flashes of white and black rushing from it. Those lazier came out more slowly, looking around at their surroundings cautiously. Honey glanced around before spotting the nervous scientist and moving over to her. Blue had gotten there before him and was purring loudly, rubbing his cheek against her leg. Honey sat in front of her, his eyes inquisitive as she looked worriedly back at him, seeming unsure how to deal with the situation.  


After a moment, which had included me trying to shake Razz off my head and only getting his needle-like claws to dig further into my skull, Undyne crouched down and carefully turned Honey’s tag around to read it. Her eyes skimmed it from behind her large glasses before she released the tag and turned to Blue, stopping him gently and reading his own tag. “And y-you said y-your friend group uses n-nicknames? Would P-Papyrus’s happen to be H-Honey?” She asked, looking to me as Razz purred mockingly on my head.  


“Yeah, it is” I affirmed, her eyes flashing in worry.  


“O-Okay, what are the other’s n-names, if I could a-ask?” She asked, looking around at the many kittens now exploring her lab or laying around.  


I nodded slightly, not disturbing Razz too much, and started with him first. “This is Razz, on my head.” Undyne seemed amused by this as she nodded. “That’s Syrup, the one sleeping again.” I said, pointing towards the kit sleeping just outside the carrier. Apparently he hadn’t gone very far before laziness overtook him. He purred in response. “Then there’s Red, Fell, Ink, and Error” I said, pointing out each as I named them. Both Fell skeletons were searching the lab warily, untrusting, and Ink was bothering Error again. I looked over to the Undertale skeletons. “And, I know it’s a little odd, but that’s Papyrus and Sans.” I said. If they hadn’t had nametags on, I may have gotten away with coming up with nicknames for them on the spot, but I had no doubt Undyne would get suspicious if she read them and found out I had been lying to her.  


Undyne seemed taken aback for a moment, looking at the Undertale skelekits for a moment. “O-Okay” She said, thankfully not asking questions. I let out a quiet breath of relief. “U-Um, Papyrus, I-I’m going to need to r-run some tests and c-calibrate my equipment. Is-Is it okay if I use you?” She asked Honey, her hands working together nervously again as she looked down at the little kit. Honey nodded and she awkwardly picked him up, shifting him carefully when she stood before she moved further into her lab. I decided to sit and wait with the others. Blue came over and meowed worriedly at me. I patted his head and reassured him his brother would be fine and everything would work out. I didn’t know how much of that was true.  


Undyne came back a while later, Honey following after her. Blue ran over to his brother and meowed worriedly at him. Honey replied and seemed to sate his brother's worries for the time being. “Um, w-well I r-ran some tests and I-I think this was caused by some m-machine malfunction. I'm n-not too sure what th-they were doing when it malfunctioned, b-but it shouldn't take me t-too long to tweak my own m-machines and g-get them back to normal.” Undyne said, looking towards me. “I-um-I think it should only t-take me a d-day, at the most. So if-if you want I can-um-have your number? So that way you don't have to st-stay here if you d-don't want” Undyne suggested, hands working together again. I was almost positive that was her way of asking me to leave. After all I would only be in the way.  


I nodded, Razz reminding me he was still on my head by digging his claws in to stop from sliding off. “Yeah, that sounds fair. Thank you so much again, I really don't know what I would have done if you hadn't agreed to help.” I agreed. The fish woman blushed and nodded.  


When all was said and done, Undyne had my phone number and I hers. I wasn't sure where I'd go, but I didn't want to be in the way of her work. “Oh, um, also, c-could I b-borrow Papyrus?” She asked nervously, not meeting my eyes. “I-I think he'd be able to help, p-possibly, and if I n-need to re-research anymore I won't have to h-have you come all the way b-back here.”  


“Oh, yeah that probably is a good idea. Is Honey okay with it?” I agreed, looking to the skelekit. Blue seemed a little distraught as Honey nodded.  


“Meow meow meow meow?” Blue started talking with his brother, bounding over to him and nuzzling his face in concern. Honey and him conversed, Undyne and I both lost as Blue stubbornly shook his head. Honey seemed to give up and gave a consenting meow, looking only slightly annoyed and more than a little prideful as Blue happily bounded back over to me. “Meow meow meow!” He told me excitedly, nodding back to Honey and Undyne.  


“You want to stay here too?” I asked unsurely. Blue nodded happily. “Well did you ask Undyne if it's okay with her?” I asked him, amused as his face lit up and he bounded back over to Undyne and his brother, meowing up at the scientist.  


Undyne’s eyes glanced from me to Blue. “Oh, I-I guess you can s-stay if you want, Sans.” Undyne agreed hesitantly, earning an excited purr from the kit. “Um, I-I guess I can, um, c-call you when everything is a-all set up or if s-something happens, not that I think anything will!” She amended quickly. “But, um, y-yeah. I-I’ll call” She said, nodding quickly and turning away, her face a soft red in her embarrassment. I agreed, waving goodbye to the two skelekits and grabbing the carrier before leaving through the large doors, everyone trailing behind me and conversing among themselves. I put the carrier away in the storage in my phone. _Monster tech is so convenient._  


I wandered further into Hotlands, away from the lab and unsure where I should go. I wanted to be far enough away so Undyne didn’t notice if Dream teleported in out of nowhere. _Oh crap, I hope she wasn’t watching earlier when we first came._ I realized with a start, silently cursing myself. If she was like my universe’s Undyne, chances were she had cameras rigged all throughout the Underground. I didn’t know if they were still active or not, I was sincerely hoping they weren’t or else we’d have some serious explaining to do, but there was the possibility that she had turned them on after I left even if they hadn’t been on to begin with. A shiver raced down my spine and I had the distinct feeling of being monitored as I walked through the deserted Hotlands, on the way to the Barrier. _Oh, the cameras are definitely on._  


“Mrow?” Papyrus asked me, running to get up to my side and keep pace with me. I hadn’t realized how fast I had started walking in my worried state and noticed the kits falling back. I slowed and let them catch up.  


“Sorry, but I have a feeling we’re being watched. I think we’re going to have to get past the Barrier before we can call Dream again. God, that means we’ll have to take the long way to get back to her lab too, shit, that’s annoying.” I groaned in realization, continuing on my path. I tried to reason with myself that at least Hotlands was relatively close to the Barrier. And, since we were relatively unhindered, other than the skelekits’ slower walking, it shouldn’t take us more than half an hour to reach the Barrier.  


The kits started meowing, talking mainly among themselves as Papyrus fell back to join them. I glanced back every now and then to make sure they were still keeping up while simultaneously trying to keep my mind off the steadily increasing heat of the Hotlands as we got further and further away from the more industrialized spaces.  


My phone rang in my pocket and I dug it out. I noticed it was Undyne. “Hello?” I answered, walking over some precariously placed boards that were there to provide access to the Underground since the steam vents had been deactivated. There was lava below, bubbling up and stifling in its heat. I tugged on my shirt collar and felt Razz shift uncomfortably.  


“H-Hi, um, I just wanted t-to clarify, a-are all your other friends s-skeletons as well?” She asked.  


“Yeah, they are.” I said, getting past the boards and landing on more solid floor again. It was still just as hot and I was starting to sweat. I looked back to make sure everyone else had made it across and thankfully everyone was just getting off the boards as well, seeming just as relieved to be on more stable flooring again. We journeyed into the next room that had a multitude of deactivated lasers.  


“O-Okay” Undyne hung up with me shortly after an awkward silence and I put my phone back in my pocket. We trekked on.  


“I’m gonna fucking pass out from heat stroke.” I muttered, tugging on my shirt for the umpteenth time. Razz had been moving from my head to my shoulders and back again in an attempt to find a cooler spot and I was beginning to find that a separate body is incredibly awful in heat like this. I wanted to die but I had a feeling that if Hell existed, this is what it would be like. Hot as shit and making you want to die even though you’re already dead. I don’t remember it being this bad when I came through the Hotlands in my own universe, but maybe that was because I was more focused on trying to stay alive than the suffocating heat. But how could I have not noticed it?  


We eventually finally fucking reached New Home. “Oh thank fuck” I breathed out, the miserable heat lifting and giving way to something much more livable. I felt like my feet had been burned through my shoes. I checked my shoes and found the soles slightly melted away. _Fantastic._ Razz jumped off me when I collapsed face first onto the stone floor and soaked in the refreshing cool. The skelekits seemed to agree with my sentiment as most of them flopped down onto the cool stone ground and laid, unmoving and breathing heavily. Fell and Papyrus seemed to be the only ones relatively unaffected, well, I say that, but they were breathing pretty heavily.  


Maybe ten minutes later I pushed myself up again, feeling cooler and ready to go home. The kits reluctantly followed after me. Thankfully Razz decided to walk on his own this time. We passed through New Home and into the castle area. The throne room was easy to find and sunlight filtered in through the place where the Barrier used to be. It was a large, gaping hole that opened up to the side of the mountain, giving a great view of the forest and a town in the distance. I sat down on the edge and called Dream. He agreed to come get us again. This time around it wasn't nearly so hard to get everyone into the carrier. Most of them were worn out from the walk that took us nearly an hour rather than the half hour I had expected it to be. Error was the only one who stayed out and I held onto him for as short a time as possible just like the last time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pre-warning: This story is probably only going to be a two part thing because I already did write the end and I don't think I'm going to write a middle to it. I'm sorry, I know you guys probably like fluffy things, but I'm really lazy and I didn't write in the tags that I can't focus on one story for more than two seconds for nothing. 
> 
> Also, I have some more stuff written (and I'm going to write a bit more), but most of the things I _do_ have written are either half-written ideas or stories with an OC of mine in them (a few are pretty cringy too) so idk if I'll ever post them. If you guys want them (at least the half written ideas), let me know and I'll probably post them, but I can't promise I'll finish anything. I've been very lacking in my motivation to write in general.


	17. Kit Kats 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ending of the beginning

We were back at Underswap Undyne's lab. She had called to let me know the machine was done and Dream helped get us to the the Barrier's entrance, meaning we had to take another long walk through the death heat of Hotlands. I was just glad to be in an air conditioned building.

“Are you sure it’s all ready?” I asked. The skeletons turned cats were just as curious as I was when Undyne showed us the machine she insisted would work to turn them back to normal. I didn’t know much about magical tech, so I could only hope it would work.  


“Y-Yes, I’m p-pretty sure it will work. I-I think maybe w-we should test it first though? J-Just to be sure?” She suggested, looking to me unsurely.  


“On what though?” I asked back, circling the machine and looking at it from all angles. It was something like a pod, cylindrical in shape with doors that led into the inside chamber of it. There were lots of wires around the back of it, all plugged into something or another and there was a control panel on the outside of it next to the doors.  


“Um, I already d-dry ran it a f-few times, and it hasn’t m-malfunctioned, so i-if someone wanted to go f-first?” She suggested, chuckling nervously as she glanced over the skelekits.  


There was silence for a split second before Blue, Fell, Razz, and Ink all started meowing and pushing forwards towards the machine. _Strange that Papyrus didn’t volunteer as well._ I thought, looking over to the Undertale kit who was sitting with his brother and looking a little nervously at the machine. It seemed he had half a mind not to put himself in potentially dangerous situations. _Good for him. If only Razz thought a little more before he acted too._ I thought, sighing as he and Fell got into a fight and started hissing at each other. Blue jumped in between the two, trying to quell the situation and Ink seemed to have gotten bored and went off in search of something better to do. I didn't know if it was because it was hard to keep his attention for long if he really didn't care if he got back to normal or not.  


“Oh, y-you’re sure you’re o-okay with it?” Undyne asked, breaking me out of watching the three bicker. I looked towards where she was and saw Syrup standing by our feet, looking up and nodding his consent. “O-Okay. Just, um, g-get in the machine and I’ll start it up. If-if it starts to h-hurt or anything at all just, um, meow? And I-I’ll turn it off.” She told him, opening the doors. Syrup nodded and walked into the machine, sitting down in the center of it. Undyne checked the inside of it before pulling back out and confirming that Syrup was all set to go. When Syrup gave his meow of consent, Undyne nodded and closed the doors, pressing a few buttons on an outside panel on the machine.  


“Um, p-please back up for th-this. I don’t want anyone g-getting caught if it m-malfunctions.” _Not the most reassuring._ I backed away. The other kits seemed to finally realize what was happening and Fell and Razz loudly voiced their disapproval despite backing away as well. Undyne shuffled over to her computer system, a wire trailing over to it and connecting it and the machine, and typed some start up code into it. The machine began to whir.  


“O-Oh no” Undyne muttered, the machine sending sparks flying and the whirring growing louder. She started hurriedly typing away at her computer, a few lines of code scrolling by and the end sequence shutting the entire lab down. We were plunged into darkness for a second, everything dropping off line for a moment before booting back to life and bringing us back to the stark whiteness of the lab. The machine had come to a halt. There was no meowing from it, so I was hoping nothing had happened. Undyne moved over to it as a few of the kits began meowing their concern. She pressed a few buttons on the outside panel and the doors opened, steam billowing out and a very disoriented looking skeleton stumbling his way back into the lab.  


“Well, glad to see you’re back, even if the machine didn’t, um, survive” I greeted the tall skeleton, averting my eyes to a whitewashed wall. Even though skeletons had nothing to hide and Syrup was technically ‘dressed’ with his collar still on, I didn’t want to intrude.  


“Oh st-stars” Undyne muttered, her face flushing a dark crimson as she too averted her eyes, finding more interest in the same wall I was inspecting. “Um, i-it worked. And now th-that I know that, with a f-few adjustments to stop it f-from breaking down, everyone sh-should be back to normal f-fairly soon.”  


Razz meowed at his brother, circling his feet and glaring up at him as Syrup flushed and looked for something to cover himself with. I threw him the coat I had that had almost killed me in my journey across Hotlands for a second time. I really don’t know why I brought it, but I was glad I had, and Syrup was too, even if it was small for him. “thanks, hun” He said, tying it around his waist in a way that it almost acted like shorts. His face was still a bright orange as Razz growled at him for something. “uh” Syrup looked like he was debating on whether or not to say something to me, his face heating even more before he just turned to the still red-faced scientist. “undyne, thanks. and i don’t mean to rush you, but how long do you think it’ll take to get that thing back up and running?”  


“Y-You’re welcome, uh, Syrup?” She asked, glancing quickly at him from the wall and earning a nod. “And, um, it-it shouldn’t take t-too long. M-Maybe an hour to g-get it running more e-efficiently. It, um, I think it used too much power b-before, so I’m g-going to fix that so it doesn’t b-break down again when we t-try changing everyone else back.” She said, nodding more to herself as she looked over to the machine and began working on it.  


Syrup and I sat in awkward silence, Razz brooding by our feet and the others doing their own thing. “Maybe we should go get clothes for everyone” I suggested, looking at my feet.  


“that’s not a bad idea” Syrup agreed, looking down at his own bare feet.  


We didn’t move. “Any ideas?” I asked after a minute.  


“not really” Syrup admitted.  


We sat in silence again. “Hey, Blue, do you still have clothes at your old home in Snowdin?” I called to the Underswap skelekit. He looked back at us, curiously trotting over and meowing in question. Honey came over as well.  


“Well, I’m not sure if you guys will be clothed or not when you turn back. Syrup obviously wasn’t, so I wanted to have something if that happens.” I explained to the two. If they did still have clothes at their old home, we would need both Blue’s and Honey’s since I doubted any of Blue’s things would fit any of the Papyruses. Blue meowed in understanding and nodded. “Are you okay with me breaking into your house and ransacking it?” I asked him, to be sure. He rolled his eyes but nodded nonetheless. “That cool with you, Honey?” I asked the other kit, earning a nod. “Cool, Syrup wanna come with? Depending on how much loot we get I may need an extra hand.” I asked, standing up and stretching. Hard floors aren't the most comfortable.  


“heh, sure. let’s go start in our life of crime. razz’ll bail us outta jail if we get caught” Syrup agreed, grinning when his brother shot him a dirty look.  


“We won’t get caught” I said, grinning as well. “Undyne, we’ll be back.” I called to the scientist, earning a distracted ‘okay’ as Syrup and I walked out of the lab. We were put in sweltering heat immediately and I briefly considered just saying fuck it and letting the skeletons deal without having clothes. But then I remembered that there was stuff to steal and decided against it.  


“How are you not dying?” I asked, wiping sweat off my forehead as we passed by a particularly large lava pool. “And why can’t we just take a shortcut?”  


“i am a skeleton, so therefor am already dead.” Syrup told me, though I saw perspiration beading on his own skull. “and you said undyne probably has cams everywhere watching us and she doesn’t need to know we’re from an alternate universe.” He said reasonably. “if she hasn't figured out already” He mumbled. I groaned and dragged on.  


I saw a water jug with cups and most importantly, water. I grabbed a paper cup and poured myself water, chugging it down and getting another cupful. Syrup got his own cup and when he was done, tossed it into the lava. “Couldn’t that be considered littering?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at him. He shrugged and we continued on. As soon as we passed into the next area, the water from my cup evaporated. The cup promptly burst into flames. I stared at it and then at Syrup who took it and chucked it into the lava with a ‘well it would have burned anyways’.  


We passed into Waterfall, the temperature dropping and the humidity rising. I was thankful for the cooler air, but I didn’t so much enjoy the high humidity. Syrup seemed unaffected and we talked about why as we walked through Waterfall. We passed by a sentry station, Snowdin just in front of us and blowing cold air into the cave like entrance to Waterfall. “Aw man, the good old days, huh?” I said, stepping into the frosty air and enjoying its sting. I smiled as Syrup hummed and we walked on.  


We finally got to Blue’s and Honey’s house. It looked a lot like the one from our own Underground, just better kept. Syrup hummed again and I looked back at him. He was looking at the house like he was reminiscing. “Sad that I broke the Barrier and got you guys to the Surface?” I asked, nudging him in the side and breaking him out of whatever reverie he had been having.  


He grinned, shaking his head. “not at all sweetness. i was just thinkin’s all.”  


“Well? What about?” I asked, looking at him curiously as we moved up towards the front door.  


“oh, things. ready to commit your first felony?” He asked, changing the subject and grinning at me as we stood at the door. I stared him dead in the eye as I turned the knob and let the door swing open.  


“Hell yeah”  


“my baby’s all grown up, already breaking into homes and robbing them.” Syrup cooed as we dug around in the Underswap bros’ closets, pulling out left over clothing items that hadn’t made it to the surface. “before you know it she’ll be a full time criminal. committing arson, robbing banks. i couldn’t be prouder” He continued on, tossing an orange hoodie onto the floor.  


I snickered. “How do you know I haven’t already been doing those things?” I asked back, throwing an old pair of Honey’s shoes out into the open.  


“then i’m even more proud. i couldn’t be a happier parent”  


“Well if that’s the case I should probably let you know that my illegal drug business is booming. I also became the head of the mafia and now have at least fifty people at my beck and call.”  


“just be careful of the other mafias, hun, and don’t let your buyers know where you live.” Syrup advised me, tossing one last pair of shorts out of Honey’s closet and closing its doors. I grabbed the pile of clothes on the floor and went out into the hallway, Syrup following and picking up the other pile we had created from ransacking Blue’s old closet.  


“I won’t, only my meme buyers know where we live.” I agreed, tramping down the stairs and into the empty living room. I did a cursory glance into the kitchen and saw there were only empty cupboards and a tall sink. They really did move everything out, which is why I was surprised they still had clothes here.  


“you still deal memes?” Syrup asked, voice amused as he waited for me by the door.  


I nodded as I left the kitchen. “Yep, it’s a good business. My buyers know me and stayed loyal since my time Underground. And I’ll have you know I only deal in the best, most relevant memes so my buyers can stay up to date in our ever changing world.”  


Syrup chuckled and shook his head as we left the Underswap household and entered the frosty cold of Snowdin again. We talked about the best crimes to commit and the best ways to get away with them as we traversed Snowdin, Waterfall, and eventually Hotland. We arrived back at Undyne’s lab within the hour.  


“Oh, y-you both have g-great timing, I just got the m-machine fixed and was about to activate it with Papyrus, er, Honey” Undyne told us as we entered the lab, dropping the clothing we had stolen in a pile against the wall close to the machine. Blue pounced on it and buried himself in the clothing excitedly. Syrup had decided just my sweatshirt was fine and hadn’t bothered to use any of the clothing we had painstakingly gathered.  


Undyne fired up the machine, it running smoothly this time, though the whirring was still there, and a slightly dazed Honey walked out. He was just as, dare I say, bare-bones, as Syrup had been. I laughed at my own joke and earned a few strange looks as Honey grabbed one of his sweatshirts and shorts, Blue making an adorable half purr half meow from within the clothing pile that Honey chuckled at. After he had slipped his clothes on he grabbed his worn out looking sneakers and put those on as well. I was suddenly reminded of something as Blue happily bounced into the machine next.  


“So, what did happen to turn you guys into cats?” I asked the two skeletons as the machine whirred and stopped again. Blue (the skeleton) bounced happily out and took some of his old clothes from the pile before putting them on. Apparently a bandanna had been tucked inside the short sleeved grey shirt Blue had chosen and the smol bean happily tied it around his neck. Fell took the machine next.  


Honey and Syrup turned their attention to me as the machine fired up again, Blue joining us by jumping onto his brother before noticing the question hanging in the air. He tilted his head curiously. “we’re not too sure, kid.” Honey decided to answer me with a shrug. “we were all out back in syrup’s shed tinkering with his machine, hopin maybe we’d be able to figure out a way to fix it that would let us access each other’s universes without the help of ink or someone else every time.”  


“but then error came outta nowhere and someone must have been dealing with something sensitive and it blew up on us. next thing, we’re all, uh, cats” Syrup took over, rubbing the back of his skull with a light flush again.  


“AND THEN WE REMEMBERED YOU WEREN’T A PART OF THE BLAST, MISS --, SO WE WENT LOOKING FOR YOU SO YOU COULD HELP! AND YOU DID! THANK YOU!” Blue finished, beaming at me.  


“Oh, yeah. No problem, I guess. But why cats?” I asked, crossing my arms and looking at the two taller skeletons in confusion. An explosion I could believe, but why would it turn them into cats?

~~"because the author needed some vaguely explainable reason for this story arc"~~

"no idea. i'm going to have to mess with the machine when we get back and try and figure out what happened." Syrup said, shrugging.

I hummed and looked towards the machine where Razz was now entering after a brief fight with Red. Fell had begrudgingly taken one of Honey’s sweatshirts and was wearing it with his arms crossed and a sour look on his face. _Apparently he doesn't feel a need for pants._ I thought. Granted, the sweatshirt went down far enough to cover his pelvis and he was a skeleton, but I just thought it was strange. _I say as Syrup is wearing nothing but my coat tied around his hips._

_All of my friends are complete weirdos._

Razz got out of the machine and dug through the pile of clothes while Red took his turn. He put on an outfit similar to Blue’s, the resemblance between the two certainly a lot clearer as he walked over to our little group with as much of a sour look as Fell had. “No need to be so blue, Razz” I said, grinning at the skeleton.  


“I will impale you”  


“with that dick!” Red shouted as he exited the machine. Undyne flushed furiously and a resounding smack echoed in the room as Fell hit his brother in the back of the head. Red chuckled, completely ignoring Razz’s icy glare and Syrup’s own dead look as he took one of Honey’s sweatshirts and put it on, it falling well past his knees.  


“Anyways, what’s for dinner tonight?” I asked, changing the subject to something completely different.  


“Probably something easy. I couldn’t exactly take anything out this morning and I know you most certainly didn’t.” Razz told me, his sockets narrowed as he turned his attention back to me.  


“oh? how about pasta?” Syrup suggested.  


“I SECOND THAT SUGGESTION!” Papyrus called out. He was already dressed in one of Honey’s sweatshirts and a pair of shorts that fell just above his knees.  


“YOU’RE BOTH IDIOTS! OBVIOUSLY LASAGNA IS BETTER!” Fell argued.  


“mm, i dunno. i gotta go with syrup and paps on that one, fell. pasta is pretty good” Honey said, shrugging.  


“NONE OF YOU ARE EATING AT MY HOUSE!” Razz yelled at the three, glaring at all of them separately.  


“AW, I THOUGHT WE COULD HAVE A CELEBRATORY MEAL TO, YOU KNOW, CELEBRATE NO LONGER BEING ADORABLE KITTENS?” Papyrus said, seeming downcast.  


Razz huffed. No on was able to deny a sad Papyrus. “Fine, but I will be the one cooking. And if any of you try and interrupt me while I do you will not be getting dinner.” He warned, glaring at the three. They all agreed, however reluctantly, and by that time everyone was back to normal.  


“THANK YOU AGAIN, UNDYNE!” Blue called, starting off the goodbyes as we prepared to leave the scientist’s lab. Undyne had told us all she was going to be sticking around the lab a little longer to take care of some things so we would be walking to the Barrier on our own.  


“YES, THANK YOU VERY MUCH! I APPRECIATE YOU HELPING US TO NOT BE FELINES ANY LONGER!” Papyrus added, beaming at the scientist. 

She flushed under the attention. "It, w-wasn't a problem. Just, um, t-try not to get into these situations again, p-please?"  


“nyeh heh, we'll try not to, ‘dyne. thanks for the help, means a lot. and if you ever need help with anything let me know” Honey said. Eventually we left, thanking the scientist one last time before re-entering the death heat on our way out of the Underground.


	18. Shorts 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More garbage I'm sorry

“hmm” Syrup hummed as he studied the menu, taking _forever_ in deciding what he wanted to order. Razz groaned and I was laying over the table boredly.  


“Syrup, c’mon, it doesn’t take five hours to choose a meal” I groaned, tearing little bits off my napkin. We had already sent the waitress away twice.  


“i need to make sure i get something i’ll like” He replied, ruffling my hair and turning the page of the menu.  


“This is why I don’t go out to eat with you” Razz grumbled, drumming his fingers on the table impatiently.  


“God, I wish they would stop letting those things into public places. They’re disgusting” Someone spoke up from a booth across from us. I spared them a glance and saw them glaring at out table. I noticed Razz and Syrup were a bit more tense at this. “And that girl is willingly sitting with them. She’s one of the worst kinds of people.” I grinned at them and waggled my brows. They scoffed. The waitress came by again, blocking our view from the rude patron who would do better to just keep their big mouth shut.  


“Are you ready to order?”  


“Yes, ohmygod, please” I said, sitting up and giving the waitress my order. Razz gave his own order and we all looked at Syrup. He sweated under the pressure and finally blurted out his order and handed the waitress his menu. “Jesus, Syrup, was it really that hard?” I asked exasperatedly, turning to face the skeleton when the waitress had gone away to give in our orders.  


“yes” He answered, nodding and smirking.  


“There they go again, acting all lovey dovey and shit. Keep it to yourselves! No one wants to see that here!” The patron, quite boldly, yelled directly at us. They were glaring again and I had half a mind to go over there and shove their fork down their throat.  


“Why, you jelly?” I retorted, grinning at them as I entwined my fingers with Syrup’s. Razz groaned and Syrup’s face turned a dark orange.  


“You’re disgusting. Why do you socialize with those things?” The patron scoffed again, looking at me disgustedly.  


“Cause they’re my sluts” I replied, waggling my brows and smirking wider at the patron’s shocked look. Syrup’s face went entirely orange and Razz slammed his head on the table.  


The patron was silenced and they returned to their own meal, leaving quite shortly after and avoiding looking at or nearing our table like it was the plague. I laughed as we got our own food and dug in happily. Syrup’s face was a vivid orange the entire night.  


\--  


I banged on the door to the bathroom. “Razz! Get out! I need to shower!” I yelled through the door. I already had my towel and change of clothes in hand and I desperately needed to get a move on. I had to get to work and if I waited much longer I’d be running late.  


“You can wait” Razz called back. He had been taking forever in there doing God knows what. I heard the shower turn on.  


“Are you KIDDING ME?! What the fuck were you doing for the past half hour?!?!” I screamed, banging on the door again. I would have absolutely no time to look presentable if he was going to take a shower now!!  


“That is none of your business, trash mammal.” I heard the curtains slide closed and I banged my head against the door.  


After Razz proceeded to take twenty minutes off of my life and shorten my own time to get ready ( _he starts work later than I do!_ ) I finally got into the bathroom. I stripped and jumped into the shower, of course not getting any decent hot water since _someone_ used it all.

I cleaned and got out within five minutes, hurriedly drying off and dressing. I pulled my brush through my hair and pulled it into a ponytail to get it out of my face. I brushed my teeth and saw that I only had ten minutes before my shift started.  


I cursed Razz under my breath as I gathered my shit and chucked it into my room before heading downstairs and grabbing my bag and shoving my shoes on. I flipped the smug skeleton off as I left.

~

I woke up earlier than usual to get into the bathroom before Razz could. _He takes so fucking long. What the hell does he even do in there?_ I grumbled to myself as I got my clothes and towel together. There was no reason a skeleton, a _literal skeleton_ should be taking so long in the bathroom. 

_And there is no reason that I should be getting up this early_. 

I snuck out of my room towards the bathroom, having to stifle a yawn in case it somehow woke Razz up. _Squeak_. Except the floor creaked under my foot. _Traitor_. I cursed the house, frozen in the hallway and eyeing Razz’s door warily. I didn’t hear any movement and took it as my best chance to continue.  


I got to the bathroom and tried the knob. It was locked and there was light streaming out from underneath it. _You have to be kidding me._ I thought, glaring at the door and rapping my knuckles on the wood. “mm?” Syrup hummed from behind it.  


I groaned. _Don't tell me Syrup is going to take forever now too_. “You don’t take forever in the bathroom, do you, Syrup?” I asked, glancing back towards Razz’s door. There was still no movement from the inanimate object.  


“not as long as razz, which is why i’m guessing you got up earlier than normal” He told me, the water to the shower turning on. I grunted in affirmation and slid down against the wall next to the door to wait. Syrup chuckled and I heard the curtain close. “well, don’t worry, hun, i’ll be out of your hair in a few minutes.”  


As I waited I heard movement from Razz’s room. I watched his door and inched closer to the bathroom door. _I was here first._ The shower shut off just as Razz’s door opened. Razz left his room, closing his door behind him and beginning to walk over to the bathroom with his own change of clothes and towel. His eye lights found me on the floor and he jumped, clearly not expecting me. I narrowed my eyes at him. He smirked back at me and moved over to the other side of the bathroom door, waiting.  


The door opened and I faintly heard Syrup’s ‘oh boy’ before Razz tried sneaking in before I could. I swung out my leg and tripped him up, jumping up myself as Syrup teleported away. “I was here first!” I yelled, shouldering Razz out of the bathroom.  


“I got in here first!” Razz shouted back, pushing me back.  


“You go to work after I do! You can wait!” I yelled, gaining ground on the lighter skeleton. Something flashed in his eyes and he pushed me hard enough to make me stumble towards the sink. As I got my footing and was about to throw that brat out of the bathroom, the curtain to the shower closed. “You piece of shit!” I screamed as Razz tossed his shirt and pants over the shower and started the water.  


I sat down on the toilet, fuming as I waited for Razz to get out of the shower. After ten minutes, the water finally shut off. Razz stepped out of the shower, still just a skeleton, and yelped when he saw me. He actually yelped. _I’m never letting him live that one down._ “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?!?” He yelled at me, face blossoming into a violent purple as he yanked his towel off the sink counter and threw it around his torso. _He literally has nothing to hide._  


“I’m taking a shower.” I shot back, standing from the toilet and glaring at the skeleton.  


“GET OUT!” I decided not to heed Razz’s warning and stepped into the shower, closing the curtain with more force than was necessary and tossing my clothes over the top.  


“Give me my towel.” I requested, moving the curtain just enough when I was done to stick my hand out.  


“Go to hell” Razz shot back, chucking my towel over the top of the shower. I dried myself off and wrapped it around me, stepping out and seeing Razz fussing over something in the mirror. He hadn’t even dressed yet, he just had his towel wrapped around his pelvis as he glared at the mirror. I had no idea what he was doing.  


“What are you doing?” I asked, moving over to my own clothes and deciding not to waste the half hour I had gotten back this morning. It might have been a bit of an unconventional way to get those minutes back, but if Razz was going to be a pain in the ass about sharing bathroom time then it was what needed to be done. _Maybe this will teach him to share the bathroom more._ For some reason I doubted that and resolved to begin taking my showers at night.  


“None of your business, idiot. And go dress in your own room, I don’t want to look at your gross human body.” Razz told me, glaring harder at the mirror as I dressed.  


“I will not get locked out of the bathroom again, so deal with it.” I retorted, already finished dressing. I chucked my old clothes and towel into the corner and moved over to the sink to brush my teeth and hair. Razz begrudgingly shared the space and by the time I finished getting ready, I still had plenty of time to go downstairs and eat before I had to leave.  


\--  


“Sans! Pay attention to me!” I cried out, lying down across the short skeleton. His purple eye lights looked down at me, brows crinkling in confusion.  


“Why did you call me Sans?” He didn’t even shove me off him, which proved he must have been very confused by the sudden event.  


“Because that’s your name?”  


“In the entire time of you knowing me you have not once called me Sans. It has always been Razz or some iteration of it. Are you feeling okay?” He asked, moving a hand to press against my forehead. I found it amusing that he thought I might be feverish or delusional.  


“I’m perfectly fine, Sansy. Why do you think I wouldn’t be?” I asked, looking up at him innocently.  


“Stop that. You’ve never called me Sans and it’s too weird to start now.” He complained, frowning as he took his hand off my forehead. “Papyrus, what did you do to the human?” He called out, looking out to the kitchen.  


“Papyrus didn’t do anything, Sans. Why are you so weirded out by this?” The tall skeleton stuck his head out of the kitchen, a curious look on his skull.  


“Don’t call him Papyrus either” Sans told me, frowning back down at me.  


“You called Papyrus Papyrus.” I pointed out, looking up at him.  


“Because I always have! You’ve never called us Sans or Papyrus and you can’t start now.” Sans growled at me, glaring now.  


“But that’s your name, Sans. And your brother is Papyrus. I thought you would like being called by your actual names instead of being constantly reminded by my stupid nicknames that you’re not the originals.” I said, meeting Sans’s glare with my gaze.  


“I don’t care about that! Do you think it matters that we’re not the ‘original’? Do you think I care? Because I don’t. Being the ‘original’ means nothing because this is _our_ universe and it doesn’t matter if it was created because of the original, it’s ours. And you calling us Sans and Papyrus isn’t going to change anything, so stop.”  


“not to mention that you’ve called us syrup and razz long before we even knew about the alternate realities.” Papyrus joined in the conversation, meandering over to the couch. “and, to be honest, i think syrup has kinda grown on me.” He said, shrugging as he sat down and smiled at me.  


“Exactly!” Sans agreed, nodding sharply to affirm his point and glaring at me again. “So don’t call me Sans again or Papyrus Papyrus.”  


I let this information sink in for a moment, both brothers watching me. I smirked and pushed myself up. “Alright, Snas”  


Razz screamed and Syrup laughed.  


\--  


“Get up, trash mammal!!” Razz yelled, _right_ next to my ear and scaring me half to death from the peaceful slumber I had just been rudely awoken from. I felt arms slide roughly under my legs and neck and I tensed, suddenly fearful as Razz all but lifted me out of my bed with seemingly no effort. I felt a lot more unstable in Razz’s hold than Syrup’s or anyone's who was _bigger_ than me and, scared for my safety, I grabbed onto his neck. He didn’t seem to care as he kicked my door open and I was exposed to the bright light of the rest of the house. I hissed and screwed my eyes shut as the light attempted to blind me.  


“Why the fuck are you carrying me? And why the hell did you wake me up at... “ I squinted an eye open at a clock “seven am?” _What an ungodly hour._  


“It is urgent business.” Was the only answer I got from the skeleton carrying me bridal style. I was still in my pajamas for God’s sake, he had better not be taking me anywhere important. Then again he better have had a good reason for waking me up via screaming at seven in the morning or I’d be one unhappy camper. Not that I’m very happy to begin with.  


Razz brought me into the kitchen, Syrup was already up, hardly, he was just barely staying awake at the kitchen table and started when Razz entered and dropped me off at a chair next to him. _If he just woke me up to sample his food I’m going to kill someone._ My thoughts were beginning to turn murderous as the late as fuck time I went to bed last night was kicking my ass right now. “I need you both to test this new recipe.”  


My eye twitched. “You did not just wake me up at seven in the morning to try out one of your stupid ‘improved’ breakfast burritos.”  


Razz looked at me and grinned. “I did”  


I shoved the table away, almost making Syrup fall to the floor in the process, and stomped off to the living room. I laid on top of the couch and pulled the blanket on its back over me. I heard footsteps enter the living room and a quiet chuckling. “Wake me up again and I will rip each of your fingers off individually.” I growled, meaning every word. Razz only chuckled again. “Do not fucking test me, I got three hours of sleep and I am more than ready to kill a man or anyone else who gets between me and my rest.”  


“Maybe this will teach you about going to bed at 4 am, hmm?” Razz’s voice was mocking.  


“I am an adult and can go to bed whenever the fuck I please.”  


“And I am an adult and can wake others up at my own risk whenever I please.”  


“Are we sure you're an adult Razz? Are we absolutely certain?” I bit back snarkily, my exhaustion making me more irritable than usual. But it was also entirely Razz’s fault for waking me up like an asshole.  


“I'm certainly older than you are. Both physically and mentally I believe.”  


I growled and got up, dragging the blanket with me. I glared at Razz and his smug ass smirk. “Where do you think you're going? You haven't sampled my recipe yet.” Razz asked, not moving to stop me as I went towards the stairs, intent on getting back to my bed.  


“I hope you choke and die” Razz blew air out of his nose in amusement and I flipped him off.  


He woke me up three hours later and I almost killed him. Lucky for him he was good at dodging.


	19. Halloween Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm _l a t e_

“This is Halloween. This is Halloween. Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!” I sang loudly, decorating the entire house with every remotely Halloween-ish thing I owned. I had already made several trips to different stores, mainly by myself. I did get dragged into one shopping trip by Alphys and Undyne who wanted advice on what would make Razz and Syrup the most uncomfortable and what would freak kids out the most. They ended up buying a lot of fake skeletons and Alphys found a creepy mask for herself and a fake chainsaw. I brought home some extra decorations and lights.  


“Shut up! You’ve been singing that for the past week!” Razz yelled at me. I threw some dark purple tinsel over him to get him in the spirit and started on a different song. Maybe some variety will help.  


“Spooky scary skeletons send shivers down your spine. Shrieking skulls will shock your soul and seal your doom tonight.” I sang, ignoring the angry little skell and continuing decorating. “Spooky scary skeletons speak with such a screech. You’ll shake and shudder in surprise when you hear these zombies shriek.” I tossed dark tinsel over Syrup as well when he joined the party.  


Syrup grinned as he joined in on the song. “we’re so sorry skeletons, you’re so misunderstood. you only want to socialize, but i don’t think we should.”  


“Cause spooky scary skeletons shout startling shrilly screams. They’ll sneak from their sarcophagus and just won’t leave you be!” Syrup and I continued singing loudly through the entire song. Razz tried chucking bones at us to no avail. He only stopped when he realized his rejection of the Halloween spirit meant us singing louder.  


“Hey! I just got a cool idea! Let’s go impale the outside of the house with bones!” I said, smiling excitedly at the idea. I personally think a bunch of bones (sharpened or not) on the outside of our house would look pretty cool!  


“We’re not ruining the house for your stupid holiday.” Razz denied, crossing his arms and glaring at me.  


“we can always just phase ‘em through” Syrup suggested, shrugging.  


“Go and waste your own magic then. I’m not joining your idiotic schemes.” Razz said, waving us off.  


“Hell yeah! And we can ask Alphys for a battle ax!”  


“Don’t ask Alphys for a battle ax. Knowing her she’d actually destroy our house.” Razz muttered.  


“Alright!” I agreed, knowing this was probably true. 

I went outside with Syrup and helped make some creative decisions on where to put the bones he summoned. We put one into a window, decided that we liked the idea, and then added a whole bunch of bones to Razz’s window. A few more were strewn around the front of our house, but the majority were in Razz’s window, making it look like he had been the target of some kind of attack. I was still trying to decide on the backstory for that, _would it be better if we said he went insane and impaled the walls himself? or should we say that a group of skeletons hunted him down to claim their rightful places as skeleton king this Halloween?_  


We had also decided against using sharp bones in our decorating, despite us keeping the bones high enough up that no one would feasibly be able to reach them, but we didn’t want any kids getting hurt on them. Or stupid adults. _Don’t need any lawsuits!_  


“We should definitely put some along the driveway. Like,” I gestured down the length of both sides of our little driveway. “along the sides.” I said, planning it out in my head. We already had a few things along the driveway, pumpkins being the main (I planned on forcing the brothers to participate in carving them at some point with me) along with a scarecrow and some tombstones. I intended to set out some eerie lighting later on and maybe rig up a fog machine the night of Halloween. Syrup hummed and two lines of bones sprouted from the ground along the sides of the driveway, reaching just below my knees. There was an unevenness to their heights that made it look better than if they were all the same.  


I nodded and moved the pumpkins that had gotten trapped behind the bones to the front of them. I briefly considered sitting them on top before realizing that they might get knocked off. I hummed, looking around at our decorations and decided we could use some more cobwebs and big spiders. I went to the house and peeked inside the door, grabbing the decoration stuff I had yet to find a place for. _I know I have cobwebs somewhere… Aha!_ I found a bag of spreadable cobweb and a few of those small, plastic spiders to go with it. I hummed, frowning, because I knew I had a big fuzzy spider somewhere that I really wanted to put out. I dug through my decorations but returned with no luck. _I’ll have to look for it later. I could have put it in the house somewhere without realizing._  


Syrup was sleeping on the driveway when I turned around. I wondered if it was just because he was lazy or if his magic use had drained him. I set my fake spiders down on the pavement and opened up the bag of cobwebs, looking for the best places to put it. I spotted the bones lining the driveway and pulled a small amount away from the bigger mass of webs and stretched it over a few of them. It didn’t stay very well, the bones were too smooth. I decided to put it in a tree near the driveway instead. It stuck to the bark and the branches much better than the bones.  


I also decided to apply a generous amount of cobwebs to the little graveyard I had created in our yard with some tombstones and little fence pieces that came with it for the specific purpose. It actually looked pretty spooky with the cobwebs. I decided it would look even better with a skeleton in it. I went back over to the driveway where Syrup was still napping and set the rest of the cobwebs down. I looked at the skeleton, figuring out the best way to pick him up and fit him in the tiny cemetery.  


_Bridal style's definitely the way to go_. I decided, inching my left hand under his knees and my right under his neck. I hoisted him up (he's not that heavy, being made of bone and all), and had to try not to drop him when his sockets shot open and he grabbed onto me, claws digging into my shoulders and his body tensing, making his lanky ass just that much more awkward to hold. I decided to ignore this in favor of walking over to the graveyard and carefully lowering the tall skeleton into it. “This is your new home” I told him, his expression more one of confusion now than the original fear it had been. I smiled at him and patted his skull before leaving him to become acquainted with his new place of residence.  


I picked up my cobwebs again and looked around. I decided to put most of it in trees and branches. Some decorated our mailbox and doors and I hoped the little spiders I put in them would freak someone out. _Even if that someone happens to be me._ Because I have done that more than once, put decorations out and then forgot where I put all of them and freaked myself out. _Good times._ I went back to the house to look for more things to put outside and to maybe find my giant spider. I saw Syrup snoozing in the graveyard, one of the smaller headstones over his face probably to block out the sun.  


I rummaged through my decorations and didn’t find much to put outside. There were still the lights and the fog machine to hook up, but those could wait until Halloween day. Very last second, I know, but I don’t need squirrels chewing through my lights again this year. I also didn’t find my giant spider which was disappointing. That was the one that always freaked people out the most. _Especially when you put it right over the main entrance/exit._ I pouted at the thought that I might not get to use my giant spider this year and stood up. It wouldn’t do good to go wasting time, it would hopefully show up eventually.  


I went upstairs to my room to waste time until it was time to go to the Halloween party that Asgore and Toriel were having. I might have given them the idea to host the thing and they agreed. Now basically every monster from the Underground had been invited (except Jerry) on the grounds of exploring human culture and just having a good time. Probably the best part of the whole thing was that it was a costume party. And I had just the costume set up for it.  


I heard the timer to the oven go off and checked the time. It was close enough to being time to leave. I pushed myself off my bedroom floor and opened up my door. “Razz! Are you and Syrup almost ready!” I shouted down the stairs, unwilling to actually go down them.  


“I am almost ready for this party that you somehow convinced the queen to have, but I have no idea where my useless brother is.” Razz called back. I left my room and went down the stairs, having an idea as to where Syrup was. Or, still was. The smell of burritos, _why burritos?_ , drifted from the kitchen as I passed through the living room to the door. I opened it and stepped outside, the sun slowly sinking in the sky and Syrup still napping in the graveyard. I went over to it, lifting Syrup up in the same manner as I had earlier. He opened his sockets a crack and grinned at me. I rolled my eyes but smiled back.  


I carried Syrup into the house and dropped him on the couch. Razz was bustling around the kitchen, packing his burritos neatly away into a Tupperware container and cleaning and putting away everything he had used to make them. I watched him as Syrup fell asleep again until he finally finished and came out into the living room. “Well, are you ready? Or are you just going to sit there watching me all day? I don’t need the queen to think less of me because we showed up late.” Razz said, clapping his hands together and rushing me along. It amused me that Razz still wanted to show off to Toriel even after she insisted he could treat her like everyone else. _Royalty is still royalty, I suppose._  


“Well you still have to get changed too. Chop chop, bone boy.” I said, grinning as Razz narrowed his eyes at me.  


“I am not making a fool of myself by dressing up for your ridiculous holiday.”  


“Everyone else is going to be in costume, Razz. Toriel was the one who wanted it that way.” I said, mocking disappointment. “But I guess if you don’t want to dress up…” I said, sighing and standing from the couch. Something in Razz’s eye lights flashed and he huffed, turning and going up the stairs and slamming his bedroom door closed behind him. I grinned and nudged Syrup awake. “C’mon, Syrup, we’re heading out soon.” I told him, earning a nod before he vanished from the couch. I went upstairs and closed my own bedroom door.  


I went back downstairs, decked out in full Pokemon trainer gear (hat, jacket, pants, sneakers, bag, and everything, not to mention a good couple of pokeball plushes that I had strapped to my belt as well as my DS with Pokemon Heart Gold in it). Syrup was already waiting and it sounded like Razz was still in his room. _And he calls me out for not being ready._ As I got into the living room, Syrup studied me, taking in my choice of costume before he started laughing. He was wearing a skeleton themed costume, the suit he was wearing being one of those with all the human bones on it like an x-ray and a skull mask hanging off the back of his head. I snorted at his own costume choice as Syrup caught his breath on the couch.  


“You could have just gone naked, honestly” I said, moving over to sit on the couch beside him.  


“that would be indecent” Syrup said, mocking shock as he looked at me with wide sockets and a hand over his rib cage. I squinted at him, smiling, and he broke, laughing again. “i do like your choice though. but i think you already caught ‘em all”  


“Yep, I am the real life Pokemon master. No one can take this title from me.” I said, nodding and smiling, happy that he understood the joke.  


“what about all the other humans from the other aus?” Syrup asked, grinning slyly at me.  


“Nope, I am the true master. One and only.” I denied happily.  


Razz came downstairs a minute or two later, dressed in a black cloak and fancy shirt with a white ascot and black pants and dress shoes. He had a frown over his teeth and watched Syrup and I suspiciously as we studied him. “didn’t take ya as the vampire type, bro” Syrup said, standing and stretching. A bone popped and he grinned when Razz shot him a dirty look.  


“I didn’t take you as the indecent type. Though I should have known better.” Razz replied, frowning as I stood as well.  


“Well, let’s go. We don’t need to be late.” I said, clapping my hands and pointing dramatically towards the door. Razz rolled his eye lights and went to the kitchen. He returned a few seconds later with his container of burritos. Syrup happily grabbed onto both of us and the world shifted.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the ending! I have too much written with no good place to cut off! 
> 
> Also, I missed the 1st because I didn't know if I wanted to post this yet because I'm still not done with it, but screw it! It's time to get in the Halloween spirit!


	20. Halloween Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alright, part two of Halloween is a go! Let's meet some other characters, because this isn't just about Razz and Syrup all the time.

The noise was almost immediate when Razz, Syrup, and I arrived at Toriel's house. It was clear there were already quite a few monsters already here. Razz pulled his arm away from Syrup and walked up to the door, knocking even though I was pretty sure no one would hear it over the music coming from inside. I hadn’t really taken Toriel as the party hard type, but I don’t really know what I should have expected since nearly the entire Underground was coming over.  


The door was yanked inwards as Syrup and I waited a little ways back. “WHAT’S UP, YOU FUCKIN PUNKS?!” Alphys, decked out in what I thought was a tattered pirate captain’s uniform, yelled, grabbing Razz and viciously rubbing her knuckles into his skull.  


“DON’T NOOGIE THE SKELETON!” Razz shouted back at her, valiantly keeping a hold of his food and struggling in Alphys’s grip.  


“HEY TORIEL! THE NERDS FINALLY SHOWED UP!” Alphys yelled to somewhere inside the house, not listening to Razz’s complaints. She watched the inside for a moment before moving to the side of the door (Razz still no closer to freedom) and grinned at Syrup and me. Toriel entered the doorway and looked outside appraisingly, her eyes landing on me and lighting up. She smiled and descended the stoop towards me, sweeping me into a strong embrace.  


“I am glad to see you, my child. It has been a while since you have bothered to visit. I wish you would come by more often. The brothers don’t require all of your time, do they?” Toriel said, not making it a question as she looked towards Syrup. 

He shrugged and Toriel rolled her eyes. “Nonetheless, I am happy to see you. I don’t think I quite understand your costume though.” Toriel said, looking down at me with calculating eyes. She herself was dressed in her old royal robes, dark cloak sweeping around both of us and nearly enveloping me in it. 

Despite my being even a little above average physically, Toriel still towered over me and easily covered my form with her own. I thought that if she really wanted, it wouldn’t be hard for her to kidnap me. _I’m surprised I survived my fight with her in the first place._  


“Leave the child alone, Dreemurr” Asgore’s deeper voice commanded from somewhere behind me. Toriel stiffened against me and she shot a harsh glare towards the door.  


“The last time I checked, Asgore, she was not yours to command.” Toriel replied, her arms tightening around me as I turned to look at Asgore. He, too, was dressed in his former robes and had leveled a disapproving glare at Toriel. Alphys looked awkward standing next to him and had retreated with Razz into the yard. There was a tense and uncomfortable silence as Asgore and Toriel stared each other down.  


I coughed awkwardly, slipping out of Toriel’s grip. “Well, um, it’s nice seeing you both, but I really think we should enjoy the party, right?” I asked. Both Toriel and Asgore looked at me with hard to read expressions and no one else seemed to want to step in.  


“heh, ya know, i think you’re right, sweetness.” Syrup spoke up, grinning nonchalantly as he all but picked me up and carried me into the house. Asgore started and followed in after us, watching me worriedly as Syrup continued through the throng of monsters that had gathered in the living room. Some were eating, others were talking over the loud music that Napstaton was DJing, and others were dancing. A few even said hi to me.  


“Papyrus, was it?” Asgore spoke when we got to the kitchen. It was empty other than appliances and a dining table with some chairs surrounding it. Syrup turned around with me still in his arms and hummed, grin on as he casually waited for Asgore to ask his question. “I believe -- can walk on her own, don’t you?” It was closer to a threat than a question, but it’s the thought that counts.  


Syrup hummed, seeming like he was contemplating Asgore’s not so hidden command and not letting me go. “mm, na. she’s my kid and she’s still figurin out herself. don’t wanna leave ‘er to herself all the time, that’s bad parenting.” Syrup denied, shaking his head. His grin twitched upwards when I rolled my eyes.  


Asgore bristled but kept his composure. “I do not believe my child is yours, Papyrus. After all, she fell into my care first. Not yours.”  


“you gave her up pretty easy” Syrup said, shrugging.  


Asgore’s eye twitched and I felt his magic being kept barely restrained. “And what would your brother have to say about your… child? As far as I knew, he did not approve of her.”  


“nah, sans loves ‘er too. we’re one big, happy family.” Syrup answered.  


“I heard my name. You had better not be talking about me behind my back.” Razz appeared in the kitchen’s door frame, eye lights suspicious as he looked at us.  


“Ah, yes, we were just speaking about your brother’s… child.” Asgore said, smiling wryly as he addressed Razz. Razz’s lights flickered over to me, still a captive in Syrup’s arms, before looking back to the former king.  


“What about her?” He asked guardedly, entering the kitchen fully.  


“I… I” Asgore seemed stunned and unsure how to continue. “I thought you disapproved of humans?”  


Razz frowned and crossed his arms. “I used to and still do in most cases, as I believe many monsters do, but the idiot who released us is, I believe, an occasional exception.”  


“Only occasional?” I butted into the conversation, a hand pressed over my heart to add dramatic effect. Syrup chuckled as Razz gave me a dead pan look.  


“Yes, well, either way, I believe it’s a bit… wrong to consider -- his child, don’t you?” Asgore asked, trying to persuade Razz. I saw Syrup roll his eyes.  


“Yes, I think I agree on that part” Toriel said, entering the room as well and looking coolly towards Syrup. Razz jumped to attention and Asgore bristled. Syrup seemed unaffected by the entire ordeal. 

There was uncomfortable silence for a moment and I was beginning to realize just how uncomfortable skeletons are. I squirmed in Syrup’s hold and jumped down. Everyone looked at me. I finger gunned my way back out into the party.  


I joined the masses in the living room and and started making my way over to the DJ booth where Nap was trying to fend off Temmie (who was dressed in mummy wrappings. Nap, naturally, was too cool to dress up) from overtaking his DJ job. Temmie was giving a valiant effort as she struggled against two of Nap’s four arms that were holding her back. The other two were busy DJing like nobody’s business. 

“You’re that human who set us free, aren’t you?” A nasally, annoying voice asked me, stopping me in my mission. I looked back to see _Jerry_ standing behind me with a haughty look. All of the other monsters had created a wide berth around him and basically left me to fend for myself.  


“Nope, don’t know who they are. Sorry, byeeeeee” I said, attempting to back into and dissolve into the crowd. My goal was no longer the DJ booth as I just hoped to escape the annoying UFO. 

A few monsters understood my struggle and tried to help me out to no avail as Jerry only followed, sneering. The other monsters groaned and gave me sympathetic looks. _Only can someone as bad as Jerry warrant sympathetic looks from the monsters of my universe._  


“Stop lying. Did I ask to be set free? The wifi here sucks. It was much better in the Underground.” Jerry complained.  


“Then go back, no one is going to miss you.” I replied, still weaving my way backwards through the crowd. They parted around us and half didn’t look my way. The others seemed like they understood my pain but weren’t about to rescue me.  


“The food also sucks. Why is most of it indigestible to me? I should be catered to at every possible moment. Don’t you humans know monsters can’t eat your gross food? I want more monster food. But only the kinds I like.” _He just keeps going._ I was surprised I had managed to deal with him when I went through the Underground. If I had chosen to kill anyone, it would have been him. _How was he not dusted, like, forever ago?_  


“Leave me alone” I said, finding myself at the food table. The few monsters that were there fled when they saw me. This was getting me nowhere. 

I looked through the crowd. There was enough space to maneuver to the kitchen. I ran through, hoping that someone there would save me from this hell. Jerry, of course, followed me as I made my way to the kitchen, earning me my fair share of space and sympathetic glances. Even those who I bumped into gave me annoyed glanced before understanding my situation. 

The crowd shifted behind me and I lost all sight of Jerry when I glanced back. 

If only that was enough to lose him.  


I ran into the kitchen and skidded to a halt, almost slamming into Razz as everyone else looked at me in confusion. “Eeey, Tori, just wondering, did you invite Jerry? Cause that bitch’s been bothering me since I left the kitchen.”  


“Who are you calling a bitch? Stupid human. I hate your kind you all think you're better than everyone else.” Speak of the devil and he shall come. _Fuck._  


“No, I did not.” Toriel spoke up as Razz looked back at the smaller monster in disgust. “In fact, I seem to recall expressly telling him _not_ to show up.” Toriel was looking at Jerry with that dangerous, powerful look in her eyes.  


“So what, I just don't get to party? That's unfair. I thought everyone called you a fair queen, guess they were wrong. I never liked you royals anyways, always thinking you're more powerful than the rest of us.” Jerry sneered, facing danger head on. I might be impressed if it were anyone else.  


“How wasn't he dusted ages ago?” Razz muttered as Toriel glared at the annoying monster.  


“Now, wouldn't it be best if you just… obeyed everyone's wishes and left? I am not sure how we can make it much clearer that you are it wanted here.” Asgore said, seeming thoughtful at this conundrum.  


I began backing away slowly as everyone’s attention was on Jerry and his was on them. Syrup noticed me and watched me leave with a grin. I winked at him and rejoined the mass in the living room. My goal was, once again the DJ booth where Nap had decided to take a break and just play some tracks that didn’t require monitoring. He still wasn’t letting Temmie anywhere near the setup. She sure was trying though. 

“Finally get rid of him?” A monster, a Whimsum, asked me, looking at me amusedly as I passed by them.  


“More or less, he’s in the kitchen probably about to get dusted. Tori sure isn’t happy he’s here.” I said.  


“Jesus, about time too. I don’t think anyone knows how he survived underground for so long.” The Whimsum said, shaking its head in annoyance. I nodded along and continued on my way, waving back to them as they rejoined their friends and I went towards the DJ booth.  


“Hey Nap, Tem, what’s up?” I asked when I got to the booth. Nap looked up at me from his phone, startled and giving Temmie enough leeway to jump onto the setup and start flicking buttons.  


“Get off that! You’re going to ruin my stuff!” Nap yelled at her, grabbing her off the setup and inspecting his things quickly to make sure it hadn’t been damaged. Temmie pouted.  


“So what’s been going on?” I prompted, leaning against the edge of the setup and attempting casual.  


“A whole shit ton, hon.” Nap answered me, finally giving me his attention.  


Temmie wriggled in his grasp. “That’s not a nice word!” She reprimanded. Nap rolled his eyes.  


“So the Surface has been busy then?” I asked.  


“You don’t know the half of it. I didn’t expect to go so big when we reached it, but here I am, loved by thousands. It’s a little stressful to have so much pressure put on you, but I guess that’s life now. Heh, oh well, least it pays well.” Nap said, resting his head in one of his hands against the edge of the setup.  


“Yep!” Temmie agreed enthusiastically, wriggling out of Nap’s grasp and jumping on my head. “And Tem got to go to college because of it! Now I can sell my super strong armor! Do you want to buy it? Only 9999G! That’s a really good deal!”  


“Tem, no one can afford that.” I said, looking up at her as she papped my head excitedly.  


“Well if you die a lot I can lower the price I guess.” She offered, looking back at me.  


“I don’t really plan on it.” I said, earning a pout. “Sorry, Tem. How has the Surface life been for you otherwise? I know I haven’t gotten the chance to talk to everyone as much as I would like to, sorry if it felt like I neglected you.” I asked, patting one of her paws that was hanging over my head.  


She lit up, papping my forehead again happily. “The Surface has been really fun! Everyone got a lot nicer, but Nappy still doesn’t let me DJ even though I am a very capable DJer.” She said, shooting a dirty look at the robot who rolled his eyes in response.  


“Your claws will ruin my stuff. And the last time I let you DJ you cost me a few hundred dollars in damage, not to mention making me have to apologize to everyone for the terrible experience.”  


“They just don’t know what real music is” Temmie huffed, deflating a bit against my head before perking up again. “Otherwise I’ve had fun! Nappy helped me pay for college and his concerts are fun to go to! I have missed you though. Maybe I can come over and visit sometimes? It would be nice to spend time together! Even if Tem doesn’t like the skeleton brothers much.” Temmie trailed off, looking towards the kitchen like Razz and Syrup might jump out at their mention.  


“That sounds good to me, Tem. And don’t worry about Sans and Papyrus too much, I won’t let them bother you.” I promised, smiling and patting her paw again. She smiled back at me and papped my forehead.  


“Speaking of, you’ll have to come to one of my concerts again. It has been a while since you’ve been and I obviously need the attention and ego boost.” Nap said, tone sarcastic but amusement in his voice. “I think everyone misses seeing you around, hon. Those brothers were smart scooping you up when they could and I’ll admit, I’m a little jealous that I didn’t think of it.” Nap said, smiling gently and pulling my cap down over my eyes.  


I pushed it back up with a small huff and returned the smile. “Of course, I’d be more than happy to spend more time with you guys. Lord knows you need a boost to that confidence of yours, Nappy.” Nap scoffed in mock offense. “It has been too long though, sorry I couldn’t get around sooner, a lot’s been going on. But when’s your next concert? I’ll definitely be there, if the tickets aren’t sold out already, that is.”  


“Oh, don’t worry about tickets, hon, I can cover for a friend. Temmie certainly doesn't need any extra spoiling. She's starting to get fat.” Nap said, leaning over and whispering behind his hand.  


“Tem is not fat!” Temmie denied.  


“Mhm” Nap hummed, raising a brow at the little monster on my head. She huffed. “Anyways, next concert’s in a week, next Saturday from now. Starting around five-ish I think, if you're free.”  


“I'm not doing anything, so sure. Gonna get me some VIP tickets? Maybe ones that let you meet the star after? I've heard he's a pretty cool guy.” I teased, grinning at Nap.  


“Obviously” Nap agreed, rolling his eyes and smiling. “I've heard that he's a real hunk. Might be a little full of himself though, you know how those TV stars get.”  


“Really? I've only heard good things. Pretty humble, keeps his fans in mind, generally a cool person. Napstaton is definitely one of the few stars who doesn't let his fame get to his head.” I said, nodding wisely. Temmie slid forward on my head as I did this. She had to right herself after the fact. “Not too sure about hunk though…” I said, looking thoughtfully out to the crowd.  


“Fair enough” Nap said, nodding.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the awkward ending, I have more written but I never know where to cut it off.


	21. Halloween Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 3 of shenanigans

“Hey, so Nap, a little off topic...” I said, earning a curious look from the robot. “Can I choose the next song?” I asked, grinning as Nap narrowed his eyes suspiciously at me.  


“My music isn’t good enough?” He asked, still squinting suspiciously at me. The music playing at the moment was one of his own songs. Actually, all of the music he played was his own, everyone loved it though and I thought it was always pretty good too.  


“Your music is great, Nap, there’s just a certain song I want to play. I think it will fit tonight’s gathering well.” I reassured him.  


“Alright” Nap drawled out suspiciously. He straightened from leaning on his setup and waved me to come behind it.  


The song that was playing ended and Nap put the rest of his playlist on hold. A few monsters realized the lack of music and looked over at us curiously. “Alright, -- wants to choose the next song so if it sucks it’s not my fault. You know who to blame.” Nap, very kindly, spoke over a small microphone he had. 

Nap gestured at the audio jack linked to his speakers and I happily took my phone out. Almost everyone in the living room was watching me curiously now and I laughed to myself as I hooked my phone up and chose my song. _Monster Mash_  


“No wait! Don’t let her do it!” Razz, too late, yelled out as he ran in from the kitchen. I winked at him as everyone, confused over my choice, began murmuring to each other.  


“C’mon you guys, it’s all in the spirit of Halloween. Enjoy the monster mash!” I called, smirking as Razz faltered and glanced back at the kitchen, seeming to be torn on what he wanted to do. There was silence and Nap rolled his eyes.  


“It’s not half bad” Someone muttered. The murmur carried throughout the group and a few began dancing again. 

The party got back into full swing, a chant of ‘monster mash’ rising in the air. I turned my smirk on Nap who shook his head. Razz seemed completely lost and he slowly backed away into the kitchen.  


“WHOOO! MONSTER MASH!” Alphys shouted, picking up the food table.  


“Not the food!” Someone cried and everyone ducked as the table was launched across the room. Food flew everywhere. There was screaming and destruction. And totally awesome music. 

Alphys cackled as monsters picked magical food off of themselves and attempted to get the magical drink off themselves.  


“Idiot! What if you damaged my equipment?!” Nap yelled, furious as he looked over his more delicate equipment for signs of damage. Luckily we had been out of range of the massacre of the food table.  


“I DIDN’T THOUGH, DID I, NERD?!” Alphys yelled back, cackling again. Nap grumbled under his breath and flipped the laughing dinosaur off.  


“Tem hopes the loud dinosaur doesn’t destroy the DJ stuff. Then Tem will never be able to pursue her dream of becoming a professional robot.” Tem voiced her concerns, looking down at the DJ gear worriedly.  


“Oh yeah? Are you gonna be a robot star like Nap?” I asked, looking up at her.  


“Yep! That’s the plan!” Tem agreed enthusiastically. “Tem just has to get the scary fish woman to make her a robot!”  


“Good luck with that” Nap muttered, joining us back behind the setup when he had determined everything was fine and still in working order. I looked at him questioningly, the last I had heard Undyne and Nap had been getting along fine. Well, as well as they could. 

Nap rolled his eyes. “Undyne hardly keeps my body in working condition. She gave me an upgrade to help with power conservation so I can stay in this form much longer without draining my energy stores, but other than that she pretty much threw me out to the curb when we hit the Surface.”  


“Why?” I asked, a little worried for the star who had been made into my friend along with many of the rest of the monsters.  


“Because I was made to kill humans, hon. When I lost in our fight Undyne decided to modify me to last longer for the next human since there was no way you'd be able to break the Barrier yourself. Go figures you do the impossible and Undyne’s done with me.” Nap explained, sighing and running a hand through his hair. 

Temmie laughed nervously. Nap didn't seem to notice. 

“It's been pretty annoying keeping up with maintenance but it could be worse I guess. I could be stuck without a body.” Nap told me, shrugging.  


“Shut up!” Nap’s cousin, Happstablook, yelled out from somewhere.  


“Make me!” Nap yelled back, earning a few odd stares. No one was too affected by it though because everyone knew the two didn't get along well despite being cousins. The whole story behind it is that Happstablook is jealous that he wasn't the one to get chosen for the whole robot program with Undyne when he had been searching for a body for forever. Apparently Nap had been on the other end of the spectrum and wasn't too interested in finding a body, but when Undyne found him first and promised a fully functioning robot body, well, how's a ghost supposed to refuse? 

I didn't really understand the whole ghosts wanting bodies thing, but it is what it is. At least neither of them got stuck in a dummy... 

“That’s rough," I said, bringing the subject back around to Nap's difficult job with maintenance. The robot star looked back at me. "but, uh, at least you have Temmie to help? And if you need you can call me too and I can try and do whatever if you need me to.” I said, shrugging uselessly. “Paps is pretty good with all that mechanical stuff too, so, uh yeah?” I said, again feeling helpless. There really wasn’t much I could do. I knew how to use a computer and stuff but magical technology was on an entirely different level.  


“Tem is great at helping!!” Temmie exclaimed, patting my head again with her soft paws.  


Nap's expression lightened and he snorted. “Yeah, real helpful when you drag my arms _further_ away from me. Not to mention the multiple times I’ve rebooted without a foot or hand because someone thought they would be fun to play hide and seek with.”  


“Tem doesn’t know what you’re talking about.” Temmie said, turning her nose up at the mere suggestion that she was anything but helpful.  


I laughed. “Well, uh, if you ever need, I guess I can lend a helping hand. I may not be great with magic tech, but I think I’m pretty good at hide and seek.” I said, smiling as Nap rolled his eyes and Temmie perked up.  


“Do you want to play hide and seek with me, --?” Temmie asked, looking down at me excitedly.  


“How about the next time I visit we can play? And maybe we can get Nap to play too.” I agreed, nodding and feeling Temmie squeeze my head happily.  


“Don’t pull me into this.” Nap mumbled as Temmie agreed. “And who invited you to my house?” He asked, turning a mock glare on me.  


“It’s Tem’s house too!”  


“Last I checked I was the one who paid all the bills. Temmie is just lucky I have money to spare since the whole armor selling business isn’t going as well as planned.”  


“Tem is trying!” Temmie argued. “But no one wants to pay 9999G”  


“Then lower the price” Nap deadpanned.  


“Only if they die a lot”  


“That’s not a very good marketing strategy.”  


“Yeah Tem, I don’t think everyone can SAVE and LOAD. I mean, even I can’t? So I think your plan is a little flawed.” I sided with Nap, looking up at Temmie on my head.  


“Then you pay 9999G. It’s good armor, I can’t just give it away for free.” Temmie explained, exasperated.  


“Tem, why would anyone need armor?” I asked, deadpanning as well. Nap had an I-told-you-so look on his face.  


“In case you get in a fight! Tem armor is really good! It can protect you from dying a lot!” Temmie said, patting my forehead again.  


“No one uses G anymore” I said, still deadpan.  


“Tem accepts other currency.”  


“Have you ever considered selling anything different?” I asked, trying to get the subject off the armor, which Tem was clearly very adamant about.  


“She tried selling pastries, but Muffet took her out of business pretty quickly.” Nap said, leaning against a hand again and looking a little bored. “And then she tried selling pub food and Grillby got on our case. Needless to say I didn’t want to deal with a lawsuit so the whole food thing was shut down.”  


“Didn’t you have your own brand of food in the Underground?” I asked, a little confused why they wouldn’t sell any NTT brand things on the Surface. It had been really popular in the Underground, so I didn’t see why it wouldn’t be up here.  


“Oh, we still sell NTT stuff. Well, I do, at least. But when I kindly offered for Temmie to take over the food business since I was busy with a lot of other shit, she refused.” Nap explained, glaring at Temmie.  


“Why?”  


“Because, apparently, my stuff isn’t good enough for her. She wanted her own brand, which, also apparently, means ripping off other brands.” Nap told me, earning a huff from the Tem atop my head.  


“You’re missing out on some good opportunities to roll in some dough, Tem.” I said, looking up at Temmie again and earning an annoyed look. Nap raised his eyebrows at her, awaiting her response.  


“Tem can do whatever she wants. Tem does not need patronizing from you two, she is a good business Tem on her own.” Tem said, huffing again and looking away from us. 

“Alright, alright.” I said, trying to pacify the situation and get off the topic. Obviously Tem was set in her ways. “Well, I think I’m going to go and get some food from the kitchen since the snack table was destroyed.” I glanced towards the carnage on one side of the room. There was magical food mush and drinks on the floor that gave off a slight glimmer. The table had folded over onto itself weirdly and the mostly empty containers that the food and drinks had been in cluttered the ground. Everyone avoided the general area.  


“Oh! Tem wants to come!” Temmie exclaimed, her paws squeezing my head lightly and breaking me from mourning the murder scene.  


“Alright, want anything, Nap?” I asked, looking over to the robot who returned my gaze. I knew it was a little silly to ask since he was a robot and didn’t need to eat anything, but I tried to be thoughtful sometimes.  


“I’m alright, hon. Thanks”  


“Alright” I waved at Nap and made my way to the kitchen with Temmie on my head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so very sorry this took so long to get out I had it written and everything but just completely forgot about it. Here we go, excuse time, life got in the way, go figures. The entirety of last week was ridiculously busy for me in a horrid mix of homework, band, and helping out with a drama club thing that I participated in. 
> 
> These are all just excuses, I know, but I hope you enjoyed this chapter~


	22. Halloween Part 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween everyone! This is the last part to this little mini story arc so not so regularly scheduled antics will begin again eventually~

“Hey Nerd!” _Oh jeez._ I ducked under Alphys’s grab, Temmie tightening her hold on my head.  


“Yes, Alphys?” I asked the dinosaur, looking sideways at her as Temmie righted herself and huffed.  


“You ever watch that anime I told you to? I need someone other than Undyne to vent about how trash it was.” Alphys asked, walking beside me to the kitchen.  


“It wasn’t that bad.” I argued, frowning a little. Alphys always liked to give out anime recommendations. For some reason, she always wanted me to watch the worst ones she could find. I never thought the day would come when I would no longer be phased by tentacle porn, but I’ve long since passed that.  


“That’s what Undyne said! God, you guys just don’t know good anime when you see it, because it obviously wasn’t that trash! Next time you come over we are marathoning the shit out of some anime.” Alphys promised, a glint in her eyes that told me I wouldn’t be getting out of it even if I didn’t go over of my own free will.  


“Okay” I sighed. It was just better to go along with it, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t try and drag someone down with me. “We should force Sans to watch it too.”  


“Already planning on it, punk, don’t worry.” Alphys said, grinning at me.  


We reached the kitchen and Alphys shoved my shoulder, probably meaning it in a friendly way even though she always did it too forcefully. “I expect you at my house tomorrow afternoon, four o’clock. And don’t forget either or I’ll personally hunt you down and force you to come over.” Alphys told me, narrowing her eyes at me. 

I nodded in agreement, knowing she completely meant it, and Alphys smiled and nodded before walking back out into the living room.  


“S-So you’re getting dragged into the anime marathon too, huh?” Undyne asked, a sly grin on her face as she looked over at me. She was the only other one in the kitchen besides Temmie and me, it seemed like everyone else had dispersed to enjoy the party.  


I nodded, moving over towards the pantry in hopes of finding something decent to eat. Toriel usually kept some decent monster snacks around, even if she didn’t eat them herself. “Yeah, I’m dragging Sans down with me though. I’m not going to be the only one to suffer through it.”  


“Hey, I-I’ll be there too. Really o-only Alphys will enjoy herself.” Undyne argued, frowning at me. I wasn’t completely sure what she was doing since she was just kind of leaving Toriel’s hot fridge open and was just standing there, but whatever.  


“I thought you liked anime.” I mentioned, looking at her oddly.  


“Y-Yeah, action anime, n-not all that girly shit Alphys w-watches.” Undyne told me, scoffing at the mere idea of it. 

It had been pretty out of the blue when I first met the two, but Alphys did seem to have a thing for romantic, fantasy, cat girl anime (even though she always ‘recommended’ that I watch hentais). 

Undyne on the other hand definitely preferred really gorey kinds of anime. I think she just recently got into Parasite. _I just hope it doesn’t spawn any crazy ideas of hers._ When she was watching Attack on Titan she got way too interested in cannibalism. Luckily she didn’t try anything with it, but you never know. I shuddered at the thought.  


“So do you know what Alphys wants to watch then?” I asked, distracting myself from the idea of Undyne going mad scientist on someone by looking back into the pantry.  


“No, she’ll probably ch-choose some hentai to gross Sans out though. W-We can hide out in my lab wh-when she does.” Undyne said, sharp teeth pulling into an innocent smile that didn’t really work.  


“Nice try, but I’m not participating in another one of your ‘experiments’. You’ll just have to use some other human that Alphys picks up off the street.” I denied, shooting a frown at her. 

Undyne had gotten better about not doing her experiments on random innocents and instead did whatever it was she did on criminals that Alphys picked up before they went to court or jail, but sometimes there were still incidents that almost got her caught.  


She never did, but I was worried one day I’d get some kind of summons to defend her as she sat at trial, which, unfortunately, would most likely only be a waste of time, since monsters, no matter their excuse, were almost always found at fault for whatever it was they did wrong. It could be the simplest thing, some misunderstanding with a person who happened to be an angry human, and that would not only send that specific monster away for who knows how long but would set monsters back as a whole to having to fight tooth and nail just to get back to where they had been.  


“I w-wouldn’t hurt you, th-those experiments ended, mostly.” She said, whispering the last part under her breath. 

I shot her an unamused look. 

“I-I’m just kidding! The Queen told me not to p-perform any dangerous experiments anymore b-because she doesn’t want monsters g-getting set back too far if I’m e-ever found out. The g-government approves of m-most of them anyways, so i-it’s not like I’m in t-too much danger and everyone I use g-gets let go just as healthy as th-they came in. Physically at least.” Undyne told me, waving her hands in front of her and chuckling nervously. 

I wasn’t too sure how I felt about the ‘physically healthy’ part, but let it slide. I rolled my eyes at her and she chuckled again, looking away and seeming to notice that the hot fridge was still open behind her. “Oh, h-hey, if you’re looking for something to eat, T-Toriel made some cinnamon butterscotch pie earlier if you want some.” Undyne told me, taking out the large pie and holding it up for me to see.  


“Thanks but I don’t want Tori getting mad at me for eating it.” I denied, glancing at the massive dessert and shaking my head. For some reason Toriel always made large amounts of everything. I wondered if it was because she ate as much or if she just liked to have extra all the time.  


“Sh-She won’t get mad at you. You are h-her favorite, after all, s-so I’m sure she w-won’t mind.” Undyne said, grinning mischievously again.  


“Can Tem have some too?” Temmie asked from atop my head, reminding me that she was still there. She had been awfully quiet during my conversation with Undyne. 

Undyne looked up at her, expression startled for a second as she seemed to realize the other monster’s presence as well.  


“Oh, s-sure Temmie, but --’s p-probably right. Maybe we should a-ask Toriel before w-we have any.” Undyne said, perspiration beginning to bead on her scales as her eyes flickered away from Temmie. She hastily put the pie back in the hot fridge and closed it. “I-um-I’m going to go f-find Alphys. S-See you.” Undyne said, something akin to guilt on her face as she quickly made her leave.  


I stayed for a few moments more, Tem watching after Undyne in silence while I finally decided on a snack that I thought was basically the monster equivalent of goldfish (even if the cheese cracker things were shaped like Nap). I closed the pantry doors and left the kitchen, handing a few of the crackers to Temmie as I looked around the living room, deciding where I might want to go next. 

“My child” _Oh, nevermind, guess I’m not going anywhere then._ I thought, nodding to Toriel as she came up to me, her cloak billowing behind her and the other monsters giving her a respectful berth. “If you are hungry, I made a cinnamon-butterscotch pie. It’s in the fridge, let me retrieve it.” The goat monster told me, sweeping past me and further into the kitchen. 

I didn’t argue since I was kind of hungry and always liked Toriel’s pies anyways. _Maybe she’ll send me home with some._ I thought, turning to watch as Toriel took out the massive dessert and set it on the counter. 

I thanked Toriel as she handed me an intimidatingly large slice of the pie that took up half of the plate it was on. “You are welcome, my child. If you ever want anything you can come to me. You know I am a much better cook than Asgore.” Toriel told me, her smile a little tight in what I thought was probably annoyance towards her former husband. 

I nodded in agreement, Toriel’s smile becoming more smug and a little genuine as she put the pie back in the fridge. I cut the end off the pie and scooped it up on my fork. It was just as good as the first time I had tried it. And, if I was being honest, Toriel was a better cook than Asgore. Asgore can make a pretty mean tea though. 

I thanked Toriel again for the pie before rejoining the party in living room. I cut a portion of the pie for Temmie who ate it happily. “You e-ended up stealing some?” I jumped when Undyne came out of nowhere, looking at the pie on my plate in shock. She looked up to me, the same expression of horror and amazement on her face. 

“Nah, I got the hookup from Toriel. Nice ta know you think I’m such a glutton I’d risk my life for it.” I said, taking another bite of the pie. 

“I would” Undyne mumbled, looking back at my pie in longing. She looked back up at me, expression serious. “D-Do you think Toriel w-would give me some?” 

“Maybe, go ask.” I suggested, shrugging and giving another bite of the pie to Temmie. Undyne’s gaze followed it up longingly before she looked away quickly, scales turning a light red. 

“R-Right. I’ll d-do that.” Undyne said, nodding and disappearing back into the mob of monsters. 

I traversed the mass of monsters back towards Nap’s booth, keeping my pie safe from moving bodies as best I could. I finally broke free of the group and let out a breath, glad that my pie was safe. 

I nodded towards Nap who waved lazily back, not DJing at the moment since everyone had decided they wanted to listen to more “Halloween” songs which meant my Halloween playlist was cranking out awesome tunes. Right now Thriller was playing. 

“Looks like you’ve got a few followers.” Nap said when I got close enough to hear him speak normally. He nodded behind me when I looked at him in confusion. I looked around and saw a few of the dogs from the dog pack watching me with large eyes. 

“Uh, no, go get your own, this pie is mine.” I said, frowning at the three who had followed me. 

Lesser Dog and Dogamy left without much complaint but Greater Dog apparently wasn’t giving up so easily. I raised my brow at him and he whimpered, eyes large and sad. I did my damnedest not to break under it, but fuck, it was just so _cute_. 

After a few seconds of fighting against those stupidly sad eyes I sighed deeply and Greater Dog wagged his tail, brightening up immediately as he knew he had won. I looked down at my pie sadly and took one last bite before handing it off. 

Greater Dog yipped happily as he took the plate and scampered off, disappearing back into the crowd. I wiped away a tear at the loss of the fantastic dessert and turned back to Nap who was smiling in amusement. 

“It’s a difficult thing trying to go against puppy dog eyes.” I defended, still despairing over the loss of the rest of my pie. There was still a lot left too. I hope Greater Dog enjoys it, at least. 

“At least it was good while we had it.” Temmie said, trying to cheer me up as she patted my head sympathetically. 

“Yeah” I agreed. “I’ll have to get the recipe from Toriel some time. Maybe I can make it myself. It probably won’t turn out as well though, I don’t have fire magic.” 

“You never know until you try.” Nap said, shrugging. 

“Yeah” I agreed, sighing. 

Nap was silent for a moment, eyes studying me. “What’s your costume, hon? I don’t think I recognize it.” He asked me, looking at me curiously. 

“Hm? Oh! I’m a Pokémon trainer! Well, heh, Pokémon _master_ at this point, if you catch my drift.” I said, grinning at the robot who only looked lost. His brows pulled together in confusion as he looked me over before he shook his head. 

“Alright, hon, sounds cool.” 

After that I spent most of the rest of the party talking with Nap and Temmie. 

Everyone had a great time except for Undyne who suffered the same fate with the pie that Toriel had given her as I had. At least the dog pack was happy and they were pretty good at ignoring Undyne’s silent sobs and Alphys’s not so silent passive aggressiveness towards them after she learned her wife’s pie had been conned from her. 

Both Toriel and Asgore ended up staying in completely opposite rooms as each other and when they were both in the living room at the same time they glared across the room at each other and made everyone nervous that a fight would break out over their heads. 

As for Razz and and Syrup I didn't really even see them, but the few times I did they seemed to be having a good time.

Overall, it was an enjoyable Halloween.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! I apologize for the... lack luster end, but I really couldn't think of much else. I hope you enjoyed nonetheless!


	23. Antics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus's deserve love and protection too, okay?

“The bean!” I shouted, tackling Syrup onto the couch, taking both of us down.  


“Why are you so loud all the time!” Razz shouted at me from the kitchen.  


“You were the one literally yelling everything back in the Underground, so I don’t want to hear it Mr. Capslock is reasonable for every situation!” I yelled back, Syrup going limp underneath me as he accepted his demise.  


“I was not always yelling!”  


“Yes you were! And it was always in Comic Sans too, like, what the fuck?! I could never take you seriously. Comic Sans is such a stupid font.”  


“Hey woah, that’s completely uncalled for. I can’t help how I talk or what my text looks like, alright? At least I didn’t get stuck with some boring ass font like Arial or Papyrus.”  


“aw, wait, that’s mean.” Syrup pouted under me.  


“Yeah, Razz, completely uncalled for. Papyrus is a way better font than Comic Sans anyways.”  


“It is not!”  


“Whatever Razz, Syrup is still cuter than you.” I said, hugging the tall skeleton tightly as he snorted.  


“I’m way cuter than my brother!” Razz yelled, stomping into the living room and glaring at me. Syrup and I both stared at him and waited for it to sink in.  


…  


“Wait! No! Fuck! I’m not cute! And neither is my stupid brother! We killed a countless amount of monsters in the Underground! We tried to kill you! We are anything but cute!” Razz shouted, face lighting up a bright purple as Syrup and I tried to hold in our laughter.  


“you’re right bro, you’re not cute.” Syrup agreed, smiling at Razz.  


“Exactly!” It took a moment again. “Fuck you! I’m incredible!”  


“never said you weren’t, comic sans.” _Ooh, Syrup is treading in dangerous water._ I jumped off the couch as a bone went through it and slammed against the hardwood flooring behind it. 

“nyeh heh, nice try, capslock” Syrup snickered, standing near the stairs. 

He teleported away when another bone embedded itself in the railing. 

“getting closer, _m’lord._ ” 

A barrage of bones almost ran Syrup and me over when he teleported in front of me. He grabbed onto me and I felt the familiar tug of his magic as the world jumped and we landed upstairs, looking over the banister. 

“what’s wrong, m’lord? you used to be able to hit me the first time in. granted, i used to _let_ you, but i still expected more of a challenge from the head of the royal guard.”  


“Oh my God, Syrup, are you trying to get us killed?” I asked the skeleton, looking at him in a mixture of amusement and incredulity. I had seen him mess with Razz before, but never to this level. It was a little scary, honestly.  


“i wouldn’t let you get hurt, sweetness.” He said, glancing back at me with a smile. He looked back over the banister where Razz had summoned a group of blasters and smirked. “‘m just havin some fun is all.” 

Syrup teleported back downstairs in front of his brother and tapped his nasal ridge before teleporting away again.  


“Brother, where are you going? I thought you just wanted to have some fun.” Razz called, eerily cheerful as he smiled and looked around the room. The blasters were still summoned, fully charged now and with their jaws closed as they waited for their command to release the powerful magic. 

A tap on the window made Razz whirl towards it, eye blazing with magic.  


“just thought i’d get some fresh air. don’t wanna go destroyin the house any more than you already do, m’lord.” Syrup said through it, leaning against it casually while a lollipop he had gotten from thin air hung from his teeth. _So badass._ I thought, smirking myself as I walked down the stairs and followed Razz outside, interested to see whatever kind of battle was going to go on between the two brothers.  


“You aren’t always as stupid as you let on, mutt. I’m interested to see if your fighting has improved at all or if you’ll just dodge like always.” Razz said, a smirk playing over his teeth as the blasters opened their maws. 

Powerful lasers burned through the earth, completely ruining the grass. _We should be doing this in Alphys’s yard._ I shook my head sadly at the loss of our lawn as the debris cleared, Syrup nowhere to be seen.  


“i appreciate the compliment, m’lord, but i’m afraid i have set myself up to disappoint once again. dodging is essential to my fighting technique.” Syrup said from behind Razz, summoning his own wave of bones and sending them at the shorter skeleton. Razz turned towards him and maneuvered the maze expertly, destroying as many bones as he could with summoned attacks of his own.  


“I see, that is rather disappointing. I would have expected more from my only brother.” _This is like an over the top TV drama. I like it._ I thought, standing from the step and going back into the house. 

I heard more sounds of our lawn being destroyed and saw flashes of light through the windows in the kitchen as I microwaved a bag of popcorn. The microwave beeped and I took the bag out, popping it open and pouring the popped kernels into a bowl. 

I went back outside and sat down on the stoop, eating my popcorn and watching the fight with intense interest.  


Syrup surrounded Razz with blasters of his own, each charging up and releasing deadly beams. Razz destroyed a few with bones that ripped out of the ground and dodged out of the way of the rest, sending a volley of blue bones towards Syrup. 

Syrup froze, too late to teleport away, and the bones passed harmlessly through him, turning his SOUL blue. The tall skeleton was thrown backwards but he landed on his feet, skidding to a halt and fighting against Razz’s magic trying to push him further back and into a wall of bone attacks only a few feet away. 

Syrup narrowed his sockets and disappeared. Razz frowned and turned around, his blue magic still encasing Syrup’s SOUL as he appeared behind him. “Teleportation does not negate the effects of blue magic, Papyrus.”  


“nyeh heh” Syrup chuckled, seeming to struggle in holding his ground as Razz kept the pressure on. “just wanted to get away from those bones, bro.” He said, summoning his own blue attack and sending it at Razz.  


“Oh, you suck.”  


“love you too, bro.”  


\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


“Did you know that all Papyruses need to be protected?” I asked Syrup, leaning back against him and finally getting a chance to mess with his hands instead of Razz’s. They were pretty similar, his phalanges just didn’t end in as sharp of points. There were also a few more chips and cracks along them.  


“why’s that, hun?” Syrup asked me, his voice muffled since he had his head resting against the top of my own.  


“Because you’re all cinnamon buns.” I said seriously, turning his hand over in mine and bending his fingers inward.  


“i don’t know about that one, sweetness.” He sounded unsure, bringing his skull off my head slightly to watch me move his hand back and forth. It seemed like his wrist was a normal one, even if it didn’t have muscles and skin like a normal one.  


“It’s true though.” I argued, frowning as I dropped his right hand and picked his left up. “You guys are great and something from the original carried over into all of you, even you, who should, theoretically, be the one most unlike original Papyrus. Because our universe is just the swapped version of Underfell, right? And we’ve met Underfell and they’re not like us. Red isn’t you and Fell isn’t Razz. You guys are so different from each other even though you should be like Red but as a Papyrus and Razz should be like Fell but as a Sans. But you’re not and neither is Razz. I like you guys better.” I muttered, frowning still as I pressed my hand against Syrup’s, testing the size difference. His was thinner but much longer than my own.  


“well, honey, you live in this universe and we don’t really know underfell _that_ well. i’m sure if you lived in their universe you would be saying the same thing about us.” Syrup told me, resting his chin against my head again and capturing my hand to play with. He bent my fingers inwards as I frowned down at our hands.  


“That’s not the point, Syrup. Red has always been kind of an asshole and Fell has always been loud. You never were and Razz learned to calm down. Like I said, something carried over from the original universe to make everyone different. Because, technically, everyone should be the same. Underswap should just be Undertale but with personalities swapped. Underfell should just be a more violent version of Undertale. We should be just a violent version of Underswap or a swapped version of Underfell. But we’re not and Underswap and Underfell aren’t just copies of the original with a key component changed. Everyone is different. Everyone has a personality. Blue is not just Papyrus in Sans’s body. You are not just a more violent version of Honey, nor are you Red in Papyrus’s body. You are an individual with a little bit of personality mixed in from every universe that made ours and a personality that you developed on your own. I don’t know where I’m going with this.” I said, sighing as Syrup kneaded my hand, making contact with the bones.  


Syrup hummed, the vibration rumbling against my back. “i understand what you’re saying, hun. it’s strange to think about, but you’re right, we are all different and unique, even if we shouldn’t be.”  


“So you agree that all Papyruses should be protected?”  


Syrup huffed against my head in amusement, lacing his fingers through mine. “i’m supposed to be the one protecting you.”  


“No, you and every other Papyrus needs to be protected. You are all too soft and squishy to say otherwise.” I said, shaking my head.  


“alright sweetness, if it makes you happy.”

~~ 

“Papyrus Protection Squad is a go! Move out, team! Protect those Papyruses!”  


“We will not let any harm come to the Papyruses! They must be spared from all hardships!”  


“I’m not giving Papy money to support his smoking habit!”  


“Most hardships then!”  


“Yeah!”  


“bro, what’re you and the human doin in there?”  


“We’ve been compromised! Run for your lives!”  


“Papy! Go away! This is a secret meeting!”  


“a secret meeting in your closet?”  


“Yes! Where else do you expect me to have my secret meetings?”  


“Obviously we can’t use your closet anymore, Blue. We’re going to have to find a safer place to conduct our meetings.”  


“You’re right, human! And if we get more members we will definitely need more space to accommodate everyone!”  


“i’ll join.”  


“Sans! Perfect! Can you teleport us somewhere more secure? We can’t have Papy listening in on our conversations.”  


“wait, bro-”  


“sure thing. see ya ‘round, honey.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's gotten just suddenly colder around where I live and it's weird because it was such a sudden jump but now it's what fall is supposed to be? It also snowed a little the other day which was really exciting, but we lost power thanks to a wind storm like two weeks ago (it only lasted for like two days and we got the day off school which was pretty awesome, but no power sucks). Sick season is going around too which is totally lame, I've had a cough all day and my nose was stuffy and running yesterday. So to all my friends experiencing cold season (both weather and illness wise) I hope you stay warm and well.
> 
> P.S. Merry early Christmas! Everyone keeps yelling at me because they say it's Thanksgiving time, but I don't care! 
> 
> P.P.S. The Papyrus Protection Squad (get it, P.P.S. is the acronym for it) is always accepting members! Take care of those tol cinnamon buns!


	24. Battle Royale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Think of it like one of those "test your strength" kinds of things.

“Oh God, she’s already taken down half of our fighting force! We need to get out of here. She’s unstoppable.”  


“No, we can do it. Don’t give up now, that’s what she wants. She has to be getting tired. Just-Just give it all you’ve got! Show no mercy!”  


“I don’t want to die!”  


“She’s not even killing, you fool! She’s sparing everyone!”  


“Commander, she’s taken down Error!”  


“Fuck, already? But he was supposed to buy us more time! Razz, get out there. Maybe a familiar face will throw her off.”  


“I will show her what a real fight is. Don’t bother sending anyone in after me. This is her end.”  


…  


“He’s going to die out there, sir.”  


“It’s a sacrifice we have to make.”  


~~ 

“Heh, you put up a good fight, Error.” I said, smiling as I crouched down beside the glitchy skeleton. He rolled his eye lights and grumbled something under his breath, looking away from me. 

“Don’t be sore about it, you really did. Your fighting style was definitely the most interesting one I’ve encountered so far and it took me a lot longer to figure out how to get past it. I think trying to catch me with your strings could have definitely turned out really poorly in my favor but since I knew what to look out for I was able to get out of the way in time. I think you could definitely win in a fight against someone who doesn’t know what to watch out for though, those things are deadly.” I told him, smiling wider as a light blue flush spread over his cheekbones.  


“Yeah, yeah. Just get out of here. The others are still waiting up ahead.” Error told me, still avoiding eye contact as he huffed.  


“Alright, see ya, Error.” I agreed, nodding and standing up. 

I hummed as I continued onwards, curious as to who I would face next. Papyrus had been my first confrontation in this strange game Ink had devised to test how strong everyone was. I was the first to go through the gauntlet, the skeletons from each universe facing off against me to see how far I could get before it would move onto the next challenger to see how far they could get. Papyrus had actually been a bit more challenging than I had expected him to be, but the sweetheart was easy to persuade into accepting my mercy when I refused to fight him so his fight hadn’t lasted overly long.  


After that I had joined a confrontation with Blue who actually put up quite the fight for such a marshmallow which made me realize I definitely shouldn’t judge people based on their appearances. Like Papyrus though, his downfall was how easily he accepted mercy and how much faith he put in others to be a good person. 

I had silently made a resolve to protect both of them from people who might have less than good intentions. They were knowledgeable enough though, so I knew they could take care of themselves, but it bothered me to even be thinking that people might want to hurt them.  


I had then gone on to fight against Sans and Honey, both of whom didn’t really put that much effort into their battles but did send me for a loop with a few attacks I hadn’t been expecting. I didn’t really take much damage and they had both accepted my mercy fairly early into their respective battles. 

That was when I had moved onto Error’s battle, which I hadn’t been expecting at all. 

It had kind of thrown me off when I saw him waiting for me since I thought for sure he and Ink wouldn’t have battled at all or they would have been the last two to go. 

Error's battle had lasted a lot longer than the others I had battled previously. He had been a lot harder to convince into accepting mercy and he really didn’t seem to hold back all that much on his attacks which left me to take more damage than I was comfortable with and had exhausted me to the point where if he hadn’t been getting tired as well, he most likely would have won.  


I continued my walk through the woods where Ink had been adamant about setting up this little challenge. I really wished we had been given some healing items, but that was against the rules. Basically, it was fight until you dropped, since killing was strictly forbidden. 

I hummed to myself as I came across a clearing, following the arrows that Ink had painted everywhere so everyone would know where to go. I saw Razz waiting for me, his eye lights following the arc of a bone he was tossing up and down. 

I grinned as I stepped into the clearing, a twig snapping and the bone flying over where my head had been. It embedded itself in a nearby tree as my SOUL was pulled from my chest.  


~ 

“Heheh, nice try Razz, but I know all your tricks.” I taunted, stalling on my turn so I could catch my breath. 

The battle had been going on for a little while now and Razz was definitely banking on the fact that he could exhaust me. Razz only grinned in return as I selected the mercy option and gave him his turn. 

A wall of bones shot out of the ground in front of me. I heard almost a second too late a blaster charging behind me and I jumped out of the way just as it fired. I sucked in a breath as it scorched my back and skidded to a stop just before the wall ended.  


“Why don’t we just end this fight so I can move on? Or do you really think you’re going to win?” I called after taking a second to get my breath. 

I ran to the other side of the wall formation as a blaster charged and shot through where I had just been. I didn’t stop at the other side this time and kept running, heading straight towards Razz. He saw me too late and his sockets widened in shock as I tackled him to the ground, pinning him there. 

“Our fights always seem to end the same way, huh?” I asked, breathing heavily as I held the skeleton down.  


“Heh” Razz chuckled, his sharp teeth pulling into a grin. “Seems like it. Fine, human, since you so clearly cannot handle my sheer maleficence, I shall spare you. Accept this great mercy while you have the option.”  


I snorted. “I accept your sparing, oh maleficent one. Thank you for humoring me in this fight.” I agreed, moving off of Razz and pulling him to his feet.  


“Good, now be gone, peasant. I shan’t see you in my domain any longer.”  


“Of course. I appease you, my lord.” I said, bowing dramatically and continuing on my way through the woods.  


I hummed to myself, taking a drink from my water bottle that the others had agreed I could have since it didn’t have any magical properties to it and was something that I needed. My thoughts on who might be next were answered when I came across Fell, standing in a slight clearing that the arrows all pointed towards. 

“Good morning, Great and Terrible Papyrus. I presume you are waiting for me so our confrontation may begin?” I questioned, putting my water bottle down at a nearby tree and looking towards the tall skeleton.  


“YOU WOULD BE CORRECT, HUMAN.” He said, nodding as a confrontation started. The corners of his mouth tugged upwards. “I HOPE YOU ARE PREPARED TO LOSE.”  


~ 

Fell’s fight was similar to Razz’s as he tried to exhaust me and refused my mercy each time I offered it to him. He seemed to enjoy the challenge I provided for him though, but he fell to my taunting too easily and got distracted each time, which ended up being his downfall. 

“AN INTERESTING BATTLE, HUMAN. I AM GLAD WE FINALLY GOT TO FIGHT, THOUGH I WILL NOT LOSE THE NEXT TIME, SO I HOPE YOU WILL BE PREPARED SHOULD WE FIGHT AGAIN.” I nodded and agreed, smiling as Fell accepted my mercy and let me continue onwards. There were still three more I had to fight and I had a feeling those three would be the hardest to beat.  


As I walked on I got the distinct feeling of being followed. I glanced backwards and saw the shadow of something slip behind a tree. I followed the arrows out to another clearing and stopped. 

“perceptive, aintcha?”  


“I try to be.” I replied, turning to face Red who stood behind me, hands in the pockets of his hoodie. His sharp teeth pulled into a grin, the golden one in his upper jaw glinting.  


“heh, too bad ya don’t got eyes on the back a yer head.” He said, grin widening as I turned my head. 

“i think yer winin streak’s over, kid.” Red told me as Syrup’s own sharp teeth pulled into a grin.  


“Two on one seems a little unfair, don’t you think?” I asked, slowly pulling my gaze away from the skeleton behind me to look at Red again, hyper aware of where both were now that I had to look out for two attackers instead of one.  


“don’t worry sweetness, we won’t go easy on you.” 

I jumped out of the way of a bone attack as a confrontation started between me and the two skeletons opposing me. I didn’t have much time to think about how strangely their songs melded together as powerful magic surrounded me and a large bone attack rushed towards me. 

I weaved in and out of the bones, having to move quickly. If I tripped up I knew more bones would steamroll me and that would be the end of the confrontation. And I wasn’t willing to lose so easily.  


A blue attack came in almost immediately after I had used my turn to select mercy. I froze and felt the attack pass through me, my SOUL almost dragging me to the ground as what I recognized as Syrup’s magic surrounded it and increased the gravity on it. 

I selected mercy again as the two skeletons grinned. I knew neither would take a loss lying down, which meant that I would have to work like hell to win. _Or play a little dirty._ I thought, grinning as blasters surrounded me.  


I stood in the middle of the blasters’ circle and waited. They charged quickly and fired at me, their raw power almost suffocating. 

I rolled out of the way at the very last second, bones bursting out of the ground where I had been and deflecting the blasters’ beams. 

“you could have killed her!” I heard Syrup yell at Red, neither seeing me as the dust from the powerful attack cleared. I smirked and made my way behind them as they focused on arguing with each other.  


“you got ta her in time, she’s fine.” Red argued back. “i thought she was better at dodgin than that.” I heard him grumble as both turned to face the bone structure. 

I neared the two as Syrup let it fall, both seeming taken aback when there was nothing inside.  


“I am better at dodging than that.” I spoke up, making both jump. They tried to turn to face me but I swept their legs out from under them. “Too bad you guys aren’t.” I said, grinning as Red groaned and Syrup sighed in relief.  


“that was a dirty trick, sweetness.”  


I shrugged, putting my hands out for both skeletons. “I think it’s only fair after you two tried tag teaming me.”  


Syrup chuckled, accepting my hand. “fair enough.” He agreed, ruffling my hair as Red pulled himself up off the ground.  


“heh, ya got us, kid. always thought it was some kinda fluke that ya got through yer underground, but guess i was wrong.” Red said, grinning at me as the confrontation came to an end.  


“Yep, I’m just too cool.” I agreed, nodding. “It was a total pain in my ass, but I had to prove Razz wrong.”  


Syrup smiled. “you are the coolest.”  


“I know.” I said, winking and waving goodbye to the two as I made my way towards the final battle.  


~ 

“I’m coming for you, Ink~” I called, looking around the forest as the arrows led me forward.  


“You are?” A voice returned my call, sounding confused. I looked around, trying to locate the source of it. 

“I mean, of course you are! Haha, yeah, alright. Human! You shall not get past this area, for I challenge you!” Ink called, still nowhere to be found as bones shot up from the ground and boxed me in.  


Looking upwards where I could still see the trees, I saw Ink hanging from a branch above my head. He looked back at me and grinned, swinging and jumping down into the box with me. Ink pulled the brush off of his back and spun it in his hands, getting a feeling for it before pointing it at me and beginning a confrontation. 

I waited for him to make the first move, my senses heightened in case he tried to pull something tricky.  


... 

“Ink?” I asked, confused as the artistic skeleton stood there, just watching me with a smile.  


“Yes?”  


“Are you going to attack? It is your turn.”  


“Oh, sure, if you really want me to, I guess.” Ink agreed, kicking into motion as he swung his paintbrush at me despite still being a few feet away. 

I noticed too late the black ink that had come from the brush and it covered me from head to toe. 

Ink’s eyes flashed as he regarded my spluttering form and his grin widened when I hit the mercy option, trying to wipe the stuff away from my face. Unfortunately, Ink used my temporary blindness to his advantage and I heard too late the sound of blasters charging all around me.  


“Oh shit.” I cursed, blindly trying to dodge as they released their magic. 

I was fully prepared for scorching beams to hit me, but instead I was drenched in a thick substance. I coughed and spat out what tasted distinctly like paint and took my time during my turn to wipe the stuff away from my eyes. 

When my vision was clear I sent a glare towards Ink who only grinned in response. I was completely covered in all the colors of the rainbow and then some and I had to keep wiping away the paint dripping dangerously close to my eyes. 

I thought for a moment, it was still my turn, and, well, if Ink wasn’t going to be serious about the battle, then why should I?  


I used my turn to run at the artist who disappeared in a puddle of ink in the floor. In fact, now that I looked, it seemed he had found the time to cover the entirety of our battle ground in ink. My shoes squelched as I came to a stop and looked around, wondering where the skeleton would pop up next. 

“Air attack!” Ink shouted, giving me enough warning to jump out of the way. 

Unfortunately, the ink covering the ground made me lose my footing and I slipped backwards into the stuff as Ink landed on his feet and twisted to lunge at me. I scrambled to get away but was too slow and the ground too slick to give me any purchase. Ink landed on top of me, knocking the air out of me as he laughed.  


I took it in stride and wrapped my arms around him, smudging the paint and ink all over him too. 

“Ah! No! Ew!” Ink squirmed in my grasp but I only tightened it, hugging the skeleton closer against my body and wrapping my legs around his torso.  


“Embrace the mess, Ink!” I shouted, rolling him to the side and covering both of us with ink and paint.  


“No! Haha, I don’t want it! This is so gross!”  


“This is your doing! Accept my mercy and I may just spare you!”  


“Never!” Ink refused, laughing as he squirmed in my grip. “I will not lose! I will be your undoing, human! You have terrorized us skeletons enough!”  


“I will not give up! Accept your defeat or be doomed to an inky demise!” I shouted back, having good enough purchase on the skeleton so he couldn’t slip from my grasp. The ink covering both of us certainly was helping aid him in a potential escape, but I refused to give up so easily.  


~ 

We play wrestled for a while longer, Ink occasionally slipping out of my grasp and teleporting away only for me to find him and catch him again. It was an incredibly messy activity, but both of us had a great time. 

“what the hell are you two doin? we’ve been waitin for the results fer like an hour now.” Red asked, the group of skeletons who I had fought earlier following and finding where Ink and I were more or less just messing around at this point.  


“Of course you wouldn’t be able to take a fight seriously.” Error grumbled, shaking his head as he saw the mess that had been made.  


“What are you talking about? I’m taking this very seriously.” To prove his point Ink summoned a paint splattered blaster that aimed at me. The blaster's magic built up and I shook my head at it as Ink looked to the group. It tilted its skull at me and I nodded towards Ink. It followed my gaze, it’s eye lights lighting up as it built up its magic and turned to face the distracted skeleton.  


Ink turned back to face me and probably watch his attack commence only to be faced by his own blaster as it released a wave of paint, covering any clean part of him in rainbow colors and catching some of the nearer skeletons off guard as it splattered them as well. 

I laughed as the blaster seemed to smile at its job well done and Ink blinked, his eye lights the only thing visible beneath the layers of paint as he looked between me and his blaster in confusion. “Did you just-” He began, pausing to wipe at his mouth and spit away a glob of paint. He looked back at me in confusion. “Did you just get my own blaster to betray me?”  


“Hehe, hell yeah I did.” I said, nodding as the other skeletons grumbled and complained about being caught in the crossfire and tried to wipe as much of the colorful paint off of themselves as possible.  


“I-” Ink looked at his blaster in what I could only classify as a mixture of amazement and shock. “I didn’t know you could do that.” He looked back to me and studied me for a moment before breaking out into a smile, wiping away some paint that had been threatening to drip down into his sockets. “Well, that was an exciting fight. And for getting my own blaster to betray me, I think you deserve the win. Congrats.”  


I smiled widely. “Thanks for fighting with me. I had a great time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, okay, firstly, the battles did last longer than I wrote them (I'm just trash at writing fighting) and I know Readz seems OP in this, but this was just a thing Ink set up for fun, more of a game than anything so no one was actually trying to kill each other. If that was the case then good luck fighting even one of those skells, nevermind ten of them.
> 
> Otherwise I hope you enjoyed! And if you celebrated, I hope you had a good Thanksgiving too!


	25. Short 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More shorts because I just have too many of these...

“Why do you guys play music?” I asked, everyone’s attention directing towards me.  


“why do you have a drummer in yer body?” Red asked me back. No one else seemed to get it.  


“Because it pumps my blood to the rest of my body. Now why do you have music? And why is it different depending on what you’re doing?” I said, narrowing my eyes towards him.  


“depen’s on if we’re fightin or not, that’s why it’s different at least.” Red answered, shrugging.  


“But why is it there in the first place?” I pushed.  


“magic”  


“That is not an acceptable answer and you know it.” I said, glaring at the sharp toothed skeleton.  


“what’s got ya so interested, hun?” Syrup asked me.  


“My insatiable need for knowledge is what’s got me interested.” I replied. “And the next person that tells me it’s only magic is getting slapped” I warned, done with the stupidly vague answer of ‘oh, it’s magic’. _Fuck that._  


“Actually, she’s got a point. Why do I play music?” Ink joined in the conversation, a hand over his rib cage. “No, how do I play music? I don’t even have a SOUL.” He said, his sockets narrowing in concentration and confusion.  


“We all do, idiot” Error answered, rolling his eye lights. “It’s a trait that carried over from the original glitches” He said, glaring at the Undertale brothers.  


“NYEH HEH, I, UM, DON’T THINK WE ARE GLITCHES” Papyrus spoke up, looking nervous. Everyone’s attention turned to the two brothers now curious as to the origins of their music. “AND I’M NOT TOO SURE WHY WE HAVE MUSIC, BUT I DON’T THINK IT’S VERY BAD!”  


Everyone looked to Sans who shrugged. “i dunno much more ‘bout it myself. far as i know, our magic produces music according to who we are, personality wise and stuff. and like red said, it depends on what we’re doin that changes the music. i have two types, idling and fighting.”  


There was silence as everyone absorbed this information. “so…” Honey spoke up, looking around with a glint in his sockets. “who’s got the best music?”  


“Obviously me, brah. Mine’s the most radical.” Fresh said, coming out of nowhere and leaning on the back of the couch. I started and scooted away from the parasitic skeleton towards Error. 

Error was glaring at the 90s nightmare, his magic crackling around him. He noticed me and didn’t say anything as Fresh mocked hurt. “Bro, what’re ya scared of your good ol’ fresh friend for? I haven’t done nuthin to ya.” Fresh said, looking at me with a hand on his ribcage. I narrowed my eyes and didn’t say anything, choosing to stay safe with Error instead. What a strange world I live in where I feel more comfortable with the destroyer than a parasite.  


“care ta show us then, parasite?” Red asked, breaking the tense silence as he too glared at Fresh.  


“Sure, dawg, you’ll have to fight me first though.” Fresh agreed, his grin widening.  


“heh, alright. i’ve been wantin an excuse ta skewer ya.” Red consented, his own grin sharp as Fresh moved from behind the couch and started the encounter.  


“Damnit, not in the house!” Razz yelled at the two, but it was too late, the encounter had already begun. 

Razz huffed and everyone backed away from the two. Ink came and sat down next to Error and me, grinning when Error glared at him, and the others all fell back to the walls for safety.  


Fresh was surrounded by blasters almost as soon as the confrontation started. Red’s left eye was blazing with magic. Fresh didn’t seem at all perturbed. The blasters fired powerful beams, disintegrating each other in the process. Fresh was nowhere to be seen. 

“I see you like startin off with heavy hitters, brah. That’s cool, that’s cool.” Fresh said, appearing behind Red. 

Red froze, sweat beading on his skull as the 90s skeleton put his hands on Red’s shoulders. “But I thought we were here to listen to music. Fightin like this is totally un-radical of you.” _Welp, Red’s dead. It wasn’t nice knowing you._  


No one moved or breathed as Red shakily replied, too quietly for anyone else to hear. Fresh smiled eerily and released Red, the faint hint of a funky song in the air before the encounter ended.  


“WELL THAT MOST CERTAINLY WASN’T TRAUMATIZING!” Papyrus said, chuckling nervously. “BUT, UM, IF THAT’S OVER, COULD WE ALL SHARE OUR MUSIC NOW?” He asked, perspiration on his skull as he looked at everyone.  


“Sure! I’ll go first!” Ink jumped on the idea, most of the tension leaving the room as he ran to the middle of the room. Fresh grinned and sat down near Error and me.  


“Are we just sharing our fighting music?” Ink asked after a moment of silence.  


“Yeah, sure” I answered, nodding.  


“Okay!” Ink promptly started an encounter with me that I didn’t consent to. I had a feeling I’d probably end up being the guinea pig for this.  


As was proved to me, I was the guinea pig for everyone’s encounters. We all started a rating system and kind of enjoyed listening to the differences in music that everyone provided. After I heard Sans’s and Papyrus’s, I could definitely figure out how everyone else’s was related.  


Sans’s was a lot more intense than anyone expected, but everyone was pretty quick to realize why that was. Papyrus’s was pretty upbeat and fun to listen to. Error’s, true to his namesake, was glitched and played differently each time we listened to it which many of us found odd. Ink’s was one of the most different and honestly the one I probably liked the best, despite all of them being good. Fresh’s, like I thought, was very funky. It was unnerving being in an encounter with him. Red’s, which I vaguely remember comparing to lots of bass and electric guitar was basically that. Fell’s was pretty similar. I had listened to both Syrup’s and Razz’s before, and those were fairly similar to the Underfell brothers. Blue’s was a very upbeat take on Sans’s music which I thought was cool. Honey’s was rather intense and… drill like?  


“WELL, HUMAN, WHOSE MUSIC WAS THE BEST?” Fell asked me, tapping his foot impatiently. Everyone’s attention was suddenly on me.  


“I liked all of them” I said neutrally.  


“LIAR” Fell accused. I shrugged. It’s not like it was a real lie, I did like all of them. I just omitted my favorite.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


I ran down the stairs, tripping on the last one and stumbling into the living room. 

_Bzzzzz._

My head shot upwards where the fly that had gotten in buzzed above me. I brandished my fly swatter at it to prove to it that I was the one in power. 

_Bzzz._

It mocked me, flying around in dumb circles far out of my reach. I waited, like a cat stalking its prey. My eyes followed its abstract and lazy pattern as it flew around the living room. 

I flipped the swatter around in my hand impatiently and watched as it flew to the windows, bumping steadily into them. I stalked quietly towards it as it landed against the window, unrealizing of the danger it had put itself in. Its wings fluttered, as if it did know what danger it was in and was laughing in the face of it.  


I stepped quietly on the couch and put my other foot against the back of it, readying the swatter in my hand. With a quick, deft motion, I slammed the swatter against the window, killing the fly. I let it fall to the ground below, where it would serve as an omen to other insects that dared enter my abode.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


“hmm” Syrup hummed as he studied the menu, taking forever in deciding what he wanted to order. Razz groaned and I was lying over the table boredly.  


“Syrup, c’mon, it doesn’t take five hours to choose a meal” I groaned, tearing little bits off my napkin. We had already sent the waitress away twice.  


“i need to make sure i get something i’ll like” He replied, ruffling my hair and turning the page of the menu.  


“This is why I don’t go out to eat with you” Razz grumbled, picking at his bandanna.  


“God, I wish they would stop letting those things into public places. They’re disgusting” Someone spoke up from a booth across from us. I spared them a glance and saw them glaring at out table. I noticed Razz and Syrup were a bit more tense at this. “And that girl is willingly sitting with them. She’s one of the worst kinds of people.” I grinned at them and waggled my brows. They scoffed. The waitress came by again, blocking our view from the rude patron who would do better to just keep their big mouth shut.  


“Are you ready to order?”  


“Yes, ohmygod, please” I said, sitting up and giving the waitress my order. Razz gave his own order and we all looked at Syrup. He sweated under the pressure and finally blurted out his order and handed the waitress his menu. 

“Jesus, Syrup, was it really that hard?” I asked exasperatedly, turning to face the skeleton.  


“yes” He answered, nodding and smirking.  


“There they go again, acting all lovey dovey and shit. Keep it to yourselves! No one wants to see that here!” The patron, quite boldly, yelled directly at us. They were glaring again and I had half a mind to go over there and shove their fork down their throat.  


“Why, you jelly?” I retorted, grinning at them as I entwined my fingers with Syrup’s. Razz groaned and Syrup’s face turned a dark orange.  


“You’re disgusting. Why do you socialize with those things?” The patron scoffed again, looking at me disgustedly.  


“Cause they’re my sluts” I said back, waggling my brows and smirking wider at the patron’s shocked look. Syrup’s face went entirely orange and Razz slammed his head on the table.  


The patron was silenced and they returned to their own meal, leaving quite shortly after and avoiding looking at or nearing our table like it was the plague. I laughed as we got our own food and dug in happily. Syrup’s face was a vivid orange the entire night.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


“I don’t want to fight! Please! Just let me go!”  


“YOU WILL NOT PROCEED PAST THIS AREA, HUMAN. NOW STOP COWERING IN FEAR AND FIGHT!”  


“I won’t!”  


“THEN PREPARE TO DIE.”  


Bones came from all directions. It was oddly reminiscent of a bullet hell. Powerful lasers charged and fired one after another. That felt more like a firing squad. There was hardly enough time to roll out of the way before coming to a skidding halt when a volley of blue attacks came in a wall formation, nowhere to dodge. The magic turned the SOUL blue and gravity was felt tenfold. It was almost impossible to jump over the regular attacks now. It was becoming just barely manageable.  


“I WILL KILL YOU, HUMAN. AND WHEN I DO EVERYONE WILL PRAISE ME. I WILL BE KNOWN AS THE ONE WHO SET MONSTERS FREE. I WILL LEAD US TO THE SURFACE. I WILL DESTROY EVERY LAST BIT OF HUMANITY.”  


“Humanity is terrifying! How do you think you’ll be able to destroy the human race when they so greatly outnumber you? There are weapons, ones so much more powerful than you could ever imagine! Why do you need to destroy it?!”  


“YOUR KIND ARE THE ONES WHO LOCKED US UNDER THIS MOUNTAIN. THEY WILL NOT ESCAPE PUNISHMENT FOR THEIR SINS.”  


“Would you get out of your oversized skull for two seconds and listen to me?! You don’t stand a chance! If every monster SOUL equals only one human SOUL, what are you going to do against billions?! You’ll be wiped out the moment you step out of this mountain looking for a fight!”  


“EVEN SO I REFUSE TO STAY TRAPPED UNDER HERE ANY LONGER.”  


Bones sharpened to deadly, jagged points flew towards the human SOUL. Running only put them into more danger as demonic skulls surrounded the area and charged. There was no easy way out and the only option was to run around with the beams. It was exhausting and HP dropped by four points.  


“This isn’t getting us anywhere! The longer we keep fighting the longer you’ll be stuck under here! What part of 'I want to help' don’t you understand?!”  


“IF YOU DON’T WANT THIS FIGHT TO BE PROLONGED THEN LET ME KILL YOU. I WILL MAKE IT AS PAINLESS AS POSSIBLE, WHICH IS A GREAT MERCY.”  


“Death is mercy, huh?”  


“PAINLESS DEATH IS MERCIFUL. THERE HAVE BEEN MORE INSTANCES THAN I CARE TO COUNT OF DEATHS BEING PROLONGED AND INCREDIBLY PAINFUL. I WOULD ACCEPT WHILE YOU HAVE THE CHANCE, FOR IF YOU FACE OFF AGAINST THE OTHERS, THEY WILL NOT SHOW YOU THE SAME MERCY.”  


“I’m not going to die”  


“THEN I WILL NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO FACE.”  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


“Razz! Summon a blaster for me, I miss them.” I said, looking towards the shorter skeleton.  


“No” He denied.  


“But the children, Razz. Think of the children.”  


“They are not children. They are hardly even sentient.”  


“But Razzzzz” I whined. A blaster popped into existence right in front of me, it's magic charging and jaw open towards me.  


“Blaster! I missed you!” I exclaimed, jumping up and grabbing the floating skull into a hug. It's magic discharged and it looked at me, confused as I released it, allowing it to hover in the air in front of me. “It's been a while, hasn't it? I think the last time I saw you was when Razz and I last fought.”  


I didn't pay much mind to Razz’s dumbfounded expression as I conversed with the little blaster, reminiscing in old memories.  


The blaster chirped happily at me since it couldn't speak English. “I know! How long have those two been able to summon you guys and they never knew you were sentient? Honestly.” I agreed, shaking my head with a smile, continuing on with our conversation while Razz and now Syrup watched on in shock.  


The blaster nuzzled into me, making me laugh in surprise. “Aw, you’re so cute. I’m officially taking you over from Razz, I hope you don’t mind.” The blaster nodded, chirping happily.  


“Hey, wait a second-”  


“Can I call you Cinnamon Bun? Like the ones from the Underground? I think it fits you cause you’re so sweet” The blaster nodded again, wriggling free from my arms and floating around me excitedly.  


“But that’s my blaster” Razz said, seeming lost as he stared at the floating skull.  


“Cinnamon Bun” I corrected him. “And I’m sorry to say, but you’ve officially been liberated one blaster. They’re mine now” I said happily, nodding in finality as Cinnamon Bun chirped in agreement.  


“Wait, no! You can’t just take my blaster from me!” Razz said, finally seeming to understand what was happening and glaring at me.  


“Their name is Cinnamon Bun, Razz.” I corrected him again, Cinnamon Bun nodding in agreement. “Or Cinnamon for short”  


“Fine, Jesus, Cinnamon is my blaster. You can’t just take them from me.” Razz argued, crossing his arms. Cinnamon trilled quietly and nudged my shoulder, looking up at me sadly. I looked pointedly back at Razz.  


“you do still have more” Syrup said quietly, looking between the sad little blaster and his brother.  


“Oh my God! Fine! Keep the fucking blaster!” Razz shouted, throwing his arms into the air as he lost the battle. I grinned and Cinnamon Bun chirped happily, flying over to Razz and nuzzling his cheek in thanks. Razz’s face turned a light purple and he huffed, turning away from the happy blaster and leaving the kitchen.  


“i really didn’t know that the blasters were sentient” Syrup said when his brother had left, looking curiously at Cinnamon as they explored the kitchen.  


“I’m surprised, I thought it was kind of obvious they were sentient, or at least had sentient qualities. I mean, they look sentient and whenever I fight Razz they kind of seem to have a mind of their own, even if you guys direct them.” I said, shrugging and watching as the curious blaster nudged at a pot in the sink. They left it soon after to go explore more interesting things.  


“well, we never really did summon them for anything more than fighting.” Syrup said, shrugging too. “that does make me curious though, i wonder if our alternates’ blasters are sentient as well or not.”  


“You can always ask” I suggested.  


“maybe” Syrup agreed, nodding. “i think i might try toying with my own first”  


“‘Toy’?” I asked, looking at him skeptically. If he was going to be mean to them then so help me…  


Syrup noticed my distrust. “just see what they can do. what kind of intelligence they have. if each is different. more so mental capabilities than anything. you can watch to make sure i don’t hurt them” He offered.  


“Alright, you can go in the backyard though. I don’t want the house getting destroyed if something goes wrong.”  


“you don’t trust me?” Syrup asked, mocking hurt as he put a hand over where his heart would be and sniffled. I stared at him with a deadpan expression. “alright, alright, i’ll go out back. there’s more space anyways.” He agreed, grinning as he led the way out to the backyard, Cinnamon and I trailing behind.  


“What are you doing now? Setting that thing free?” Razz asked, coming out the back door and standing near me on the back porch. Cinnamon was exploring the new surroundings in interest.  


“No, Syrup wanted to test his own” I said, ignoring Razz’s huff as Syrup summoned one of his own blasters into existence. _Where do they come from?_ Syrup must have said something because it’s jaw closed, magic dissipating as it looked to the tall skeleton in stoic concentration, like it was awaiting his next orders.  


“I guess they are… sentient” Razz muttered, leaning against the porch railing with his chin propped in a gloved hand. Cinnamon heard him and chirped in agreement, Razz starting and flushing lightly again.  


After a while, Syrup un-summoned the blaster and we went back inside. 

“How’d it go?” I asked, Cinnamon flying ahead of us and zooming away to explore the rest of the house.  


“the blasters definitely are sentient and seem to have a pretty high level of intelligence. the one i summoned seemed a lot more ready to fight, it was very… stoic, i guess.” Syrup said, trying to think of a better word to describe his experience with the blaster until he shrugged and gave up.  


“Well, at least you two had fun getting all buddy buddy with the blasters, but it’s dinnertime and I’m not feeding that thing” Razz said, grumpy again.  


“do they even eat?” Syrup posed a good question.  


“Cinnamon, do you eat at all?” I shouted so the blaster could hear me from wherever it was upstairs. It trilled in the negative and continued its exploration. “No, they don’t”  


“you can understand it?” Syrup asked, Razz seeming interested as well as he listened.  


“More or less” I said, shrugging. “So what’s for dinner?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, I've been kind of been throwing around ideas for a different story of mine and haven't thought much about this one. I have been writing some stuff but I get halfway and jump to a different topic. Sometimes I wish my mind was easier to keep on one subject, but alas, this is how I work (which probably explains why my chapters are so inconsistent).
> 
> So, if I were to do something with Christmas/Gyftmas, is there anything in particular anyone would like to see? It probably won't be as long as the Halloween chapters, but I'm still up in the air about what I want to do so I guess we'll see what happens.


	26. Christmas Special

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just what the title says.

_It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas._  


“I thought you nerds didn’t celebrate Gyftmas.” Alphys, who had been looking into shop windows displaying all kinds of Christmas decorations, turned to look at me questioningly.  


“I th-think th-those are for C-Christmas.” Undyne spoke up, teeth chattering in the cold air. Alphys didn’t seem too affected by it but after waking around the town for half an hour and not actually going into any of the stores, I was beginning to feel the chill as well.  


I nodded when Alphys turned her gaze to me to confirm or deny the statement. “Yeah, Christmas and some other holidays. They’re all pretty similar in their general idea and are usually about being merry and spending time with family and loved ones.” I added, making my way towards the door. I decided it would be better to get out of the cold for a while. That and I could get started on my Christmas shopping early and maybe even educate Alphys and Undyne on the holiday season a little more as well.  


The little bell above the door chimed pleasantly and the heated air of the store helped knock off the chill from outside when I entered. Undyne seemed thankful for the fact as she and Alphys followed after me. 

I took in the store, lights decorating a lot of the area and casting a cheerful glow on the displays holding all types of decorations and things for purchase. There was a fake tree in the corner of the window as well, decorated in all kinds of ornaments and lit up brightly which was what, along with the other lights and wrapped presents in the window, had first attracted Alphys’s attention to the store.  


“Hello and Happy Holidays!” A peppy looking clerk greeted from behind the counter. They were smiling widely and were wearing what seemed to be an elf costume with a hat to match. 

Before I could begin to feel too bad for them, they continued. “Can I help you three to find anything today?”  


“We’re just looking, thank you.” I replied, shaking my head in the negative.  


“Alright! Just let me know if you need anything!” They agreed easily, nodding in understanding. I returned the nod and continued further into the store, hoping to get the clerk’s eyes off my back.  


*Snrk*  


“Alphys they’re doing their job, you don’t need to be rude.” I reprimanded, frowning as I moved towards the section of the store that had items that looked like they would work well as gifts.  


Alphys snorted. “They look ridiculous.” She said, a little too loudly for my comfort. Before I could argue that she was being rude again, she broke out cackling. I sighed and glanced at Undyne, looking for some help from her to handle her wife, but found her to be in a similar state of trying to hold back her own laughter behind her hand.  


“Why do I come out shopping with you two?” I grumbled, turning back to the shelves lined with various items ranging from fuzzy socks to Christmas ornaments and baubles.  


“Heh, y-you wouldn’t want to g-go out shopping with Sans and P-Papyrus, would you?” Undyne asked, tone sly. Both her and Alphys knew exactly why I refused to go shopping anywhere other than to the grocery store with Razz and Syrup.  


“Of course she wouldn’t! Sans takes FOREVER deciding on anything! He even skipped training last week because he couldn’t decide what outfit he wanted to get!” Alphys yelled, gesturing wildly in the air. 

Undyne snickered, obviously enjoying her wife’s reaction as she nodded to spur her on. 

“And DON’T get me started on Papyrus! I had to take him out ONCE on the Queen’s orders and he disappeared the minute I wasn’t looking! I had to search for him for an HOUR because I didn’t want the Queen to kick my ass and I found him SLEEPING in a rack of clothes! We didn’t even end up buying anything! It was a waste of my time!”  


Alphys continued on her rant, talking about how she ended up kicking Razz’s ass the next time they had training together and about how she threw Syrup into the snow outside of the store once she found him only for him to disappear again. I kind of tuned her out (Undyne seemed to be having a great time listening to her wife’s misadventures as she stifled laughter and encouraged her with nods of understanding) and I looked through the items on the shelves. 

I offhandedly felt one of the fuzzy socks, noting that it was soft and wondering for a moment if anyone I knew would like something like that. Maybe Syrup would. The thought clicked gears together in my head and I realized the best gift to get for Syrup would probably be something soft. _He’s always holding onto me with the excuse that I’m soft, maybe I can work with that._ I nodded to myself, putting the idea to the back of my mind to think about later.  


_This ornament might be a nice present for my parents._ I thought, turning a little carved angel figurine over in my hands. Its inscription said “Guardian”. It had little wire wings on its back and the figure was carved from wood with few details that made it simple in a beautiful way. 

I hummed and picked up a similar one, this one with the inscription of “Mother” and with the angel like figure holding a bundled child in its arms. I smiled at it and put the guardian one down, picking up a different one that had the inscription of “Father” on it. This figure was holding a child’s hand and seemed to be looking down at them. I hummed and looked through the rest of the ornaments.  


“Pfft, think Sans would l-like this, babe?” Undyne cackled, hers and Alphys’s one sided conversation apparently over and done with as the fish woman held up a pair of fluffy pink gloves that looked like they were better suited towards a young girl still in her princess phase.  


Alphys looked over from browsing cards and snorted. “He had better if you’re planning on getting them for him. If he tries to throw them out I’ll kick his ass.” Alphys said, cracking her knuckles with a malevolent grin on her face. “Of course, I’ll kick his ass anyways, but all the more reason.”  


I rolled my eyes at the two’s antics and continued my own search for presents that weren’t just gag gifts. 

_Maybe Honey and Sans would like some kind of gag gift. Man, I have too many people to shop for._ I thought, letting out a huff as I thought about everyone I felt obligated to get gifts for. _Obviously Razz (what would Razz like? maybe a book? a new bandana? I’ll have to think about that one…), Syrup (definitely something soft), Alphys (anime?), Undyne (she already has everything she needs in relation to her work, so maybe something more for comfort? something warm maybe, since she gets cold easily...), Temmie (I feel like Tem would be happy with anything. maybe a new sweater, hers is getting kind of old… maybe I can talk to Nap about it), Nap (music, potentially. what does a celebrity need? I’ll think on that one), Toriel (maybe she’d like some kind of cook book?) and Asgore (more tea? flowers for his garden maybe…)._  


And then of course I still had my own family to get gifts for, but that seemed simple enough (the ornaments were pretty nice and I think the mother and father ones would be nice presents for each of my parents), but that still left Undertale, Underfell, Underswap, and Error and Ink to get stuff for. _Ugh._ I groaned and picked my way towards the wrapping paper and bows, nothing else in the store really catching my eye as being suitable gift material for anyone I knew.  


I was determined though. I would find great gifts for everyone.  


“Oh shit” A crash echoed in the store and Alphys stood guiltily over a toppled card tower, the holiday cards scattered all over the floor.  


So long as I can survive this trip.

\-- 

_Walking in a winter wonderland._  


Big, fat flakes of snow drifted lazily past the windows to the ground below like they had been since the previous night. Snow was collecting everywhere, covering all it fell down on in a white layer of fluffy, frozen powder that cancelled schools for the day. 

I watched out the window with a mug of cocoa in my hands and a blanket wrapped around me as a few of the neighborhood kids, humans and monsters alike, ran around outside, enjoying their hard earned snow day.  


I sipped at my cocoa, chuckling when one kid threw a snowball at their unsuspecting friend. Their friend whipped around and yelled at them before throwing a snowball back. The first kid dodged and the activity seemed to have drawn the other children into gathering their own snowballs and chucking them at each other.  


Before too long a snowball fight was happening on the street with kids running around, forming alliances, and destroying each other with their icy projectiles. Some of the dramatics the kids put on were incredibly entertaining, one kid going as far as to pretend to die in the most dramatic way possible when he was hit by a snowball. Some other kids mourned over his corpse before they had to scatter from enemy fire since two teams had apparently been formed and were now engaging in a full fledged war.  


All at once the war stopped short and the children all looked over towards our house in varying forms of confusion and disappointment. I was confused and followed their gazes to see Razz probably yelling at them to go home. _What a spoil sport._ I rolled my eyes and downed the rest of my cocoa, shedding my blanket and putting the mug down on the table. I moved over to the door and put my coat on before sliding my boots on and finding my gloves. I opened the door, a gust of the frosty air stinging my eyes and a flurry of snowflakes finding their way inside. They melted quickly on the rug and I stepped outside, tugging the door closed behind me.  


“HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU ALL THAT I DO NOT WANT TO HEAR YOUR ANNOYING PLAYING? THERE ARE PLENTY OF OTHER PLACES FOR YOU TO PROCEED WITH YOUR… SHENANIGANS THAT IS NOT AT THE FRONT OF MY HOUSE!” Razz yelled at the kids, stomping a foot indignantly. I snorted, _been a while since I’ve seen him do that_ , and stooped down to scoop up some snow. The powdery snow formed easily into a ball that, while not perfect, would do the trick. I patted the snowy ball and weighted it in my hands, deciding the best angle to hit Razz with it. Or at least try to.  


I felt a few eyes on me and I glanced to see some of the kids watching me with interest, clearly bored with Razz’s nagging. I looked back towards Razz, the back of his skull almost blending in with the white background. It seemed like as good a target as any.  


My snowball exploded on Razz’s back, my aim was a little low, but it got his attention alright. Razz whipped around to face me, left eye burning with magic and a bone already half formed in his hand. One kid snickered as Razz’s expression changed slowly from anger to confusion before going straight back to anger. I scooped up another handful of snow and patted it carefully into a ball. I smiled at the furious skeleton in front of me “No need to be a spoil sport, Sans.” and chucked the snowball at his head.  


I, of course, had no chance of hitting Razz a second time, especially one he was aware of what I was doing, and the snowball hit the ground with a pitiful plop, becoming one with the rest of the snow once again. What neither of us were expecting, however, was the volley of snowballs sent both our ways as the kids snuck closer and gathered plenty of ammunition to use against us. 

_Those traitorous bastards!_ I could only watch my demise unfold before me as snowballs rained down from above. And then I heard a blaster charge and fire, melting away half of the snowballs.  


“Mwah.. Mwah HAH HAH! YOU CHILDREN DARE TO CHALLENGE I, THE GREAT AND MALEVOLENT SANS? YOU HAVE JUST SEALED YOUR DOOMS! I WILL TRY TO MAKE YOUR DEFEATS QUICK AND PAINLESS!” Razz declared, one foot on a lump of snow as he posed with a finger pointed towards the sky, his bandana billowing in the wind. His blaster was floating just behind him as he looked back down at the children, a wide grin stretching over his sharp teeth at their nervous expressions.  


“Pfft” One kid, a mouse looking monster with big ears and an even larger scarf covering the lower part of their face snorted. “You can try it, grandpa. But you’re gonna be the one eating snow by the end of this.”  


Razz, surprisingly, didn’t seem too offended by the dig and he smirked at the monster as the other kids broke out of their funk and started running back to their defenses to prepare for war. “We shall see. And if I win, you will all play somewhere else.”  


“Pft, okay, like that’ll happen, old man. But if we win, we get to stay here and you have to make us all hot chocolate.” The mouse agreed, eyes mischievous and making them seem like they were smirking even though their mouth wasn’t visible.  


“Deal”  


I ended up getting dragged into the snowball fight on Razz’s team despite my not wanting to push the kids somewhere else, but Razz insisted that it was my duty to defend my territory and that it was my fault in the first place for allowing them to stick around for so long in the first place. _“We wouldn’t be in a battle for our lives if it wasn’t for you, this is the least you can do!”_ Of course, Razz was just being dramatic as always and he actually seemed to be enjoying the little battle against the neighborhood kids despite his claims.  


I threw a snowball over the barricade Razz had formed very quickly (impressively quickly, if I’m honest) and ducked back behind it, going back to making more for Razz to throw. 

Razz had taken the job of firing snowballs at the offending team for himself and had designated me, kindly, as the ammunitions maker and the “human meat shield” if anyone got too close. Luckily we hadn’t gotten rushed yet, but the slow dying out of noise from the other team left me worried. _It’s only a matter of time._  


“CHAAAARGE!” The battle cry echoed across the battlefield and even more rose to meet it in a cacophony of noise. Snowballs flew overhead and I ducked further behind the barricade, fearing for my life. I looked over at Razz with wide eyes and saw him kneeling against the barricade, a frown playing over his teeth. He seemed to be in thought. _Now is not the time to be thinking! We’re about to get slaughtered!_ I shifted to a kneeling position as well with one knee on the ground and my other foot in front of me, ready to push off and run if I needed to. 

The snowballs started hitting closer to where we were. One exploded on the ground next to me and crunching snow met my ears as the kids got closer, shouts for blood getting louder.  


“GET THEM!”  


“ATTACK!”  


“STOP HIDING LIKE COWARDS AND FACE US!”  


“WE’LL MAKE YOUR DEFEATS PAINLESS!”  


“Hey, don’t give out on me now. This is our chance. We can finally get them face to face and since they’re close enough and don’t have any barricades and we do, they’re no match.” Razz told me, grinning as he picked up two snowballs and handed one to me. I took it in a slight daze, thinking that Razz must be insane if he thinks we can take on fifteen kids all on our own. 

Razz chuckled and picked up another snowball, kneeling against the barricade again and peeking over it. He raised his arm and chucked one of his snowballs. There was a shout and at least five snowballs hit our barricade where Razz had just been.  


_God, he really is insane._ I realized as Razz picked up another snowball and threw it around the corner. It was followed by another upset shout and more snowballs exploded on the ground where Razz had been. 

I sighed. There was no getting out of this now, may as well try and survive I guess.  


I threw my snowball over the top of the barricade, not trusting my reflexes enough to poke my head over to see where anyone was, but trying to rely on my sense of hearing. _Maybe if I can just pinpoint where a few of them are…_

I was gathering another snowball when a twig snapping caught my attention. I turned to face my demise as a snowball sailed right at my forehead and exploded on contact, leaving the icy shards to melt and run down my face.  


In the end we really were no match for fifteen kids and their skills in snowball wars. Razz got taken out soon after I did by multiple kids who had been a lot closer to our barricade than he realized and all the kids were more than happy to take the win and the free hot chocolate. 

All in all, it was a fun day. 

All except when Razz got me back for hitting him with a snowball by having one of his blasters drop a mouthful of snow on me. I didn’t particularly enjoy snow melting down my back and Syrup was a little confused about why I kept glaring at Razz when he got home, but he didn’t complain too much about the sudden lack of hot chocolate in the house.

\-- 

_There’s no place like home for the holidays._  


“Merry Christmas!”  


“happy gyftmas, honey.”  


“Happy Gyftmas to you as well, trash mammal.”  


Both Razz and Syrup had been in pretty good moods for the past week, the spirit of the holidays seeming to infect everyone and make everything just a bit more pleasant. Even reports of monster hate crimes had gone down, not too significantly, but enough to add to the cheer of the holidays. 

I smiled at the brothers and they returned it.  


“Do you still plan on going over to your parents’ today?” Razz asked. He was leaning against the kitchen counter, a cup of tea off to his side as he studied me.  


I nodded. “Yeah, I’ll be back before noon time though and I still have to give out all my gifts as well, but after that we can spend the rest of the day together, if ya want.”  


Razz nodded, a small smile forming over his teeth. “Sure, that sounds good. After all, I do make the best Gyftmas dinner and I know you would be severely disappointed if you had to miss it.”  


“I don’t know how I survived missing it for the past 20 years of my life. I’ll be sure to savor this one.” I agreed, a smile of my own forming.  


“yep, sans’s cookin’s the best.” Syrup agreed, smiling lazily at his brother. Razz merely brushed away the praise, though he didn’t try very hard to mask the his proud smile.  


“Heh, okay, I’m going to get my stuff and head out. Don’t open presents without me.” I told the two, earning two ‘alright’s before I headed up the stairs to my room. 

After getting my parents’ presents and putting on a coat and shoes, I went back downstairs and said my goodbyes to the brothers before leaving.  


“Hey mom, Merry Christmas”  


I was enveloped in a warm hug. I laughed and returned it, entering my parents’ house soon after.  


“Merry Christmas, dad.”  


I presented the two with my gifts and they gave me my own. They loved the ornaments and I got a nice new scarf and knit hat. We ate breakfast together and talked about old Christmases together. It was nice and all too soon I was sent home to “go be with my friends. After all, your father and I still have to go see the rest of the family. We love you. Merry Christmas, dear.”  


I hugged my parents goodbye and wished them happy holidays. My mother stopped me before I could leave and she hurried back into the house. My father shrugged when I looked at him in confusion. 

My mother was quick to return to the door with two small gift bags that she handed to me, telling me they were for Razz and Syrup as a thank you for taking care of her daughter so well. 

I laughed in surprise and agreed that I would deliver them to the brothers. 

My mother and father sent me away with another round of happy holidays.  


I pulled open the front door and stepped inside, shivering from the temperature change. The smell of turkey cooking hit me as I closed the door behind me and toed my snow covered shoes off at the door. 

“That smells good, you’re not cooking it too early though, are you?” I commented, moving over to the Christmas/Gyftmas tree and putting the two gift bags under it with the others. The tree was a little too tall for our living room and was bent over at the top (the star was just barely hanging on) because Razz and I both wanted a tall tree and since we didn’t really measure out how much space we had, it resulted in this. I still thought it looked nice (it kind of reminded me of the Grinch’s Christmas tree) and it had been really fun decorating it with both Syrup and Razz.  


“Of course I’m not, I know what I’m doing.” Razz called back from the kitchen.  


“Alright” I was a little skeptical, but Razz usually knew what he was doing so I didn’t argue.  


I made my way to the kitchen where the smell of the cooking turkey was even stronger. I saw Cinnamon floating by the stove, watching the turkey cooking longingly. _But they don’t even eat._ I shook my head as Razz shooed the blaster away from the oven, earning a trill of disappointment. 

“have a good time at your parents, sweetness?” Syrup was lounging at the kitchen table, his head resting on one hand and his sockets almost closing as he smiled at me.  


I nodded. “Yeah, mom got you two something so I put those under the tree too.”  


“She hardly even knows us.” Razz said, looking at me in a mixture of surprise and confusion.  


I shrugged, a smile tugging at my lips. “She can be like that sometimes. She said it was thanks for taking such good care of me.” A small flush climbed up Razz’s cheekbones and he nodded, turning back to his cooking quickly. 

Cinnamon was shooed away again as I sat at the table, making small talk with the brothers.  


“So, should we give presents to everyone else first? Or open ours?”  


“No way are our doppelgangers getting their presents before us.” Razz decided that we would open our presents that we had gotten each other first before giving everyone else theirs. No one opposed this and after Razz was done making whatever else he had been, we went out to the living room. Cinnamon trailed behind us and Razz speed walked ahead of Syrup and I. Apparently he really wanted to be the present distributor.  


Syrup chuckled when Razz practically shoved a neatly wrapped box into his hands and I received a similar box in the same manner. Razz didn’t look at us as we sat down on the floor and unwrapped our gifts from him. It seemed like he might have been embarrassed. 

I balled up the red wrapping paper and set it on the ground, Cinnamon being quick to steal it and start throwing it around and chasing after it. I lifted the cover off the box and found a bone inside with a red ribbon wrapped around it. I couldn’t help myself and snorted. I really hoped Razz had gotten the same gift for Alphys too. _Aw man, I should’ve asked Razz for a bone for Alphys too, that would’ve been great._  


“It’s under the bone” Razz mumbled, still refusing to look at either Syrup or me. A steady flush was rising on his cheekbones that I thought was rather adorable. _I love when he gets like this._ I chuckled and saw Razz’s flush get deeper. 

I lifted the bone (I’m always surprised by how smooth and perfect they are and it makes me wonder how the ribbon stays in place. Magic probably) and saw a neatly folded purple square. I took it out of the box and unfolded it. _Oh, it’s a bandana. It’s really soft too._ I ran my thumb over the fabric, wondering what it was made of since it clearly wasn’t normal bandana fabric.  


“thanks, bro, i love it.” Syrup’s thank you brought me out of my thoughts and I looked over to see him fastening a new collar around his neck, his old one already on the ground. It looked pretty nice, being made of some kind of deep black base material with small silver spikes studding it. Razz muttered something and I thanked him as well, tying the bandana around my head. I put the bone back in the box for safe keeping and put it to the side.  


“this is for you, bro. and this one’s for you, sweetness.” A different gift, this one in a gift bag instead, floated into my lap. Cinnamon trilled curiously, abandoning the paper wrapping ball and floating over to Razz to nose into his present. Razz tried (not very hard) to shoo them away before giving up entirely and digging into the tissue paper with his blaster watching curiously over his shoulder. 

I pulled the tissue paper out of my own present and found a skeleton plush that made me squint suspiciously at Syrup. The tall skeleton merely shrugged with a smile and Razz chucked his tissue paper at him for giving him a joke book.  


It was my turn next and I scooted over to the tree, Razz moving to the side, so I could access the three presents I had wrapped and put under there. I pulled them out and debated on whether or not to give the brothers my presents first or my parents’. _Eh, I guess it doesn’t matter._ I shrugged mentally and slid two of the presents to the brothers and gave the third to Cinnamon who was still trying to nose in on Razz’s own gifts. 

The little blaster tilted their skull at me questioningly when I gave them their gift and I assured them that it was for them. Cinnamon chirped excitedly and tore into the paper, making me glad it was only a toy and not something more valuable.  


“i feel like you’re tryna tell me somethin here.” Syrup said, his tone amused. I looked over to him after watching Cinnamon figure out they had just received a toy and start playing with it immediately. I had a feeling I’d be having to pick up a few more for the little blaster.  


The corner of my mouth quirked upwards as I looked pointedly at the skeleton sitting across from me. He was holding a large, chunky knit blanket that I had found when I was out shopping on my own one time and had immediately fallen in love with. It was just so comfortable and soft and the absolute perfect gift for Syrup. 

“nyeh heh, well, i love it, honey. thank you.” Syrup chuckled, folding down the blanket in his lap. I nodded with a smile.  


“And thank you for my gift as well. It is… suitable.” Razz spoke up, avoiding my eyes when I turned to him. 

He was holding onto the box that had a pair of new combat boots in it. I knew he’s been needing new boots for a while now, but he’s refused to go out and look for any so I took it upon myself to find some. I was a little worried that they wouldn’t fit right, as is the problem with getting clothes for anyone, but I still had the receipt if he wanted to exchange them at all.  


I nodded. “No problem, you’ve needed new boots for a while now. And if they don’t fit right I still have the receipt so you can exchange them or just get the money back.” I told him. 

Razz nodded, still avoiding my eyes, and I decided it was time for the final presents so we could get going on giving presents to everyone else. 

I picked up the two gift bags my mother had given me and handed them to their respective recipients. “These ones are from my parents, hopefully it’s nothing embarrassing.” I added, earning an amused huff from Syrup.  


The presents my mother had given me to give to the brothers ended up being scented candles. Syrup’s was pine and Razz’s was cinnamon, which I thought was suiting enough. 

I complained good naturedly that I should have been the one receiving scented candles since skeletons don’t even have noses to enjoy them. Syrup joked that his nose had been stolen when he was just a baby bones so he had never been able to enjoy scented candles which were oh so popular back in the Underground. Razz got annoyed with him and told both of us that if we didn’t stop messing around we were going to waste the whole day away.  


Eventually we decided to get a move on and I went upstairs to get my presents for everyone. I already had them all in a big bag (unfortunately it was just a cloth one, I didn’t have a big red one to look like Santa) but I did have a Santa hat! I put my hat on and slung the bag over my shoulder and headed back downstairs to wait for Razz and Syrup.  


“Hey, Alphys! Undyne! Merry Christmas!”  


The two were happy to receive their presents and Undyne returned with her own presents for all of us. Alphys noogied Razz and claimed that it was his present in return for all those bones he was always giving her (and he had done it again this year, I’m so proud of him). I got spear cleaner and scale moisturizer and Alphys and Undyne seemed happy with their respective gifts. 

We said goodbye to them and continued on.  


“Tori! Merry Christmas!”  


Toriel greeted me back, wishing us happy holidays as well and eveloping me in a strong hug. Razz was a little awkward about giving presents to the queen “She’s royalty! She doesn’t care what we get her!” but Toriel was more than happy with the cookbook I got for her and she happily sent us off with large portions of cinnamon butterscotch pie that I was more than happy to receive.  


“Merry Christmas, Asgore!”  


Asgore sweeped me into a hug as well, seeming a bit possessive almost like he knew we had visited his ex before him (it was probably the pie that gave us away). He still happily returned the greetings and was amazed that anyone had gotten him anything at all. I assured him that he meant a lot to me, of course I would get him something, and he tearily thanked me for the box of tea and apologized for not getting me very much in return. I thought that was a little ridiculous since he gave me a hand knit scarf that I had to wrap around my neck five times so it wouldn’t touch the ground, and I thanked him profusely for it before he shooed us away with the same excuse as my parents had used.  


“Nap! Tem! Merry Christmas!”  


Razz was left a little start struck when Nap let us into his house. Temmie heard me and booked down the stairs with a new red and black sweater on, greeting me enthusiastically and gasping when I gave her my present. I laughed and had to assure her it was meant for her before giving Nap his as well. He seemed surprised he had received anything and he thanked me for the repair kit I had gotten him. I apologized that I hadn’t really known what to get him but he assured me that it would definitely be used, apparently Temmie had lost some of his tools a few weeks ago and Nap hadn’t found the time to replace them yet. Temmie denied doing anything of the sort before thanking me for the hat I had gotten for her. Once again I was left apologizing for not really knowing what to get her but she enthusiastically reassured me that she loved it. 

They sent us away with lots of cookies Nap and Temmie had baked together and Temmie told me she was going to get a matching hat for me. I told her I’d hold her to that promise and we went on our way.  


“Alright, time to see if everyone else is busy.” I said, shifting my bag to one arm and digging into my pocket for my phone. I dialed the Fell’s phone first and it picked up after three rings.  


“WHAT DO YOU WANT?”  


“Merry Christmas, Fell! Are you and Red busy right now?” I didn’t let his annoyed tone get to me and greeted him cheerily.  


“Ugh, do we have to start with them?” Razz groaned and I waved my hand at him to be quiet.  


“WE ARE AT HOME CURRENTLY BUT WE ARE HAVING GUESTS OVER IN TWO HOURS. IF WHATEVER THIS IS CANNOT WAIT YOU MAY COME BY RIGHT NOW BUT OTHERWISE DO NOT BOTHER.” Fell told me.  


“Alright, we’ll see you soon, Fell.” I hung up with him and dialed Ink’s number.  


“Hello!”  


“Hey, Ink! Merry Christmas! Are you busy right now?” I greeted Ink.  


“Merry Gyftmas! Error and I are binge watching some telenovela Error loves, but it’s kinda boring…”  


“It is not boring! Undernovela is a work of art!” I heard Error yell at Ink in the background and it almost sounded like something was playing on a TV, but it was in Spanish?  


“Ah, okay, I didn’t mean to bother you two, sorry.”  


“No it’s okay! You have gifts for everyone in the other universes too, right?” I didn’t get a chance to ask how Ink knew or answer as he continued on. “So I’ll come get you and we can go to each universe and see everyone and give them presents! Because Blue and Papyrus have already called and asked me if I could deliver some multiversal presents too, but I figured it might be nicer if everyone saw each other to exchange presents.” Ink took a deep breath. “And Error can come too!”  


There was silence for a moment before Error very loudly told Ink that Gyftmas was a waste of time and getting gifts for other people was a waste of money and effort and he wasn’t going to join us. Ink argued with him for a moment, sounding disappointed, but Error seemed firm in his decision. 

Eventually Ink gave up and sighed and he told me he would be by soon before hanging up with me.  


“Thanks for always carting us around, Ink. We really have to figure a way between universes without having to call you all the time.” Ink brushed it off, saying it wasn’t a problem, he liked visiting our universes and being around everyone. I still felt bad about always troubling him whenever we wanted to go to the other universes but he really didn’t seem to mind so I didn’t push the issue.  


We dropped by the Fell universe first and Fell seemed mildly surprised about receiving a present before boasting that “OF COURSE THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS WOULD RECEIVE MANY PRESENTS SINCE HE HAS SO MANY ADMIRERS" I hummed along, deciding to let him go with the idea, and Red thanked me both for his present and his brother’s present and apologized for not getting us anything. I waved it off and told him I was just glad both of them liked their presents, it had been hard coming up with something to meet Fell's high standards. 

Of course this only egged Fell on more and Red chuckled as his brother monologued about how great he was. Razz got annoyed and started arguing with him that he wasn't as great as he kept claiming he was and Fell argued that he was. I rolled my eyes and called Papyrus next to ask him if it was okay to drop by for a little bit. He agreed, warning me that Frisk and their friends were coming over later for dinner, but he was always glad to have his friends over. 

Syrup managed to pry Razz away from his argument with Fell and Red waved us goodbye before Ink took us to the next universe.  


“Merry Christmas, Papyrus!”  


“MERRY GYFTMAS TO YOU AS WELL, HUMAN FRIEND!”  


Sans was sleeping on the couch when we dropped by and Papyrus tried to no avail to get him to get up. _“FOR PETE’S SAKE, SANS! OUR FRIENDS ARE HERE! YOU ARE SETTING A TERRIBLE EXAMPLE!” “‘m sure pete won’t mind too much.” “NYEEEHHHH”_

We ended up balancing our gifts on Sans’s back (Syrup started it) and we gave Papyrus his. He gasped as he opened them and grabbed all of us into a big group hug that lifted Razz and I off the ground. Razz complained and I groaned when Syrup took the opportunity to tighten the hug, crushing me in a pile of pointy bones.  


Eventually we were released and Papyrus gave us each our own gifts, sockets sparkling as we opened them. I got three boxes of spaghetti, all “FINELY AGED IN AN OAKEN CASK SO YOU CAN BE JUST AS GREAT OF A SPAGHETTORE AS THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS!” I thanked him for my gift and assured him that I would do my best to follow in master chef Papyrus’s footsteps. 

Papyrus seemed pleased with our reactions to our gifts (Syrup had gotten even more boxes of pasta and Razz had received a box of his own as well as a book on puzzles and even Ink had received pasta and a few art supplies) and he was sad to turn down the invitation to join us to go to Underswap, saying that he needed to prepare dinner for when everyone came over, though he really would have loved to have given the rest of his presents to the other universes. I wondered if all of Papyrus's presents contained pasta like ours did.  


Papyrus did assure us though that he would give his presents to everyone the next time we all got together and I remembered to call Blue to be sure that it was okay to drop by. He said that he and Honey were going out later to have dinner with Chara and their friends, but that it was okay to drop by now if we wanted. I told him we’d be over shortly and we hung up, saying our goodbyes to Papyrus and Sans before Ink brought us to Underswap.  


“Merry Christmas, Blue! Merry Christmas, Honey!”  


“merry gyftmas, kiddo. nice ta see ya.”  


“MERRY GYFTMAS, HUMAN! I’M GLAD TO SEE YOU! I HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL TO GIVE YOU!” 

I got a little flustered when Blue bounced away and returned with gifts for Razz, Syrup, Ink and I. He waited with bated breath and starry eyelights for us to open them and Honey chuckled from his place on the couch as I hesitantly tore at the wrapping paper. I got a nice cookbook full of recipes for lots of sweets and desserts and I thanked Blue before handing him and Honey their own presents.  


Blue was ecstatic to open his gift and he thanked me with starry eyelights for the present. I flushed and brushed it off, saying it was nothing and only getting more flustered as Blue insisted that it was. Honey seemed amused at mine and Blue’s reactions and thanked me for his gift as well when Blue finally moved on to Razz and Syrup to thank them as well. Ink apologized for not getting him anything and Blue brushed it off, assuring him that giving was more important than getting. 

Eventually Honey reminded Blue that they would have to leave soon and Blue apologized that the visit was cut short. We told him it was fine and we said our goodbyes to the two before Ink brought us back to our own universe.  


“Oh, hey Ink, could you give this to Error when you see him? I have one for you too.” I asked the artist before he could leave.  


“Sure! Thanks, --! Merry Gyftmas!” Ink agreed, accepting the two presents and giving me a mock salute. I chuckled and returned it.  


“Merry Gyftmas, Ink.”  


After Ink left, Razz went back to the kitchen and Syrup and I followed after him, making ourselves comfortable at the table once again while Razz cooked. Cinnamon made themself comfortable on my lap and we made small talk about random things as we waited for dinner to finish. 

After a fantastic meal, we spent the rest of the night critiquing old Christmas movies while trying to fight off sleep. It was a losing battle, however, as the warmth of the house, the blankets over us, and our comfortably full stomachs found us drifting off to sleep faster than we planned for.  


_Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for posting this so late, I got busy at relatives' houses today. I'm not super happy with the final part, but, eh, there were some cute parts in it so I thought I'd post it. 
> 
> I hope you all had wonderful holidays!


	27. Bitty bones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Ink finds some small skeletons interesting times are sure to occur.

The TV was on and only Razz and I were home doing nothing. Razz had taken to lying across me for one reason or another, not saying anything, and I was half watching the TV and half rubbing Razz’s back. The show was just some old rerun of a soap opera I didn’t care too much about. _Man, how old am I getting? Actually passing my time watching these things…_ Razz shrugged his shoulders and I resumed rubbing his back.  


A knock on the door startled both of us. _Who’s knocking at eight o’clock at night?_ Razz seemed to be wondering the same thing as he looked over at the door and listened, magic ready and alert. It hadn’t sounded like anyone we knew, since Alphys would be knocking _down_ our door and Syrup didn’t knock unless he was drunk. But it didn’t come again. 

My paranoia crept in and I muted the TV, listening intently. Razz pushed himself up and stood, going to the window and shifting the curtains enough to peer outside. I saw the sides of his teeth twitch downwards into a frown as he let the curtains fall back into place and went over to the door, not sneaking anymore and leading me to think it was either someone we knew, someone had just ding dong ditched us, or Razz was about to beat up whoever was outside.  


I stayed on the couch as Razz opened the door with a less than happy expression. 

“Hey Razz!” Ink, apparently, said happily, pushing past Razz and into the house, bringing a large cardboard box with him. Ink’s eyelights flitted over to me and he smiled widely. “I have something really cool to show you guys! I found them while I was visiting another universe! I think it was called Bittybones?” Ink said, eyelights changing to question marks for a second before he shrugged and happily set the box down.  


“We don’t want it” Razz was quick to deny as he shut the door and frowned over at his counterpart.  


“You’re right! We should get everyone over here! After all, I have some for everyone!” Ink said, not listening to Razz as he perked up and pulled his phone out of his pocket. I looked curiously at the box that was still closed and wondered what could be inside. _Bittybones? What is that?_  


“Hey Dream! Do you want to bring everyone over to Swapfell? Yeah, Razz’s house is where we’re meeting. No, he doesn’t mind.” Razz looked like he was about to argue this point but Ink just barged on. “Okay! Thanks, see you!” Ink was quick to hang up and dial another number, giving Razz no chance to argue before he put the phone up to his skull again and tapped his foot. 

“Hey! This is Ink! Yeah I’m calling because I’m at your house and found your brother and human knocked unconscious in the living room. Yeah, you better get home quick! Okay, bye!” Ink hung up and smiled, holding up a hand and holding up three fingers, letting each one drop one after the other.  


Syrup teleported into the living room just as Ink’s last finger dropped, looking around wildly before seeing us and calming down. He shot Ink a dirty look. 

Just then there was a small outwards push of magic and Dream and the three other universes were standing in the living room, all seeming a little confused. _Why did Ink call everyone here?_ I hoped it was because we were getting some super secret mission, but if he said he brought something for everyone that probably wasn’t the case. _How disappointing._  


“what the hell didja need us for, ink? i was busy, ya know. this had better be important.” Red spoke up, glaring at the artful skeleton. He looked a little tired with a red tinge to his eye sockets, maybe like he had just woken up.  


“YOU WERE SLEEPING, SANS, DO NOT TRY AND USE THAT AS AN EXCUSE.” So I was right. Fell narrowed his eyes at his brother. “I, ON THE OTHER HAND, WAS BUSY WITH ACTUAL IMPORTANT THINGS. WHY DID YOU CALL US HERE?” Fell took up his brother’s question and Red grumbled.  


“Oh, that’s right! Because I want to show you all something!” Ink replied cheerily, perking up again. He bent down next to the cardboard box he had carried in and everyone watched, suddenly realizing that it was there, as he threw open the lid and smiled widely at whatever its contents were.  


Everyone got closer to the box to look in curiously, even Red and Fell peering in in interest. Inside the box were maybe eight tiny skeletons, all of them resembling the brothers from each universe and sleeping over each other. Even the largest couldn’t have been much bigger than the length of my hand from fingertips to wrist. 

“What the fuck?” Razz found his voice first as he furrowed his brow at the contents of the box and looked back at Ink. 

I noticed movement from one of them, one that looked like Sans, as he cracked an eye socket open and tensed as his eye light traveled over everyone, who, other than me, were all looking at Ink in varying forms of confusion or anger for an answer. 

The small skeleton’s eye light found me and studied me as I studied him in return. So they were alive. But why were they so small?  


“They’re called bitties! The universe I went to…” I only half listened to Ink as he explained that these smaller skeletons, these bitties, were from another universe he had visited. Apparently he had found them alongside a store in some alley, all asleep in the box and Ink had just… taken them. _What the fuck, Ink?_ I shook my head and looked up to Ink, not paying much mind to the little Sans’s suspicious gaze that followed.  


“SO WHAT DO YOU EXPECT US TO DO WITH THEM?” Fell asked when Ink had finished his explanation, glaring at him. He glanced briefly at the box and I noticed the little Sans close his socket.  


Ink smiled lopsidedly. “I dunno, I just thought they were cool.” Ink shrugged, looking down at the box as well.  


“WELL, THEY ARE RATHER ADORABLE!” Papyrus said, smiling unsurely as he looked down in the box. 

As everyone else looked back to the box I thought I saw the little Sans tense. A feeling of protectiveness washed over me and I moved closer to the box. I had no idea how fragile these little skeletons were and I was going to make sure they were okay, especially if some of the rowdier skeletons got a hold of them.  


“CAN WE WAKE THEM UP?” Blue asked, looking down into the box with stars in his sockets and a smile on his face. “IF THEY ARE OUR COUNTERPARTS I’M SURPRISED MINE HAS STAYED ASLEEP FOR SO LONG!”  


“you sleep in all the time, bro.” Honey said, grinning funnily at his brother.  


“WHAT? YOU’RE CRAZY” Blue denied, shaking his head happily.  


“AT THE VERY LEAST I AM SURPRISED AT HOW LONG MINE HAS SLEPT. ARE YOU SURE THEY AREN’T FALLING?” Fell said, looking down into the box again and eyeing the tiny skeleton that resembled him.  


“Hmm” Ink hummed, not answering as he crouched down and prodded the small version of Fell. The tiny skeleton grumbled and turned away from his finger but Ink kept at it. 

This resulted in him almost losing a finger as the bitty snapped awake and had a wave of tiny sharpened bones shooting towards where Ink’s finger had been just a second before. They impaled the wall of the cardboard box instead and stuck through to the other side.  


Red whistled lowly. “damn, he’s got some fight in ‘im. not that i’d expect any less from the boss”  


“TSK, OF COURSE MY COUNTERPART WOULD BE JUST AS VIGILANT AS I AM. IT ONLY MAKES SENSE.” Fell said, cheek bones flushing a light red as he frowned down at the bitty. 

Said bitty was glaring back up at everyone and it was then that I noticed the small Sans was no longer in the box.  


I felt a tug on my hair and looked over at my right shoulder. The little Sans was there, looking worried but not meeting my eyes. I was a little confused as to how he got there but figured, if Fell’s bitty’s display had been anything, that they still had some form of magic. 

“heya, where the hell am i? and why is there a bigger version of me and everyone else?” The little Sans asked, looking out around at everyone guardedly before looking back to me, his left eye flickering blue. I could feel his magic, not as powerful as a full sized monster’s, but it could probably do some damage.  


“We’re in my house. A friend of mine picked you and everyone up off a street. The-uh-the reason that there’s-um-full sized versions of you and everyone is because they’re from different universes?” I tried, unsure how the little Sans would take it. 

There was a commotion going on now as Fell’s bitty had managed to wake every other tiny skeleton and was yelling at everyone. Fell, of course, was yelling right back at him and the other tiny skeletons in the box were either guarded or confused. Razz’s bitty had started yelling too. _Oh boy._  


“oh” Was the only response I got from the little skeleton standing on my shoulder and clinging onto my hair to keep himself steady. He gazed back down at the box where both Fell and Razz were having yell offs with their bitties and magic permeated the room from the others. 

Red and Syrup were standing back just a little bit from the box but were having stare offs with their own bitties while Honey and Sans watched the chaos from further away and kept a close eye on their brothers and their smaller counterparts. Well, Honey was watching the smaller version of him who was watching everything cautiously but Sans had a crinkle in his brow as his eye lights scanned the room for his own. 

Ink was still antagonizing Fell’s bitty whenever he got too distracted with yelling at his larger counterpart and continued to almost get impaled by tiny bones. The only ones who seemed interested in meeting each other civilly were Papyrus and Blue’s bitties who looked nervous but were doing their best to smile at the skeletons who weren’t trying to kill their companions. 

The little Sans grimaced and I hummed my agreement.  


“HELLO LITTLER ME! IT IS WONDERFUL TO MEET YOU!” Papyrus greeted his bitty, stooping next to the box but remaining far enough back that he wouldn’t get caught up in the little magic attacks that the other bitties had at the ready. Sans’s eye lights stopped their search and focused back on his brother.  


“HELLO!” The little Papyrus greeted back in a squeaky voice. My heart melted a little. I heard the Sans on my shoulder chuckle and relax just a little. “I’M SORRY, I DIDN’T THINK I WOULD BE MEETING A LARGER VERSION OF ME OR MY FRIENDS TODAY OR I WOULD HAVE TRIED TO LOOK A LITTLE NICER!”  


“THAT’S OKAY, LITTLE ME!” Papyrus said, smiling and sitting down on the floor now that he knew the bitty was willing to talk. “MY FRIEND DID JUST TAKE YOU OFF THE STREET, SO I APOLOGIZE FOR THE SUDDEN CHANGE AS WELL! NYEH HEH HEH” Papyrus laughed unsurely, glancing over at where Ink was having too much fun putting his finger in the way of danger. 

“UM, WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME OUT OF THAT BOX? I, ER, WOULDN’T WANT YOU GETTING HURT SINCE ALL OF MY FRIENDS SEEM TO BE SORTING THEIR DIFFERENCES IN A… LESS THAN IDEAL MANNER.” Papyrus asked, looking around as his teeth twitched into a small frown. It was quickly wiped away as he looked back at the bitty for an answer.  


Blue, meanwhile, was having a similar conversation with his own bitty, but he had gotten a lot closer to the side of the box. _Living life on the edge. What a dangerous marshmallow._ The Sans snorted on my shoulder and I looked over at him in confusion. He had one hand covering his teeth as the other gripped my hair, but he was doing a poor job of hiding his amused smile. 

“What’s so funny?” I asked him.  


“heh, heh, ‘dangerous marshmallow’.” He snickered. _Had I said that out loud?_ I wondered as the little Sans continued to snicker on my shoulder. I smiled anyways and brushed it off. Sometimes I just couldn’t keep my thoughts to myself.  


Papyrus had managed to get closer to the box without notice from the others besides his bitty and his brother, the former who was waiting expectantly to be lifted out of the box and the latter who was watching and ready to pull his brother away if things got out of hand. 

Papyrus gingerly reached down into the box, shooting the Fell bitties a furtive glance to make sure they were distracted. The only one who had seemed to notice was Honey’s bitty who took the opportunity to shuffle towards the two Papyruses. He said something to Papyrus that I couldn’t hear over the din of the living room and I noticed both Sans and Honey watching the littler skeleton suspiciously. Papyrus, however, nodded happily, a wide smile showing over his teeth as he set his gloved hands down on the bottom of the box and both bitties climbed onto each, grasping his fingers when he curled them lightly around the two and lifted them free of the cardboard walls. 

Blue noticed and asked if his bitty would like the same, earning a cheery affirmative and the little Blue was soon scooped out of the box and brought away from the din towards the calmer of the group.  


I moved backwards towards the three other skeletons and bitties and the little Sans on my shoulder held onto my hair a little tighter, keeping himself steady. 

“Pretty crazy night, huh?” I commented, looking up towards Sans and Honey as Papyrus and Blue put their charges down on the ground. 

The small Honey looked around before his eyes landed on my shoulder and he quirked a lopsided smile at the Sans. They must have had some silent conversation because I saw the small hoodied skeleton shrug and make himself comfortable against Papyrus’s leg. Papyrus smiled down at him before returning to whatever conversation he, Blue, and their two bitties were having.  


“tell me about it.” Honey said, chuckling as he, no longer having to worry too much about his brother, sat down on the ground next to me, crossing his long legs and idly poking at his smaller version. The little skeleton cracked open a socket at him and grinned before disappearing. Honey jumped, startled, and there was soft chuckling from his hood. 

“nyeh heh, guess i deserved that.” Honey said, calming down and chuckling as well. He looked back at me, grinning. “still don’t know how i feel about ink just grabbin these guys off the street, but these three seem chill enough.” He glanced at the box that looked more like a warzone with various tiny sharpened bones piercing the cardboard and more still being thrown at the larger skeletons.  


“hey, bud, don’t just give me the cold shoulder over here. i think i’m pretty chill.” The little Sans spoke up, bringing Honey’s and Sans’s eyes to my shoulder where I had almost forgotten the little skeleton still was.  


“SO THAT IS WHERE YOUR LITTLE COUNTERPART WENT SANS! HE WAS JUST HANGING OUT WITH OUR VERY COOL HUMAN FRIEND!” Papyrus said, looking over happily and making my cheeks heat at the compliment. The little Sans blew air out of his nasal cavity in amusement.  


“heh, well, ice ta meet ya, little me. name’s sans, sans the skeleton, case ya couldn’t guess already.” Sans introduced, hands in his sweatshirt pockets as he winked at his smaller version. “do you guys have names? might be a little confusin if we’re all usin the same ones.”  


“NOPE!” The little Blue answered enthusiastically, small stars in his sockets as he looked at Sans. “WE DIDN’T HAVE ANY OWNERS BEFORE SO WE NEVER GOT NAMES! WE DO HAVE TYPES, BUT THEY’RE NOT OUR NAMES.”  


“Types?” I echoed, confused while Blue lamented over them not having names and Honey questioned the whole ‘owners’ thing.  


“heh, yeah” The Sans on my shoulder spoke up, making me turn my curious gaze to him. Honey looked over at him as well, curiosity on his features as he leaned back against his hands and soft snores emanated from his hood. 

“bitties are kinda like the next step up from pets, even if we’re technically put under the ‘pets’ label.” He grimaced at this and I thought it might be a sour subject. “so we have types. my type is called sansy, that’s a baby blue” He pointed to the little Blue. “that’s a papy.” He pointed to the little Papyrus next and something clicked.  


“So you’re not related?” I asked, pondering as I realized the little Sans didn’t seem as familial with the Papyrus as the brothers did with each other, no matter what universe they were from.  


The Sans looked at me in confusion. “why would we be?”  


I blinked as Honey traded glances between him and the little Papyrus. He hummed and looked at the little Blue before tapping his hood, the snores stuttering to a stop. “do you have a brother?” Honey asked, craning his neck to look back as far as he could. 

The little skeleton in his hood shifted around before clambering out onto Honey’s shoulder, blinking tiredly and stifling a yawn. 

“what?”  


“do you have a brother?” Honey repeated, looking at his bitty more fully now that he could see him. 

The little Sans seemed confused by this interrogation as he looked back and forth between himself, the little Papyrus, and the Undertale brothers. Something seemed to click in his mind as the little Honey shook his head in the negative, tiredly leaning back against Honey’s vertebrae and letting his sockets droop closed.  


“so i take it all our 'larger selves' are related?" The little Sans asked, putting two and two together.  


"you could say that." Sans spoke up, watching our conversation with a lazy grin. "'m related to paps" He pointed his brother out. "'n honey n blue 're bros and so are fell n red and razz n syrup" Sans explained, pointing each out as he spoke.  


"They're all alternate versions of each other" I elaborated when the little Sans gave me an odd look. "Sans and Papyrus are from Undertale, Honey and Blue are from Underswap, Fell and Red are from Underfell, and Razz and Syrup are from Swapfell." I explained, gesturing to each pair. The little Sans made an "oh" sound and nodded.  


"SO THAT IS WHY WE ALL LOOK ALIKE!" The little Blue made the connection, smiling widely at me. The Sans hummed his understanding and sat down on my shoulder, making himself more comfortable against my neck.  


"WHICH UNIVERSE ARE YOU FROM, HUMAN?" The little Papyrus asked me, tilting his head curiously.  


"I'm from Swapfell. Don't know if that's a good thing or not." I muttered, looking back towards my two skeletons still glaring at their little counterparts. 

Razz had summoned a wave of sharpened bones behind him but his little counterpart wasn't backing off. Syrup was just working on his intimidation tactic, standing back and glaring at his bitty who returned it with a cool gaze.  


"YOU CAN ALWAYS VISIT OUR UNIVERSE IF YOU WANT, --!" Blue told me, stars in his sockets as he smiled.  


"AND OURS TOO, COOL HUMAN FRIEND! I AM SURE YOU COULD USE MORE PAPYRUS IN YOUR LIFE!" Papyrus offered too, smiling happily.  


"nyeh heh, both versions are pretty great after all." Honey added, nudging my side with a grin.  


"You guys are the best. I'll keep it in mind, thanks." I agreed, smiling back and shifting on the floor to be leaning against my hands with my legs outstretched in front of me.  


“So back to types, since we got a little cut off…” I brought the subject up again, glancing at the little Sans, Sansy, I guess, on my shoulder.  


“right. he’s a lil’ bro” The Sans pointed to Honey’s companion who was drowsily staying awake. He waved with a tired grin.  


“BECAUSE I’M OLDER! EVEN THOUGH EVERYONE THINKS PAPY IS!” Blue shouted, pointing an accusing finger at his brother.  


“wait. really?” Sans asked, looking at Blue with a half incredulous grin.  


“YES” Blue pouted, crossing his arms as Honey snickered.  


“It would make sense. Razz is older than Syrup too, even if he acts like a little bitch sometimes.” I said, mumbling the last part.  


“DON’T TALK ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK!” Razz yelled at me from across the room. _How can he always hear when someone’s talking about him?_  


“AND PLEASE WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE!” Blue added.  


“right, anyways,” The little Sans continued, looking back to our small congregation after having glanced at Razz. “the one getting prodded by that artist guy is a boss, but everyone calls him batman. he hates it.” This earned a snicker from Honey’s companion who was still managing to keep himself awake. “the shorter one decked out in black and red is edgymcmychemicalromance. everyone calls him edgy fer short.” Another snicker, louder this time as the Sans tried to contain a grin. The little Papyrus had rolled his sockets at this, so I didn’t know how much of it was true. “purple is a cherry n the tall guy’s a slim. got any more questions?”  


“CAN WE HELP YOU PICK OUT NAMES? I DON’T THINK IT’S RIGHT THAT YOU SHOULD HAVE TO BE CALLED BY YOUR TYPE.” Blue asked, frowning a little as he looked up from the conversation he was having with his mini me.  


“uh”  


“USUALLY NAME CHOOSING HAPPENS WHEN WE GET OWNERS!” The little Blue cut the hesitant Sans off. “UNLESS YOU WANT TO ADOPT ME, BIGGER ME!” The little skeleton’s eyes were sparkling as he clasped his hands together and looked hopefully up at his larger counterpart.  


“I WOULD LOVE-”  


“bro, we can’t just go adoptin some smaller versions of ourselves.” Honey cut him off, giving his brother a stern look. Both deflated. “this isn’t their universe and we don’t know how we would hafta take care of ‘em anyway.”  


“IT’S NOT THAT HARD…” The little Blue said, frowning.  


“we could be takin ‘em away from potential… owners” Honey grimaced at the word. “who actually know what they’re doin and can give ‘em a better life than we can. not to mention we’ve got a lot on our hands already, bro” Honey said, looking apologetically at Blue and the smaller skeleton. 

Both Papyrus, large and small, had deflated as well as the truth of Honey’s statement sunk in. Even Honey’s companion seemed a little disheartened.  


“don’t think anyone’d be adoptin us anytime soon...” The little Sans murmured, grabbing my attention. I looked at him and saw him frowning towards the cardboard box, seeming to be lost in thought. I felt a little disheartened at the news as well. But it would be irresponsible to keep them. We wouldn’t even know where to start in taking care of them.  


“IT’S OKAY, FRIENDS!” The little Papyrus spoke up, smiling reassuringly at all of us. “I AM SURE WE WILL FIND HOMES EVENTUALLY. FOR NOW THOUGH IF YOU WANT YOU CAN GIVE ME A NICKNAME, SO I WON’T BE SO CONFUSED WHEN SOMEONE CALLS MY NAME BUT ISN’T TALKING TO ME!” He encouraged, smiling brightly and lightening the mood. You can always count on Papyrus to make you feel better, even if it’s a small version of him. I smiled back and thought. What would be good nicknames for them?  


“THAT’S OKAY WITH ME TOO! I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A NICKNAME!” The little Blue agreed, bouncing back happy as ever.  


“well if you guys’re thinkin up nicknames for them, might as well give me one too.” Honey’s companion spoke up, grinning lazily and winking at me when I looked over at him. The little Sans on my shoulder didn’t speak and I wondered if he didn’t want a nickname from people who he might never see again. _Because then we’ll all get too attached._ The thought hit me and I grimaced.  


“WELL, UM, HOW DOES, ER, BERRY? NO, WAIT, I CAN COME UP WITH A BETTER ONE” Blue was having trouble coming up with a nickname for his smaller self who was eagerly awaiting the verdict. “UM, WHAT ABOUT? NO, THAT’S BAD TOO. UGH! I DIDN’T KNOW A SIMPLE NICKNAME WOULD BE SO HARD TO COME UP WITH!”  


“bro you’re about as good at naming things as the queen.” Honey chuckled.  


“BE QUIET, PAPY.” Blue shot his brother a dirty look. “UM, I THINK I NEED MORE TIME.” Blue hesitated before looking at his bitty sheepishly.  


“IT’S OKAY! TAKE YOUR TIME!”  


“alright, how about for little me we call ‘im stretch.” Honey suggested, looking at his smaller version for confirmation or denial.  


“heh, sounds like a bit of a stretch to me, but i like it.” The small skeleton, now nicknamed Stretch, responded, winking. He relaxed back into Honey’s vertebrae, content with his new nickname, and closed his sockets as Honey smiled in amusement.  


“OH! I’VE GOT ONE!” Papyrus spoke up, looking up excitedly from staring at his bitty. He looked back down at his smaller version. “DOES RUS SOUND OKAY TO YOU?”  


“THAT SOUNDS GREAT! A GREAT NAME TO FIT AN EVEN GREATER SKELETON. NYEH HEH HEH!” The newly nicknamed Rus laughed, posing dramatically with his little scarf fluttering behind him.  


“NYEH HEH! I AM GLAD YOU LIKE IT, LITTLE ME!” Papyrus said.  


Everyone looked over to Blue except Sans, who was watching his bitty on my shoulder with a hard to read expression. Blue sweated under the pressure. “WHAT ABOUT BLUES?”  


“like the music genre?” Sans asked, expression confused as he looked towards his counterpart. Perspiration beaded on Blue’s skull.  


“And what if we’re talking about possession?” I asked. “If I say Blue’s scarf how are we going to know which Blue I’m talking about? The only way to tell is if you read everything I said.”  


“AND AS FAR AS I KNOW ONLY THE READERS HAVE THE ABILITY TO DO THAT” Papyrus added, seeming thoughtful. 

More perspiration beaded on Blue’s skull as we all looked at him.  


“UM, BERRY IS OKAY THEN. IF IT’S OKAY WITH YOU? IF NOT I CAN DEFINITELY THINK OF A BETTER ONE. I’M NOT GIVING UP. I JUST, UM, NEED MORE TIME IF I’M GOING TO HAVE TO THINK OF ANOTHER ONE.” Blue said, looking down at his bitty with a strained smile.  


“BERRY IS GREAT! I LOVE IT!” The newly nicknamed Berry said, bouncing happily in place as Blue let out a sigh of relief.  


“I’M GLAD.” Honey snorted in amusement. “I MEAN, MWEH HEH! OF COURSE YOU WOULD LIKE IT! I AM GREAT AT COMING UP WITH NAMES AFTER ALL!”  


“you sure are the best, bro” Honey said, grinning widely at his brother.  


“I AM?” Blue asked, looking confused for a moment. “I MEAN, I AM! MWEH HEH HEH” Blue laughed, posing, before promptly falling backwards and staring up at the ceiling. “WHAT A TIRING DAY.” His eye lights slid over to Honey. “I SUPPOSE SINCE IT IS ALMOST NIGHT TIME WE CAN’T, IN OUR GOOD JUDGEMENT, SEND OUR SMALLER SELVES BACK OUT INTO THE COLD WITH NO SHELTER OR CARE. IT LOOKS LIKE WE WILL HAVE TO KEEP THEM HERE WHILE WE SLEEP OVER. OH WELL.” _What a manipulator!_ I thought, looking at Blue in shock as he kept a completely straight face all the while staring his brother down. 

Honey sighed and rolled his eyes. “guess so” 

Blue grinned and the smaller skeletons with us perked up. _I’m so proud of him._  


“NO ONE IS SLEEPING OVER AND WE ARE NOT KEEPING THESE MINIATURE MENACES IN THIS HOUSEHOLD. THEY CAN FREEZE FOR ALL I CARE.” _Why is Razz being so loud tonight?_ I wondered, rubbing at my ear as Razz’s voice pierced my brain. I don’t know why I could handle everyone else screaming all the time, but as soon as Razz starts it hurt. 

The little Sans on my shoulder winced as well and pushed himself closer to my neck. I could feel his magic swirling defensively as Razz tromped over to our group to ruin our fun. _Party pooper._ I thought, rolling my eyes. 

A few small but sharp bones flew after Razz and he deflected them with a conjured bone of his own without looking back.  


“Razz don’t be such an ass, they can sleep over and the bitties can at least stay the night. It’s getting late out and temperatures have been dropping, they don’t need to freeze just because you’ve finally noticed how annoying living with yourself can be.” I said, gazing at the short skeleton coolly. I noticed the Sans on my shoulder look at me incredulously as the others, full sized and bitties alike, backed slowly away.  


“YOU DON’T GET A SAY IN THIS.” Razz said, pointing a sharp bone at me threateningly.  


“Stop yelling, I thought you were older than me. You certainly aren’t acting like it and I have just as much say in who stays at our house as you do.” I said, glaring back at him and raising my head, daring him to get that bone any closer.  


“I don’t see you buying many meals for the house” Razz said, glaring still but lowering his voice and his sharpened weapon.  


“And I don’t see you paying all of the bills. It’s a joint effort, Razz. Unless you’d rather kick me out of the house, pay for everything on your own, and be out a friend just to have jurisdiction over who can and can’t stay here for a single night, then be my guest.” I bit back. If he wanted full say over the house, he’d have to kick me out first. And, well, if he kicked me out for something as selfish as getting to decide who stayed over and who didn’t for a sleepover of all things, then he would definitely lose a friend.  


I noticed a slight purple climb up Razz’s cheeks as he glared at me. “Fine, Jesus, they can fucking stay. Don’t expect me to share my room though, those little menaces can stay with you. Have fun.” He smirked at this last statement as he turned away and walked off to the kitchen. His bitty yelled after him for being a coward, but Razz didn’t look back.  


“holy hell” The Sans on my shoulder breathed, slumping against me and letting his magic dissipate.  


“What?” I asked, looking at him in confusion.  


He looked back at me like I was crazy. “did you not just talk to that guy? his magic was overpowering, but you got him to back down without even lifting a finger. i knew humans were strong but holy crap.” He breathed, looking at me in what I thought might be a little admiration.  


“nyeh heh, i guess it is a good thing you’re from swapfell, hun.” Honey spoke up, moving back over to me and letting out a nervous breath. Stretch was giving me just as incredulous of a look as I had received from the little Sans.  


“Why’s that?” I asked, suspicion creeping into my tone.  


Honey looked at me, brief confusion flashing over his features before he relaxed and chuckled, rubbing my head. “you know how to handle razz and syrup for starters. and you sure aren’t just some pushover.”  


“UNLIKE ONE HUMAN I MET WHO FELL OVER AT THE LIGHTEST TOUCH.” Blue said, putting a hand to his chin in thought. He still hadn’t sat up from the ground and had been the only one not to back away when Razz came over. _Definitely a dangerous marshmallow._ The Sans on my shoulder snorted as Honey had to explain to Blue that that’s not exactly what pushover means.  


“SO YOU’RE THE HUMAN THAT THAT WEAKLING I WAS BATTLING LEFT FOR. I CAN’T BELIEVE HE LET HIMSELF BE OVERCOME BY SUCH A USELESS CREATURE.” Razz’s bitty spoke up by my feet, startling me as the mix of his higher pitched voice and loudness hurt my ears. _How did he get out of the box?_ I looked over to the cardboard box and noticed that no one was left inside it. Apparently they had all gotten out some way or another and were now confronting their larger selves amongst the room.  


Syrup had backed against a wall and was still glaring at his bitty who had summoned miniature blasters and was pointing them at Syrup. 

Red was role reversed, bearing down on his bitty with a cruel grin as a large blaster floated behind him and the smaller him stood against the wall, bearing his teeth as his eye lights darted around for an out. He attempted to teleport away but Red summoned a wall of blue bones around him with a snap of his fingers, trapping him. 

Fell and his bitty were having a full fledged war, sending waves of bones at each other in an actual confrontation that thankfully didn’t do as much damage to the living room as I thought Red’s blasters would. 

And then there was Ink, watching the entire scene with an amused smile as he sat safely in the middle of it all.  


I felt a sharp pain burn into my foot and I sucked in a breath, looking down at my right foot where multiple little bones pierced through my sock. The little Razz was grinning smugly at me. “YOU SHOULDN’T IGNORE ME, USELESS PEASANT. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS.” I glared at the smug skeleton as the Sans’s magic swirled up again.  


“leave ‘er alone, cherry.” The Sans growled, glaring down at the skeleton as well.  


The skeleton smirked up at him. “WHAT? YOU THINK THIS WENCH IS GOING TO PROVIDE YOU A HOME? AFTER SO MANY TIMES OF BEING RETURNED AND BEING ABANDONED I’M SURPRISED YOU STILL THINK ANYONE WANTS YOU.” 

The Sans growled again and his magic manifested into small bones. The small Razz huffed in amusement, crossing his arms. “YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING TO HARM ME? I’D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY.”  


“CHERRY, YOU DON’T NEED TO BE MEAN.” Berry said, stepping up and frowning at the other. Apparently they had already given Razz’s bitty a nickname, or they just called each other by their ‘types’.  


"HAH, WHY SHOULDN'T I? I KNOW YOU ALL EXPECT THAT YOU'LL BE ADOPTED BY THESE IDIOTS. SO MAYBE YOU SHOULD SHOW THEM WHAT YOU'RE REALLY LIKE. BECAUSE I'M SURE THERE WILL BE NO QUESTION ABOUT SENDING US BACK ONTO THE STREETS ONCE THEY FIND OUT." Cherry, I suppose, said, looking smugly at the other bitties. Berry looked a little uncomfortable at this.  


"CHERRY, THEY'RE NICE PEOPLE." Rus said, moving over to my foot and gently removing the bones. I winced when he pulled out one that had gone a little deeper than the rest. 

"SORRY" He apologized, wincing in sympathy when blood pooled at the opened wounds and stained my already ruined sock.  


"EVERYONE IS A NICE PERSON TO YOU" Cherry sneered, crossing his arms. Rus stayed silent and rubbed my foot with a small frown, green magic at his fingertips. The wounds felt better but there was nothing to do about my socks.  


"Thank you, Rus"  


"NO PROBLEM, FRIEND." He said, smiling lightly back up at me. There was something sad in his sockets that pulled at my heart strings. I wished that I could help give them a home. 

"DON'T WORRY, I AM SURE WE WILL FIND HOMES!" Rus said. I thought he must have seen my own sadness and understood what it came from.  


I sighed. "Yeah, I hope so."  


Cherry wrinkled his nose ridge and sneered. "YOU DISGUST ME. DO NOT TRY AND GIVE US FALSE HOPE. IF YOU FEEL SO BAD WHY DON'T YOU JUST STEP UP AND ADOPT US YOURSELF?" Cherry said, glaring at me.  


"cause this ain't your universe and we don't know how to take care of bitties." Honey answered, giving the short skeleton a hard look.  


"WE KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES." Cherry retorted, glaring back.  


"then what's your guys's thing with wantin to be adopted?" Honey asked, annoyed.  


"YOU TRY BEING THIS SMALL IN A WORLD CATERED TOWARDS BIG PEOPLE."  


"so that's why you guys said you were tryna find homes." I heard Sans mutter, looking at the smaller skeleton in thought.  


"Well either way being rude isn't going to get you anywhere." I spoke up, gazing down at the bitty. The Sans on my shoulder huffed and sat down again, bones disappearing but magic still on alert.  


"I MOST CERTAINLY AM NOT GOING TO BECOME YOUR TRAINED DOG LIKE THAT USELESS LARGER VERSION OF ME." Cherry said, glaring.  


"Go fuck yourself~" Razz called, sing-song, back into the living room. I swear he could hear someone talking about him from a mile away. 

Cherry jumped, clearly not expecting a response from the monster he was badmouthing but composed himself quickly and sent a glare towards the kitchen.  


He turned back to me. "AS I WAS SAYING, I WILL NOT FALL TO YOUR WHIMS. AND SINCE I AM GIVING YOU NO CHOICE IN THE MATTER ABOUT ADOPTING ME YOU WILL HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT."  


"Oh so you do want to go back to living on the streets? Alright, I'll let Ink know so he can bring you back."  


"SO YOU WILL ADOPT US!" Berry shouted, a wide smile stretching over his teeth as Cherry spluttered.  


"OF COURSE, LITTLE ME! EVEN THOUGH PAPY DOESN'T THINK IT'S A GOOD IDEA I WILL STILL TAKE CARE OF YOU!" Blue voiced his agreement, finally deciding to sit up and smile back at his counterpart. Honey shot him an unamused look that was deflected by a large smile from Blue.  


"SO THAT MEANS RUS CAN STAY WITH US?" Papyrus said, smiling widely and turning back to face his brother. Rus had a nervous but hopeful smile on his teeth.  


Sans shrugged, grin on his teeth widening. “guess we got no choice now.” Papyrus’s smile widened even further and I thought that I had never seen anyone look as happy as he did. 

I smiled as well, his happiness contagious. I looked at the little skeleton on my shoulder. “So what do you think, my friend without a name? Do you want to stay with one of us?” I asked him. 

He looked at me, sockets wide. “you wanta… adopt me?”  


I shrugged my free shoulder, smiling. “Sure, I’m sure anyone here would happily take you in if you didn’t want to stay in this godforsaken universe.”  


“we’ve got plentya room at home for an extra tiny house guest.” Sans said, grinning at his smaller counterpart and shrugging.  


“i... i’ll stay with you, if that’s okay.” The little Sans said, still seeming to be in shock at the new developments.  


“Alright, but you’ll have to help me deal with my own skeletons. They can be a handful sometimes.” I warned him.  


“okay” He nodded, still in a daze. He blinked and snapped out of it. “er, do you, uh, wanna give me a… name? now that, um, you’re my… owner?”  


“I DEMAND A NAME AS WELL.” Cherry spoke up, ruining the moment.  


“Alright, how about Comic?” I asked the Sans.  


“guess i’ll have a lot to live up to” The Sans, Comic, nodded with a grin.  


“WERE YOU NOT LISTENING TO ME? I DEMAND YOU GIVE ME A NAME AS WELL, WORTHLESS PEASANT.” Cherry demanded, glaring up at me.  


“Why? I thought names were only given to bitties that were being adopted?” I retorted, maybe a little harsh, as I looked down at him.  


“merciless” Comic commented, sitting down on my shoulder and watching how the encounter would play out with rapt attention.  


Cherry’s face heated a bright purple and he spluttered. _A trait carried over from Razz._ I thought in mild amusement. “YOU ARE ADOPTING ME WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT, PEASANT. NOW GIVE ME A NAME.”  


“Mm, no.” I said, resting my chin in my hand. His face turned a darker purple.  


“YOU DON’T GET TO DEFY ME! I AM YOUR SUPERIOR AND YOU WILL OBEY ME! WHICH MEANS YOU WILL BE ADOPTING ME. I REFUSE TO LET YOU BRING THAT USELESS SANSY INTO YOUR CARE WITHOUT ALSO ADOPTING ME!”  


“If you’re superior to me why do you want to be adopted? Because by how you’re making yourself sound, you should be perfectly capable of handling yourself.” I said, tilting my head at him. I didn’t give him time to respond. “Furthermore, I can care for anyone I want to. Comic didn’t force himself onto me and I enjoy his presence, unlike you.” Comic made a low whistling sound through his teeth. Cherry’s face went as purple as I thought it could.  


“FINE. I WILL LIVE ON MY OWN BECAUSE I DON’T NEED YOUR TAUNTING, WORTHLESS HUMAN. AND I WILL BECOME SO GREAT AND SUCCESSFUL ON MY OWN THAT YOU WILL REGRET NOT ADOPTING ME WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE! AND WHEN YOU COME CRAWLING BACK TO ME, GROVELING UNDER MY SHEER MALEFICENCE, I WILL LAUGH IN YOUR FACE. SO DO NOT TEST ME, HUMAN. I WILL GIVE YOU UNTIL THE END OF TONIGHT TO MAKE YOUR CHOICE AND FOR YOUR SAKE I HOPE YOU MAKE THE BEST ONE.” I rolled my eyes as the little skeleton gave his speech and then left.  


“I’m glad that he thinks he’s the one calling the shots. He definitely is Razz’s counterpart.” I said dryly, watching him go over to Syrup’s bitty who was still having a stare off with his larger counterpart, and pulling him to the side. He almost got blasted by the blasters still summoned.  


“think you’ll be takin him in too?” Honey asked me, studying me curiously. Stretch had stretched out over his shoulder and was sleeping again.  


“God I don’t want to. One Razz is enough and it took me long enough to break the first one to be more liveable, I don’t want to do that all over again.” I said, sighing. My morals would probably get the better of me though, as long as the little menace didn’t do anything too unforgivable. I hated my morals sometimes.  


“you know how to handle ‘im though. ‘m sure it won’t take nearly as long to get through to him.” Honey reassured me, giving me a slight pitying grin.  


I groaned. “I’ll just come live with you guys. Blue, you’ve got a new roommate!”  


“OKAY!” Blue agreed happily.  


“nooo, sweetness, don’t leave me all alone with sanss” Syrup cried out, teleporting and crashing into me, knocking us both sideways. He wrapped his arms around me and laid on top me, effectively ensnaring me.  


“I can fucking hear you, you piece of shit!” Razz yelled. Syrup only made a low keening noise and refused to let go of me.  


“Nevermind, I’m going to burn in hell here. Why did I get stuck with these losers?” I muttered, sighing as Syrup hugged me tighter.  


“heh, okay there, kiddo? ya look a little wrapped up to me.” Comic said, making me just now realize he was no longer on my shoulder. Probably for the best, since I’m now lying on the ground with a skeleton on top of me. 

I looked backwards and saw the little skeleton on Honey’s shoulder, smiling a little worriedly down at me. Everyone else just seemed amused. _Traitors._  


“This isn’t that uncommon, Comic. If you don’t get deterred by my two pains in the ass that I live with you’ll get used to it.” I told him, wiggling my arms free of Syrup’s grasp and pushing myself up.  


“‘m not a pain in the ass.” Syrup mumbled into my side since he refused to let go of me.  


“The faster you come to terms with it the better your life will be.” I told him, patting his skull.  


Comic laughed unsurely. “alright, kiddo, if ya say so.”  


Syrup eventually got off my side to move into a sitting position, cradling me in his lap instead. 

"Get your bony chin off me. You hurt." I complained, pushing his skull away from the top of my head. I was still wrapped up in Syrup's lanky arms which luckily weren't that uncomfortable, but his chin digging into my head was less than ideal.  


"but sweetness i love you"  


"I don't care, bones aren't soft."  


"you're soft" Syrup hummed, not removing his chin from my head.  


"Because I'm not made of bones!"  


"i didn't ask to be a skeleton" Syrup mumbled. Honey fell over me, both bitties teleporting to the ground where it was safer.  


"nyeh heh, you are pretty soft." Honey's voice was muffled by the carpet. His ribs were digging into my thighs and adding another layer of discomfort to my already uncomfortable situation.  


"Get off me! I'm not a pillow!" I shouted, rolling one skeleton off me and breaking free of the other's hold.  


"sweetness"  


"honey"  


I glared at both of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, been a while. I'm going to come out and say it, but I've kind of lost interest/motivation for this. I don't think I'll be posting any more chapters and if I do I don't know when, but don't hold your breath for them. Sorry for the let down, but I'm glad you've all stuck through this with me.
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
